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hey girl!
Wow! you have a lot going on here, but really it is all one simple issue just kind of blown out of proportion. So first, take a deep breath and remember this is not the end of the world, just a friendship gone a little fuzzy.
So first, do i think think that you pretending to be someone else and texting your friend was mean? I wouldnt consider it necessarily mean, it wasn't the best way you could have handled the situation, but we all make mistakes. As for the rest of your situation with the Small Group, this can all be fixed with one mature, honest, and open conversation with your friend. When it is just you and your friend you have been fighting with/ignoring, explain first very calmly that you think that the 2 of you left off in a bad place after the fight and the summer and if she is up for it, you would like to talk with her and hopefully get to the bottom of your issues and make this valuable friendship work. Explain using "I" statements your situation to her. For example, instead of saying "you are so mean you never listen!" say something more like " I felt really really hurt when you said "_____" to me. Allow your friend to put in her input too- this should not be a one way talk with you simply talking at her and her not getting a chance to tell her side of the story. You can also bring up the Small groups by saying something like, " i think its really great we're in the same small group, maybe this will give us an opportunity to work on our friendship, because i do care about you, a lot, i just think maybe if we were more open with each other, our friendship would work out better" Make sure that during this conversation you cover any topics that have been bothering you and allow her to do the same. This should be a private, honest heart-heart where you can fix everything that has been in your head. Finally, as for your other friend who may not want to be friends with this girl, that is not for you to work out/deal with. You may want to inform your other friend that you made up with the girl you were fighting with and allow her to make her own decisions on whether or not she wants to make up with her or not.
Good luck girl! Let me know if you have any other questions!
Lots of Love
Ellie

hugatree95 on 8/29/2010 10:33:35 AM

Awwee, hun I know you're shy, but the only way you can get him to notice you enough to talk to you is to talk to him. Send him a message asking him if he is homeschooled. And If you are to shy to send him a message then the next time you go to church and you see him, use an excuse to talk to him. You can ask him if if he knows where the bathroom is or if he knows where the hymn books are. And after he helps you, then you ask him how old he is or if he is homeschooled. Then build convo on top of that. Just talking to him will make him be more aware of you expecially if he likes your personality which I am positive he will.

And to get him to notice and like you even more:
Be playful. Don't be uptight. Don't worry about how you look. Don't get too hung up on everything being perfect. Just relax. Smile. Be goofy, crack jokes, and laugh. Be laid back. Have fun.

Use positive body language. Angle yourself toward other people, sit or stand with an upright (but not stiff) posture, and uncross your arms. Make eye contact. Smile often.

Break the touch barrier. Touch him lightly on the arm or shoulder when you're talking. Just make it a quick, innocent touch and don't make a big deal out of it. Holding hands is also a good way to break the touch barrier. The simple act of touching can strengthen the intimacy between you and him. Sometimes a guy will break the touch barrier, and if you're comfortable with him doing so, touch him back.

Compliment him. Be sure to compliment them in a casual and friendly way on things that are true. Sometimes people will make up compliments just to talk to someone, but that is the total wrong thing to do. You really should compliment on things you really like, so you sound more sincere naturally. Some times complimenting their family or other things they are proud of works.

Be confident! But remember, he MAY give you signs that he's not interested, Or he may give you signs that he's all loved up.

I hope this helps

Let me know on my page how you liked my advice

kimmistar95 on 8/20/2010 9:13:42 PM

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