What Makes A Guy Lose Interest?

I’ll be talking to one of my guy friends about his GF, and he’ll tell me how much he likes her, how cool she is, blah blah blah. The next week, he tells me he’s lost interest and is breaking up with her. And nothing has happened—she’s the same girl!

How can guys like a girl one week and not like her the next for no reason?

DAVE: Who says we have to have a reason? Guys can be hot and cold when it comes to relationships. Sometimes, we like the security of knowing we always have someone to hang with. But being with the same person can do a couple of things to the male psyche. First off, it can be boring. Same girl, same stuff. Second, steady companionship can be scary—an intimidating jump from being with your core group of guys to kickin’ it with the same girl all the time. We need a break here and there. Normally, a few days with the guys has us longing for our gal. And the cycle starts all over again.…

BILL: I’ll tell you why guys are so fickle at times, if you’ll tell me why so many cool girls go ga-ga over creeps. The point is that logic takes a vacation in matters of the heart. When logic comes back, the heart usually hits the road. The enduring dilemma of love!

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BY CAITLIN R. ON 3/13/2010 7:00:00 AM 102 COMMENTS

Got His Number...Should I Call?

This guy and I exchanged numbers. 

So what’s next? Do we set up a date? 

Who sets it up?

DAVE: Traditionalists say the guy should take the initiative. With me, there’s no place for tradition when it comes to dating. It leads to a bunch of poor, confused souls sitting around trying to figure out what they’re supposed to do, rather than what they want to do. Since every situation is different, there’s no proper next step. If you want to go out with him and feel comfortable making the first call, go ahead. He must want to go out with you since he gave you his number. Note: If you call and the greeting is, “Domino’s. May I take your order?” you have a problem.

BILL: Hey, this isn’t The Rules for Dating, you know. Dave and I could set up the date, but then you’d have to buy us dinner—and you don’t wanna do that. Unless you’re both in the business of updating the phone book, then I’d say you probably exchanged numbers because you want to see each other socially. If the guy is formal and into dating etiquette, then he should probably call. If he’s a low-key guy who likes and respects you, he’d probably love you to call him. Ask yourself, “If there were no societal expectations, what would I feel natural doing?” Then do it!

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BY CAITLIN R. ON 3/6/2010 7:00:00 AM 98 COMMENTS

Why Are Guys Keepin' Quiet About Who They Like?

 

It seems girls are much more open about their opinions of guys. If a girl likes someone, she tells him. But guys either keep it to themselves or don’t have any opinions at all.

Almost every guy in my class has had a girl tell him she likes him, but very few girls have. Is my class full of shy guys?

DAVE: Your class is full of normal guys. Maybe it’s the girls who have mucked things up in this case. I’m assuming your class is pretty evenly split between guys and girls. If every girl in your class has told a guy she likes him, that doesn’t leave a guy with much choice about which girl to pursue since they’ve all expressed their opinions. So what’s a guy to do? Keep his mouth shut, something that’s pretty easy for most guys.

BILL: There are two theories of male emotional development: Evolution and Creation. The Evolution Theory says guys are actually very evolved emotionally, so evolved that they take rejection much harder than girls. The Creation Theory holds that guys were created like a lump of clay, and that’s about it. Emotional thoughts just don’t occur to them. Either way, you get a species that doesn’t deal openly with feelings. Best bet is to feed them regularly, keep them in front of a sports channel or video game, and lower your expectations.

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BY CAITLIN R. ON 2/27/2010 7:00:00 AM 145 COMMENTS

Is My BF Cheating?

My friends told me my BF cheats on me. I asked him and he denied it, saying he would never cheat. 

Are my friends who I think they are?

Could my BF be cheating?

BILL: Unfortunately, cheating without getting caught can be a thrill for some guys. And show me a cheater—I’ll show you a liar. So if your BF truly is cheating, it’s doubtful he’ll ’fess up. If you want to play this game until you come across some hard evidence, that’s up to you.

DAVE: Make a list of who told you what, and determine if anyone has something to gain by deceiving you. As long as your friends are true to you, I’d speculate that your boyfriend is jerking you around. But maybe your buds have ulterior motives I don’t know about. Only you can make the final decision about who is giving you the straight story.

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BY CAITLIN R. ON 2/20/2010 7:00:00 AM 81 COMMENTS