Boys
My friend says that everything I say is a lie! Every time I say something she goes "Yeah, sure, whatever!" It's really getting annoying that she does that and we get in a lot of fights because of it! We have to do a play together and she's controlling everything! I really want to be her friend, because she's always nice to other people and she's really cool to them too! She used to be my best friend, but since she thought a boy liked her she's been mean! I like the same boy, but she gets mad at me and says I'm copying her! When we do get along we are always together but then she does this! HELP!!!!
- skittle97
Ah yes. Boys always cause problems. That's why we always advise that you never date a friend's crush/ex-boyfriend/etc. Jealousy is not pretty and tears friendships apart -- and it's usually never worth it.
But besides that, she doesn't sound very much like a good friend if she's dismissing everything you say like that. Don't stick around and let her treat you badly just because she treats OTHER people nicely. Look at how she treats YOU. If she's not treating you like a friend, why does she deserve to have you as one?
Try talking to her first, though. The next time she acts like what you have to say is a lie or just not important, call her out on it! Ask her why she always does that and tell her it really bothers you. If she doesn't stop, it might be time to find someone who actually appreciates what you have to say.
<3 Jessie M.
ARE BOYS GIVING YOU THE BLUES? CLICK HERE to submit your own problem to be answered on Girl Talk!
BY ANDREA T. ON 5/8/2008 12:00:00 PM 0 COMMENTS
I am so sick of boys throwing things at me, like pen caps and stuff. And once during PE they threw a baseball at my back! And also, they call me bad names sometimes. I think they treat me this way b/c I have bad acne. I'm not the prettiest thing and am overweight. I’ve told them to stop and I’ve told teachers, but nothing works. I really feel like a baby asking for help, but I really want this to stop!
-Smuckers94
Don't feel like a baby! Anyone in your position would want it to stop, and we're all here for you. However, it is challenging to give you a great answer, because bullies are never easy to deal with. I would try to tell you to talk to them and find out why they're acting this way, or to tell your teachers, but apparently you’ve tried to no success. So, if you can't get them to stop, the next best thing is to learn how to cope.
First off, you definitely need to build up some self-confidence, babe! Honestly, people will pick on the weak to make themselves feel more important—just because they can. But if you don't pay them any attention or let them get to you and hold your head up high, eventually they'll get bored. They do these things to get a response from you. And if they're not getting whatever it is they get out of picking on you, they'll probably give up. But if you don't have any confidence in yourself, you are only letting them win. So try to show that you don't care what they say or do—why would their actions and opinions be of any importance to you? Confidence can give a person a glow like no makeup kit or outfit ever could.
So, if at all possible, avoid and ignore them. Dismiss their immature actions as just that—immature. Of course if they do anything that could hurt you (like throwing a baseball at you!), please tell your teachers or even your principal.
<3 Jessie M.
ARE BOYS GIVING YOU THE BLUES? CLICK HERE to submit your own problem to be answered on Girl Talk!
BY JIAE K. ON 5/2/2008 12:00:00 AM 325 COMMENTS
My BF and I go to different schools. We see each other enough, but I know he has a lot of friends that are girls. I haven’t met his friends so I don’t know if they flirt w/ him and if he flirts w/ them. Also, he is really outgoing and confident around other people but around me, hardly talks. I’m confused beyond belief about his “girl friends” and why he shuts up whenever he’s around me.
-Zabbie
This is definitely something you’ll need to address with him, Zabbie. It’s understandable that you might feel a little worried about his relationship with his gal pals, especially since you don’t know them. But if you have reason to not completely trust him, then you might have a problem that goes deeper than just not knowing his buds.
Try to set up a time to meet and hang out with your BF and his girl friends. Maybe if you get to know them a little you’ll feel a little more comfortable. If you buddy up with them, you can also rely on them to report back to you if anything happens at school. And if you get a chance to see the way they act around each other, you’ll either be able to set your fears at ease, or confirm them and then address them with him.
The fact that he clams up around you could quite possibly be a good thing (even though it doesn’t seem like it). A lot of people get really nervous around the people that they like and therefore may feel and act unlike their usual self. Give him some time to loosen up, especially if you’ve recently started dating. Also, the more at ease and chatty you are, the more likely he’ll reciprocate.
<3 Jessie M.
ARE BOYS GIVING YOU THE BLUES? CLICK HERE to submit your own problem to be answered on Girl Talk!
BY JIAE K. ON 4/25/2008 12:00:00 AM 205 COMMENTS
I just started homeschooling and found out there's a guy at my old school that wants to go out with me. We have similar interests and he's sweet, nice and kind. It seems like a match made in heaven. Only two problems, both our parents think we are too young to date and he is two years older than me. He's going to be in high school next year. I want to go back to school for him. He says he loves me. Should we date without telling our parents?
-Alexa
Alexa,
When it comes to your education, you really have to put a lot of thought into your actions. Turning down an awesome school opportunity you've been looking forward to for a boy who 1) your parents don't approve of and 2) you don't have a clear and established relationship with may very well lead to one thing: regret. Even if you do go back to your regular school, he'll be gone and in high school in a few months.
Dating, especially in the younger teen years, should definitely be done with parental permission. Going behind their backs is only going to create trust issues for later. Show them how responsible and mature you are now and chances are they'll be willing to give you more freedom as you get older.
Stick with the homeschooling thing, at least for a while. It sounds like something you're really interested in. If it doesn't work out, you can always reevaluate your choice later on. Plus, homeschoolers tend to have networks of other homeschoolers who they join for activities, field trips and other get-togethers. Who knows, maybe there's a fun, new boy you have yet to meet because he's homeschooled too!
-Alli
BY JIAE K. ON 4/18/2008 12:00:00 AM 271 COMMENTS