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I'm too pushy with guys. How can I dial that back?

Every time I have a crush, I sort of try to force my friendship on him. I don't mean to be pushy, it just sort...
27 Comments | Add Yours

So, there's this guy I started talking to a while back, and as much as I didn't mean for it to happen, now I'm majorly crushing on him. We've gotten to know each other and I know he likes me at least as a friend, but he's had some sort of problem with his last relationship (which I don't know much about and I'm not about to pry into) and he's also 2 years older than me. He's mostly pretty quiet, but he's opening up to me more than he does for other people. Advice? Suggestions? PLEASE!! Stuck between a rock and a possibly unrequited crush, here!



Hey girly girl! I'd try to hang with this guy just the two of you. Maybe, invite him to the movies, or to hang one day after school. Then, you'll be able to gage how he feels better. 


Becca G.

by sparklemcp on 4/16/2011 7:01:47 PM


please help me!
my crush has a close friend that is in his little group. however, a guy came back to our school who got suspended.Lets call him J. even though i never talk to my crush, I have noticed that it seems that my crush's friend is becoming friend with J and leaving my crush in the dust. I wanna help, but without looking like i was watching my crush's every move!!!
please respond as soon as possible!!!!
thank you!

In all honestly theres not a whole lot you can do to help your crush. He has to deal with his friend situation on his own. Sorry. xoxo kerra 
Kerra S.

by kmn21 on 1/12/2011 9:22:59 PM


mod mod mod mod! another question i have is, at our school we have this babsketball program where a boy and a girl both team up, who where both on the 8th grade basketball team, and they pick teams and stay together for the entire month of march. and one of my crushes is on the 8th grade team. idk if he has a girlfriend, so im just taking it slow now by just teaming up just to be friends and all. any idea how to team up without seeming to forward??


Hey girl!  If you want to team up with this dude (I think it sounds like a great way to get to know him better!), you'll have to be at least a teensy bit forward.  Bring up the idea of the program in conversation, and ask him if he has a partner yet.  That might give him the hint.  If he doesn't catch on, just ask!  Smile

Marie H.

by kmn21 on 1/10/2011 8:52:58 PM


how do you ask for a guy friends number, without giving him the wrong idea? because i gave this guy my number, but he never gave his to me, so i just wanted to have it just in case since we have 3 classes together.
just wondering!!!

Hey girlie,

If you gave your number to him and he never used it, I'd probably avoid asking him for his. You might want it just because you're friends and classmates, but "getting a number" def has more flirty/romantic meaning than you might intend. Instead of asking him, I'd prob try to find a mutual friend who has it if you ever actually need it!

Lauren C.

by kmn21 on 1/10/2011 8:46:46 PM


please help!
so i like 2 boys right now. like idk much about them either. like for both to them, im scared to talk to them, because it dont want to be too obvious i like them. so one on my crushes, lets call A, (i was listening to his "best friends convo) said he doesnt want to date anyone right now, but idk if that is true or not. but if it is i am probably willing to wait. The other guy lets call, B, hangs out with the cool kids that are in 8th grader. we are all iiin 7th grade. so i am wondering, should i wait to talk to him til next year so he is not always surrounded by a herd of 8th graders all the time??
please help me ASAP!!

Hey chica,

Talk to them both right now! You like them both so you can learn more about them without them thinking you like them. Just be friendly and warm and, when you start talking to them, relax. Talk about things you like and try to discover common interests you both share Smile If you give it time and learn more about them, you'll get a better sense of which one "clicks" with you better! Smile 

Lauren C.

by kmn21 on 1/10/2011 8:44:24 PM


Mod!! I need help! I really like this guy and I want to ask him out. I'm not scared to or anything, I just don't know ANYTHING about about dating or what to do with him or what to talk about. I know people always say to be myself but it's hard for me even with new friends. I'm 14 and I think it should come naturally (I don't go to public school idk it that the reason). But can you give me the run down of dating and some advice? Thanks soooo much(:

Hey girlie! We have a great article on our website which can help you get that guy to ask you out ( If you need advice on dating, we have that covered too with our "Dating 101" section ( Good luck! 
Jessica W.

by sn101262 on 1/3/2011 1:32:26 AM


MOD MOD MOD Aww thanks, Marie H. =) thats really good advice, your my new fave mod =)


Oh wow, thanks so much! Smile  I'm always glad to know I can help. 

Marie H.

by LissieLou on 12/27/2010 10:51:46 PM


MOD MOD MOD I thought maybe I could get a 'professional' opinion on this... haha ok, so I like this guy, and for a while i was pretty sure he liked me too, we would always talk, and he would say flirty things to me, but now he doesnt really do that stuff and he rarely talks to me on facebook anymore, i just got texting but im not sure how to tell him my number, what do you think is going on and what should i do? , thanks btw. =)


Hey girl!  Oh geez, I wish I could say I was an "expert" on boys!  But we'll think this through. Smile It's hard to say for sure exactly why he stopped.  But if you want it to start again, then it's up to you to reach out.  Giving him your number is a great idea.  You could try to cover and say you might have a homework question or something, but it's much easier to just be direct.  You could invite him to do something with you and your friends, and say you will text him the deets later (oh, but you don't have his number!).  Or you could just ask him for his directly.  Once you get it, check out this tip for an easy way to start the first convo:  xoxo

Marie H.

by LissieLou on 12/27/2010 10:37:43 PM


I am probably the exact opposite of pushy..
I feel like I don't show my boyfriend I truly love him sometimes. He knows I love him, but how can I actually prove it? He always has his arm around me or something and I just sit there. What should I do.
Feeling stupid..


Hey girlie. Try doing nice things for him or telling him how much you appreciate him. You never have to do anything physical with him to prove your love-remember that.

Elizabeth P.

by brook4368 on 12/21/2010 6:59:33 PM


So there is this girl I know named Miki that is totally OBSESSED with one of my best guy friends! She hates it when I talk to him or don't include her in every bit of my life or his. Shes one of my friends, but she has threatened me with hurtful words, and i cant take it anymore! I have asked my friend if he liked her but he replied,"Never, I'm not interested!!". And when Miki asked me if he liked her i told her the truth months ago, but she still believes that he is in love with her....*little crazy*....What should I do???? I want to remain good friends with both of them but it doesn't seem like that will work. Thanks!


Hey girlie, none of your friends should verbally threaten you. I don't think you should be MIKI friend anymore if so you need to confront her and tell her she needs to change or you guys can't be friends anymore

Paige T.

by ZEALDANCER on 12/18/2010 2:21:01 AM

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