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Friend fight 411: What to do when you're stuck in the middle

You and your two besties have been like the three musketeers since forever. But now, they’re having a huge fight, and you’re caught in between. Here’s how...
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Explain to them with logic that they shouldn't be fighting at all. Don't forget to tell them that they're ticking you off.

by peppercyndaquil13 on 9/1/2012 9:50:58 PM

 
 



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I really can't stand it when a lot people have luck. Maybe I'm jealous, I'm willing to admit that, but seriously, I don't understand how my classmate has top grades, is the life of the party, and the teacher's pet! Like for example, The boys in our class make some joke, they get in trouble. She makes an equally-bad joke, she's still floating. I really try my hardest but apparently she will always be the lucky one. I don't like gossiping about her, though. It kills me when she's nice. Help, please!
_LIZHEARTSLONDON_

 

Hey girlie,

It's totally normal to be jealous of girls who seem to "have it all" !! We've all been there! But remember that even those girls have weaknesses somewhere. You might not see them, but they're there. They're scared of something, they dislike something about themselves, and there's something about their lives that makes them nervous. They might seem perfect, but they're not! Personally, I would focus on one area that you'd like to improve. It seems like the most important right now is grades - so work hard to do your homework, study for tests, and ask any questions you have. Be open with your teacher and commit to getting higher grades. That way, you know you tried your hardest and THAT should make you proud! <3


Lauren C.

by LizHeartsLondon on 8/30/2012 6:18:30 PM

 
 



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One of my friends at school is attached to my hip, but in a bad way. She follows me around everywhere I go, and she walks and sits extremely close to me which is a big invasion of my personal space. Her being around me all the time is starting to get annoying, but I don't want to be rude about it. How do I get her to back off?




Hey girlie,

Don't be afraid to stand your ground! Keep your cool so you don't say something you'll regret later, but be clear about wanting your space. Say you have to go to your locker to get something during lunch. Your friend doesn't have to come with you for that, so say something like - "Hey, I'm gonna run to my locker real quick. Stay here, I'll be right back." If she's sitting too close, be straight with her - "Hey, can you move over? I feel kinda crowded." You don't have to be mean about it or have a "talk" with her about her behavior - just take each situation as it comes and be subtle but firm <3 
Lauren C.

by jayhawk94 on 8/30/2012 4:57:37 PM

 
 

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OK, so I have this friend 'C' who is really sweet--if at sometimes a little annoying--but I'm pretty sure she has a violent side. Sometimes she says things, like 'when ______ says that, I just want to punch her in the stomach!' or even more violent things than that! But I've never seen her carry out these threats, although she did talk to me once about how if someone is mean to her, she'll 'sass' them so hard they never want to talk to her again. She said she 'sassed' (I'm not sure exactly what she says) one of the popular girls in our grade, 'S' who I happen to be sorta-friends with. And I've never seen S talk to C. But here's the thing. Should I tell her it's wrong to think violently? Should I mention how much the concept of 'sassing' people to the point they never want to look at you again is kinda demented? Should I confront her at all? C can be very opinionated, but I'm not sure if this is something I should let slip by (sorry if this is long)

Hey girl,

A lot of people say things like that without actually following through, but if she's being mean to one of your friends you can ask her to not talk about her while you're around. And if she keeps saying things like that, you can tell her that it's not nice to talk about that, even if you don't mean it!

Meghan D.

by emonade on 8/25/2012 12:43:28 AM

 
 

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I've been bffs with this girl since 3rd grade.In second grade I was still friends with her but she had this bff who she had a huge fight with at the end of that year so that's why she's bffs with me.Fast forward now, to sixth grade.For some reason during 5th grade she became friends with that girl she had a huge fight with again, but that was fine.Now ever since sixth grade started she's been hanging with her a lot and barely talks to me anymore.She doesn't even sit with me at lunch.Its like this girl is a better choice than me for her.I'm really really confused over this, am another one of my friends who was friends with my bff too feels the same way.I can't just tell my bff, that would be too awkard.Please I miss her so much she was one of the only people I could be myself with..

 

Hey girl! You should definitely talk to her! It won't be awkward if you say it nicely and calmly! Just be like "hey, I really miss you! I feel like we haven't hung out a lot recently!". See where it goes from there! Maybe you could even try to be friends with the other girl too that way your friend wouldn't have to choose between friends! xoxo

Carly S.

by katniss50309 on 8/24/2012 4:33:43 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD my bff never wants to do anthing or hang out with me and when she can she get really sick.what should I do?

 


Hey girlie,

You can't force someone to hang out - so if you keep trying and she doesn't seem into it, try not to waste your time. Focus on other friends, join a new club, hang out with the fam, or pick up a new hobby to take your mind off it. You want to be around friends who also want to be around you - if you gotta twist her arm to hang out, she isn't worth it! <3 


Lauren C.

by horseirl on 8/23/2012 9:46:24 PM

 
 

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about the question you just awnsered, i don't want to be h's friend because I don't like her one bit and neither does she.but she doesn't know that i know she doen't like me.but it doen't stop her from coming up to me and talking to me so what should i say.btw we aren't going to a new school

 

Hey chica! Even though you both don't want to be friends you should try and stay polite so that if you have to work together you can! But try and approach the issue! Maybe meet with a school counselor! If you two work out your issues and end your friendship on good terms you won't have to deal with awkward run ins! Hope this helps! xoxo

Carly S.

by cgirl109 on 8/21/2012 4:17:04 PM

 
 

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ok so school is satrting in a week and i have a question about an old friend.so like there's this girl h who was my friend.well when we were both in school still i thought that she thought we were friends.(i never liked her since last year after a big fight.)but my friend l said that h didn't like me either and now since school is starting and where in the same class what should i say to her when she comes up and talks to me?sorry if this is confusing,but can u please awnser this as best as u can. thanks!

 

 

Hey sweets! Going into a new school year is a fresh start; how about giving her one? Try going into the first day of school with an open mind! Think about what good friends you used to be and be open to being her friend again. Be nice and friendly to her on the first few days of school and see where it goes from there! Good luck! xoxo

Carly S.

by cgirl109 on 8/21/2012 4:03:02 PM

 
 



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My "best friend" doesn't feel like a friend to me anymore. We just don't have the same interests. She is into girly stuff and I'm more into rocker-ish stuff. We don't like the same music or clothes, and I feel like sometimes she isn't exactly respectful of the things I like. Our friendship has been on and off for the past year, and I want to end it for good. But how exactly do you let a friendship "fade"? Just stop talking or what? 0.o

 

Hey chicky! To let a friendship fade, try calling her less and spending more time with your other friends.  Don't stop talking altogether- that can seem mean, and you don't want that.  You can just make plans with other girls instead of your best friend.  Be warned: if she asks you what's up, you have to be honest and say you don't have much in common anymore and that might really hurt her feelings. xoxo 


Kate G.

by myclique on 8/21/2012 2:39:30 PM

 
 



MODMODMOD Okay my Friend C is really rude and stuck up to all of my friends and me!!!!I heard that she has been talking behind my back i really dont want to put up with her when school starts this next week what do i DO!!!!!
-Serra

 

Hey girl! It might be time to distance yourself from your friend, but do it carefully! You don't want to be mean.  Instead of icing her out, just slowly start cooling down your friendship.  At a certain point, you'll also need to confront her about talking behind your back.  If she asks why you aren't as friendly, tell her that she hurt your feelings.  She might be willig to change her atitude if she realizes her friends aren't going to put up with it anymore. xoxo  


Kate G.

by boycrusher191 on 8/20/2012 4:35:15 PM

 
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