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My best friend is acting like a different person

My best friend and I used to have so much fun together. We played outside, made up stories, acted them out, etc. Last summer, she went...
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MODMODMODMODMOD!
Ok soo my best friend is sooo sweet. Let me tell you how it started. My old friends ditched me and about a week later, much to my pleasure, she came to our school. Back then i didnt really notice it, but now all she wants to talk about is politicts, relegion, and stuff about how the state she lived in is soo much better than this one. It makes me feel really uncomfortable. I went into middle school this year and have become really close with a group of girls. Ive tried to "naturally" start going seperate ways, it isnt working. She recently introduced me to a friend she made! She is really nice and we hung out after school once. She lives pretty close to me, and she saw us in my front yard. Instead of coming to hang out with us, she screamed in my face, "STOP STEALING MY FRIENDS!" How can i get away from this girl without hurtig her feelings?

 

Hey girl! Just try and slowly stop hanging out with her. It's tough, but slowly the two of you will drift apart and go your separate ways. xoxo 


Katie L.

by Casey713 on 1/2/2013 4:55:07 PM

 
 

my and a girl use to be bff now she is my enemy I tried to makes friends with her once more but she changed. I know how that feels Frown

by kellian on 12/28/2012 6:42:49 PM

 
 

I know how you feel, and sadly friends do change but maybe there is a way to get your friend back. You need to talk to her privately and tell her how you think she has changed and try to work this out. Your friendship is worth it definetly, and once you talk to her you can decide if she is a true friend worth keeping. If she doesn't like what you have to say and gets mad tell her how you miss her. If she still is mad maybe she isn't a true friend...and I'm sure thats really hard. I went through that same thing, and I'm very sorry some people just get influenced by others. Try to communicate how she is changing. Thanks! Good luck girlie!
-Bailey

by Bailey72 on 12/13/2012 7:18:27 PM

 
 

Same thing happened to me but instead of camp different classes now she is best friends with someone else and I don't mind her new friend because she is funny and kind, its just her new personality and style that seems a little different ...

by Ashie333 on 12/12/2012 4:52:06 PM

 
 



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So I go to a school with only 9 people in it. But the girls are all really dirty. And I hate it. Like whatever someone says they start cracking up cause no matter what they find a way to take it wrong. Help! Frown




Just don't laugh at their jokes, so they know they aren't funny! 
mailyse f.

by jerjer6 on 12/7/2012 4:26:32 PM

 
 





MOD MOD MOD!!!
So I'm a freshman in high school and, well, it sucks. I don't fit in. My best friends lives in a different state and as close as we are, it's still hard. I have 3 really good friends and a few good friends, but I still don't feel like I truly have a place. I really like a guy and I have for a few years now. We're REALLY close. He goes to my brother school(I go to an all girl school) and I feel like he's the only person (in the state) that I can be myself around and not be made fun of or frowned upon. He has a GF who he's been dating for half a year. That kills me. And I can't talk to my friends about it because they all love her, cause she's perfect! She's beautiful and charming and has a wonderful personality, just like every girl at my school. But me. I'm tall, awkward, and weird. I just don't feel like I fit in. How can I find my place?

 

Hey kk25225, what about your 3 really good friends? Do they go to your school?  

 

 

 

 


Lynae P.

by kk25225 on 12/2/2012 9:11:13 PM

 
 

I have a friend to we were best friends for years and years and now whenever I talk to her she just glares at me what should I do?

by kayapup1234 on 11/24/2012 1:27:10 PM

 
 



Dear Carol,
I like this guy at school. But I can't get anywhere near him without blushing. HELP!!!
-Blusher

 

 

Hey Girl! Actually when you post comments, it us moderators who answer. To submit a Dear Carol go to this link:

 http://www.girlslife.com/page/Get-Advice.aspx 

 

Hannah H. 


Hannah H.

by ariel6412 on 11/20/2012 2:47:09 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
I used to be bullied in middle school for being sensitive I took peoples advise now I don't cry as much and now I'm a freshman in high school and when I get teary eyed I quickly calm down but I'm always paranoid now about people hurting me, or getting too annoying for people even though my friends say "Your too quiet to be annoying." But I'm so paranoid about getting bullied I don't want it EVER to happen again

 

Hey girlie, just be confident in yourself and don't take things personally. Be friends with people that you know are good people and if you're happy and confident, you won't bug people.  


Lauren T.

by hinatagal on 11/18/2012 7:49:28 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD
how do i ask carol about my probs?

 

Hey girlie, visit this link to submit your questions to Carol http://www.girlslife.com/page/Get-Advice.aspx 


Lauren T.

by eflans838 on 11/18/2012 5:44:34 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD
My Best friends and I were friends since 3rd grade. At 5th grade things were getting rocky but was still tight.Or that is what i thought.At 6th grade i let my enemy since 3rd grade hang with us because her friends stoped coming to the program we have been going to.Next thing i know she is taking over my group of best friends turning them against me.one of her best friends she ditchedhung out with me(she is now one of my best friends).It is now a year later and my closest best friend out of the group is acting like im not there and wont talk to me.i have moved on but every time I think about it or see she I get angry and sad.I want to confront her about it but i dont see her alot and i know i will start braweling my eyes out(and i am surely not a person who crys)HELP!

Hey girl,

wow, that sounds like a sticky situation! It's totally normal to change who your friends are over time, but is there a way that all of you can get along? Try sitting down with the girl you don't like and talk about the issue that's between you--you may have more in common than you thought! And as for your other friend, I would try talking to her one on one, too. Communication really is the best policy! I wouldn't "confront" her, but just say that you miss being friends and talk about what's between you.

Meghan D.

by GL4LIFE1 on 11/18/2012 12:32:16 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD ok me and my best bestfriend are (were) very close but first she started acting like me. Then she started liking the same guy as me but she didn't know i liked him.So he gave me a nickname then she basiclly made him give her a nickname just like it.Also she invited me to her birthday party and i was execited to go but but the day of the party when i begged my mom to let me get her a nice birthday present she told me i could not come because she invited her cousins over.PS. she got her room re-done for her birthday just like i did three months ago.please i need your advice what should i do. Do you think i should just forgive her for all the things she has done or should we just become more distant

 

Hey rockrocker101, maybe you should give her one more chance and if things go bad again, then the friendship should end. She may not be aware her actions are hurting you, so you could talk to her about this stuff. Seems like you two had a good friendship and it can be saved. Hope this helps! Xoxo 


Lynae P.

by rockrocker101 on 11/15/2012 9:52:16 PM

 
 

I hope that your friend realizes that she has a great friend right in front of her!!!!! You are fine the way you are, so really, you need to tell your friend that you love her, but she cant just leave you in the dust!!!

by MountainLover456 on 11/14/2012 7:03:27 AM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD!
my bestie and i are way close-but we used to be closer-she did some stuff with a guy that she promised me she wouldnt do for a REALLY long time i got over it but one of her other friends told her i was telling everybody about it (and i wasnt)and she believed the other girl over me! now im not sure i can tell her things i used to tell her

Hey girl,

What your friend does with guys is her business, but if you're worried for her safety, it's a good idea to confide in a trusted adult. Did you tell anyone what she told you? If not, you have nothing to worry about! Just explain the situation to her calmly and tell her you didn't, without blaming anyone else. And if you did tell someone, apologize for telling her secret and ask for her forgiveness. If you're as close as you say, I'm sure you'll be able to work things out Smile And don't be afraid to go to a guidance counselor or parent if you need a facilitator for a discussion between the two of you.

Meghan D.

by prettygirl4351 on 11/3/2012 10:09:54 PM

 
 

Dear Carol,
my best friend that ive known for years has been being mean to me. She has two new BFFs that supposaly was known for the same time as me. But she said i have to listen to her cause shes popular now. i said no and she said fine well you wont get anywhere in life. last night at a party i was a cat. i had n a jumpsuit. she said is that a jumpsuit. i said yes and she said, why would you wear that?. its really hurting and she says im her best feriend and the other girls are her best bests. when we were singing along to the songs at the party her and the girls would get up to eachother and sing it. she did it to me, but when she realized it was just be she frowned. The two girls like me and i like them. we are decent friends, but its like the one i told secrets and stuff to hates me now but still wont let go of me.
- hurting

by themaingirl on 10/27/2012 12:38:05 PM

 
 

At my cousins wedding i was a flowergirl andso was two of my new cousins. one of them was so mean to the other one and when she was talking she would stop for a second and then the other one would start talking and then the other one would say i wasnt finished yet and start talking again. i want to be friends with both of them but they are normaly with each other so i cant play with one of them at a time. HELP ME!!!! What should i do?

 

Hey girly, siblings are usually a package deal so it might be hard to get to know one without the other. And it's also possible that the one was just having a bad day. Try giving the packaged deal another chance and see how it goes. If you'd rather hang with them apart, you could start calling or texting them invites to hang seperately, It might be good though, to text both of them around the same time so no one starts to think you only like one and not the other. Texting them at the same time will prevent anyone from getting their feelings hurt. 

Lauren I.

by Country Girl 2020 on 10/19/2012 9:18:08 AM

 
 

The same thing has happened to me, my friend started acting different and hanging out with others and giving me the cold shoulder.

My advice is that you should tell her that you feel left out and that your drifting apart. Also realize that people change and you will grow apart from your friends.

by EED13 on 10/12/2012 1:58:15 PM

 
 


MOD MOD MOD!!!
ok so i have this freind(b) and she just started playing vollyball on my team... she told anouther of my freinds(k) that im awful at vollyball... and then e and i were talking about vollyball and she told me someone told her that im really bad at it... idk why but i immediaty guessed b and she told me i was right. im not the BEST player but i dont think im bad... and it really hurts that b would say somthing like that.


 


 


Hannah H.

by PS2905 on 10/11/2012 4:30:44 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD,
Last year me and some of my closest friends were really good friends with this girl named Tess. She was super funny and just fun to be around. Also last year, the most popular girl in our school moved away. My friends and I are popular just not the most in the school. So this year, Tess kinda took the spot of the girl who moved away. Because we are in the same group of friends, I see her a lot but she never talks to me. This morning, I saw her walk by and I said hey Tess, but she didn't say anything back, she just rolled her eyes and kept walking. She used to invite us to hang out or do something almost every week and now she just asks her two other popular friends to, not us. I don't know what to de because I still wanna be friends with her but not if she is going to act like that. What should I do? Thanks!

 

Hey girl! Ouch, sounds like shes not being super nice. If I were you, I would move on. There's plenty of more girls who are a lot kinder and won't ditch you for something as silly as "popularity". power to ya, chica!

xoxo 


Katie L.

by danceforever58 on 10/10/2012 4:38:40 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
Ok so i have this "friend" at church that is so darn clingy to me!! she always wants to sit by me, match me, and be with me. Its so annoying cause she is only nice to me and she is awfully mean to her siblings. like really mean. every single day when i walk into sunday school she screams "SIT BY ME!!!" If i dont it would make me seem mean. so i always end up miserably sitting with her every single day when i could be sitting with my real friends. also she calls me her BFF. i kinda went along with it last yr but now im just getting sick of it. also, she has these social issues. i feel like an on and off again friend. do you think that i should confront her? if i do what should i say?

 

hey girl! I know exactly what you're going through, I've had similar situations happen to me. It sounds like you're a really nice person. And you shouldn't change that! But I do think you should work on expressing your opinions and emotions. No one can MAKE you be their friend. If she screams "sit by me!" say "I'm sorry, I promised so-and-so I'd sit next to them!" Do little things like that. You don't want to hurt her feelings by confronting her. That'd be harsh! Just try and drop little hints. Hang out with other friends and don't let her get to you, chica.

xoxoxo 


Katie L.

by Carrie_Underwood on 10/5/2012 3:35:28 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
I had this friend two yrs ago. she is a grade older than me and she had no friends in her grade. i became her friend and we were great friends. last yr some twins started going to my school. she became rly good friends with them last yr and i tried being friends with her still. now this yr i like never talk to her anymore. im rly sad about it and im not invited to her bday party. she used to be girly and funny, but now shes kinda violent and mean. Frown do u think i should try to be friends with her again or should i give up? thanks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

hey chica! ooh, that's no fun. people will move in and out of your life for as long as you live, while some remain your friend forever. you have to decide which category this friend of yours fits in. do you feel ready to move on, or do you feel you could still be really great friends? thats what you've got to decide!

xoxo 


Katie L.

by Carrie_Underwood on 10/5/2012 2:30:09 PM

 
 

hey. im going through something very similar. last year i was best friends with a girl in some of my classes. we bacame friends quickly and started hanging out all of the time. then she became friends with the most popular girl in our grade. this pissed me off but what really angered me was that she started to ignore me. the only good things that came out of it was that i met my real bff. turns out she was in all of my classes too. lol. good luck!

by pupa413 on 10/1/2012 7:45:13 PM

 
 



mod mod mod
any tips on being voted class president?







People need to know you're running and you need to get your name out there! Try making posters with a catchy slogan and a picture of you so people know who you are. You can also try making stickers and giving them out. Your friends can really help getting the word out! 
mailyse f.

by Carrie_Underwood on 10/1/2012 3:59:03 PM

 
 




MOD MOD MOD
So I really want some help. So use to have 3 girls i hung out with but then one girl got really mad and left. anyways long story. so now i hang out with two girls. and they like each other way more than me and you can tell. So yesterday i had a volleyball game (with my school) but i couldn't make it because i had a soccer game (comp) that interfered. my question is, should my best friends even care about what happened at my game? neither of them EVER texted me and they had a sleep over and never invited me. I found out through instagram. I know, it sucks. So should i continuing hanging out with them or should i find new people to hang out with. I go to a small school on 30 in my class. Also, whenever I say something they gang up on me and attack me basically, one of them never defends me. they defend each other. I don't know what to do!
Anyways thanks in advance for listening to my problemsSmile

 

Hey way2qt4u, it doesn't sound like these girls are good friends girly. I would leave them behind and make some new ones. What about the girls on your volleyball and soccer teams? Are they cool? Do you ever hang with them? Xoxo


Lynae P.

by way2qt4u on 9/30/2012 10:06:50 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
I have a friend (let's call her Kate) with a REALLY strict mom when it comes to grades. Her dad is afraid of her mom and won't say anything, by the way. Anyway, Kate's mom puts so much pressure on her that she blanks out during tests and gets bad grades. So then Kate's mom punishes her by doing things like taking away her bday present or coming to the school to yell at her in front of everyone. Is there anything I can do to help Kate?

 

Hey girlie, I am so, so sorry to hear about what's happening to your friend Kate.  I bet it really hurts to see her go through that.  But it's great to know she has a friend like you look out for her.  The best thing you can do is be there for her - and tell her so.  Let her know that if there's anything you can do to help, she can turn to you.  You could offer to go with her to talk to the school counselor about her sitch - but don't push her to if she's not ready.  You could offer to study together before tests, or even just to have a sleepover after at your place to get her mind off it.  The specifics are up to you - being there is what matters, and you've already got that down.  I hope the sitch gets better for your friend.  xoxo


Marie H.

by genieinabottle on 9/29/2012 7:55:52 AM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD
I went to two camps this year. one up called ls and one called h. The girls at the 1st camp were my bffs for 3 years, one of us left and it fell apart and they decided to exclude me. the second camp i made two great friends and they are going 1st seisson. (the time of ls.) I am worried because at h i would be new and the mean girl is coming back. also they always went 1st, just went 2nd for a year and then now therye 1st again and what if they ditch me? anyway, one of the girls wrote to me in all caps lock :I AM SORRY OK?? CAN U PLEASE FORGIVE ME AND GIVE ME ANOTHER CHANCE??Then y don't u just unregister i feel so stuck and i dont know what to do. 


Hey girl,

I'm sure there are a lot of reasons that they're going to the first session, and it wasn't to exclude you--it might be easier for their families' schedules or a lot of other reasons. They don't have to be sorry to you for when they're going to camp! If you have a strong friendship, it will last into the year regardless of what camp you go to. You can still talk to them during the school year! And as for the mean girl, try making other friends and being nice when you have to talk to her so she doesn't have a reason to be mean! 


Meghan D.

by raeshrimp on 9/28/2012 11:03:19 PM

 
 

that is sad, but it happens to everyone at some point. Frown you can make new friends.

by mustache on 9/27/2012 7:03:16 PM

 
 

Sounds like what happened to my "friend." The girl who she became good friends with was my exfriend and she was bullying me at the moment. My friend even knew that! She was totally brainwashed. Luckily, she moved out of state this summer

by myfatsquirrel on 9/26/2012 4:15:15 PM

 
 

I'm sorry to hear that but I know exactly where you are coming from. It's hard, but just give it some time. Definitely keep in touch with her, and it's really awesome she's still friendly, but maybe take a little bit of a break from your close relationship. Still be friendly with her and don't loose all sight, but maybe try to make some new friends. In a few years, maybe you'll get reacquainted with her and things will be better than they ever were before. I've been in this situation a few times before, so I know just what you are talking about. I know it's difficult, but just hang in there Smile

by chocolover9257 on 9/25/2012 9:16:26 PM

 
 

Jellybelly44
It doesn't matter if ur friend is a lot younger than u it doesn't mean that you've got older that you suddenly need friends that r older
My best friend is 13 and I'm 16 and guess what she's taller than me too its always been 3 years age difference it shouldn't matter now since it didn't matter then

by Colie34720 on 9/25/2012 6:30:59 PM

 
 

Ohhhh I'm so sorry I've been acting like that to my all my friends since I got back from summer vacation in Florida! So sorry I know it must be terrible me and my BFF had a fight my first day back. But she's the only one who thinks we're BFFs we are barley even friends. I mean she's is 10 I'm 13 that's a big difference. ( but She's still taller that me) oh plz help I'm too scared to tell her I don't wanna be her friend any more.

by kellybelly44 on 9/25/2012 1:05:48 AM

 
 

The same thing happened to me except my besties completely iced me out.Then they called me an explicit name behind my back. I'm still a little scarred. Now I have them both in the same class

by arg5890 on 9/24/2012 8:56:34 PM

 
 

Boys, friends, mean girls, middle school?I have advice on all of it. Join this club positions are open so please join i only have a couple members!By the way, i'm on all the time so ask me anything i'll get back to you super soon!Thanks love you!xoxo

by puddinface7 on 9/24/2012 8:54:58 PM

 
 

That's the way friends can be sometimes! I don't think she is purposely neglecting you but she is trying new things with some new friends. Not replacement friends, but new friends. About the tights, skirts, and sweaters... That's why I wear too! C'mon, it's cold outside girl!

by WinnieGirlie on 9/24/2012 7:52:27 PM

 
 

aww, sorry thats too bad...

by nd8 on 9/24/2012 7:26:51 PM

 
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