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I called my bud's school "skanky" and now she's fuming

My BFF is mad because she wanted me to meet her at her school and I said, “I don’t want to go to your skanky...
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by ljbdaisy on 1/20/2013 11:14:34 AM

 
 



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I need some help. So, my best friend and I have been like sisters since I was 5. I mean, we've known each so long it is hard not to. Well, this guy she really likes gave her his number, and she was so excited and she texted me. Well, I replied, "That's awesome!". Then she replied, "IKR! I mean, I'm so pretty!" And then she sent a picture of herself.
That made me feel bad. I feel like over the past two years she has gotten more superficial, and it seems like all she cares about is how she looks and if she has enough clothes. I know she has been having family problems, but not bad enough to change her this much. She has gotten kind of stuck-up and self-absorbed, and it is driving me crazy! What happened to me best friend? I even told her a big secret, and she told everyone. I feel like I can't trust her anymore. Frown

 

 hey! I'm sorry you and your friend are drifting apart. That's really hard to go through. Sometimes it's just a phase and sometimes people really do change, and it's hard to tell right now. The best thing to do is to tell you when you feel upset or when she does things that make you lose trust in her. It may cause conflict but that can be good in the long run if it leads to a mutual realization that you guys just aren't good for each other anymore. Without communication, situations like this can get really messy. good luck to you!


Helen S.

by awesomegirl4everandalways on 1/19/2013 1:38:23 PM

 
 



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My best guy friend and I have been getting into a lot of fights. I'm mad because whenever we're at school he won't talk to me he only talks to the popular crowd unless he's alone he talks to me. When we're outside of school we text like 24/7. Yesterday night I told him I was sick of that. That I don't want a friendship that only works with phones. He said 'okay' and I said 'goodbye then.' But now I miss him and I want to text him and talk to him but what I said was true. Before all this happened I talked to my mom she said he was only playing with me and wouldn't talk to me at school because he doesn't want the populars to see him talk to me. I also talked to my best friend and she said it's better to ignore him. On Friday he said hi to me at school (when we was alone) and I ignored him. When I want to be playful and act mad to happy he says I'm moody and get's mad and tells me that everyone doesn't like me because of that. I don't know what to do, HELP!

 

hey! take the high road and say hi to him at school and strike up a conversation, just like you would with a text but in person. Try talking to him around these popular kids and see what he does. If he ignores you, that's just rude and you should forget about him. I really hope this helps! 


Helen S.

by Angelsfall on 1/19/2013 10:30:30 AM

 
 

Mod mod modmodmod
Thanks Jenn S
Smile

by Wishing13 on 1/19/2013 7:16:15 AM

 
 



MOD!one of my bffs has been irritating me sooo much lately. she didnt change her behavior or anything she just once called me dull and boring which she always does. i didnt tell her but it really hurt me. i dont wanna tell her cause lately she's been kinda happy when i was angry or hurt. i tried to take a break from her for a little while but it didnt work, she still really irritates me.but i dont wanna end our friendship cause then i wont have close friends at school(my other bff doesnt go to my school). please i really need help Frown

 

Hey! In that case you just have to be vocal when she upsets you. This is about a power dynamic in your friendship. When she puts you down she's starting to feel good about herself. Don't let her get away with it, or let the dynamic develop into a pattern. Speak up when she insults you and she will back down. If she gets defensive or says she's just joking/ tries to tell you your feelings aren't valid, remember she's just trying to maintain control over your feelings, which are always valid, no matter what she says. She will stop if you continue to stand up for yourself. 


Helen S.

by mininami28 on 1/19/2013 3:19:19 AM

 
 



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My friend has been meeting guys online in chatrooms. Her parents caught her once and the guy was a total creep but she didn't believe them. She even gave him her address. Her parents took away her internet for a month but now she's back to her old ways. I tried to tell her that online relationships can be dangerous, but she accused me of being judgmental and told me to stay out of her life. I'm worried about her. What should I do?

 

Hey! Unfortunately, there's not a whole lot you can do since you've told your friend that her behavior is dangerous. You can't stop her, but you can tell her parents if this keeps up and you know about it. She may see it as a betrayal now, but her safety is more important. I urge you to tell someone if you find out she's giving out personal info online.    


Helen S.

by smileygirl567 on 1/19/2013 3:08:44 AM

 
 



MODMODMODMOD
So lately my "best" friend (I'm not even sure anymore...) has been really manipulative and saying such mean things about other girls. She calls them really mean names that I don't think anyone deserves to be called, and she blames all her problems on everyone else. I'm so sick of it, but I also know she's going through a really hard time, and she's very insecure. Ughh....help?

 

Hey! Things like this can be really awkward, but honestly the best thing to do in the long run is to discuss your frustration with your friend. It'll keep you from bottling up resentment and getting angry at your friend, seemingly out of nowhere. You can gauge your friend's reaction when you talk to her. Does she flare up instantly and push all the blame your way, or does she seem willing to talk things out? That's a good way to see how much she values your friendship, if she doesn't, it may be best for both of you to find other friends. I really hope this helps!  


Helen S.

by summergirl21 on 1/19/2013 1:02:53 AM

 
 

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My best friend has a sister the same age as mine , and when two of us want to hang out, we're all expected to hang out together. I have more than one friend, and they like the same stuff as me too. But my best friend doesn't like the same stuff, and now it feels like whenever the other three all gang up on me!!! I moved away, but whenever we skype, she always focuses on her, and all the stuff she's won! I always end up with hurt feelings, because both sisters always treat her the best and ignore me. When I was sick, they started a band together, and didn't tell me for 8 months!!! And then they said that they didn't want me to join, because (they thought) I cant sing!!! But the other two sisters (not mine) have been taking voice lessons for 4 years, and I usually end up listening to them brag. What should I do?

Hey girlie,

I would try talking to your friends and be honest with them about hurting your feelings. They might not know they're making you feel that way! Next time they tell you about the cool stuff they're doing, make sure you're being supportive, but tell them about what's going on in your life, too! If they don't want to listen, you might want to try finding a few new friends to spend time with in addition to those girls. And even if you're not in the band, you could still do other fun stuff with them! You don't have to have the same talents to be friends, so try supporting the band and telling them about your abilities too Smile

Meghan D.

by Santana65 on 1/18/2013 10:37:27 PM

 
 

At least you didnt call your friend "skanky", could you imagine if you did that by accident. And just because she called her school skanky, doesnt mean you can too. She probably has reasons for calling it that and maybe she doesnt think you know the whole story and thinks you are actually calling her skanky.

by fashionqn on 1/18/2013 10:15:13 PM

 
 

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My best friend and I fight over the stupidest things but today she was saying "uve been a bit immature lately not that i care but i noticed" because we were talking bout something I said to a friend and I felt bad about it, I was going to say sorry to him when I saw him next time but still felt bad. She supposed to be my best friend and shes commenting on my maturity on that. It really annoyed me. So I started getting angry and she stopped replying cause she doesn't want to fight. But its seriously annoying me. We've been fighting a lot and I'm really just getting tired of her. She seems to think being mature all the time is right. I can understand to be mature in certain situations but being mature all the time is growing up too fast, I want to enjoy my time when I can be immature before I'm an adult and need to be mature. Its seriously annoying me about her, fighting and her trying to be mature basically all the time, what should I do?

Hey girlie,

Maybe she was just concerned for your friend, though there are definitely better ways to handle it. Try having a calm conversation where you tell her that you understood where she was coming from but that you wish she would express her concern in a more constructive way, because it hurts your feelings when she calls you immature. If you both explain your side it will help you get along in the future!

Meghan D.

by HockeyLuver on 1/18/2013 9:04:31 PM

 
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