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Bombshell: My bud told me her dad abuses her

My friend told me her dad abuses her and is always drunk. Her parents are divorced so she only has to go over to his...
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MOD Please Help!
I have been prohibited to seeing my Dad for some time now. He was in jail for six years for Child abuse on me and my 1 sister. He did drugs & was Drunk most days. Him & my mom has been divorsed & now he's cheating on my stepmom. He doesn't care about anyone but himself and he made me feel so insecure. I started binge eating & self-harming. I hated myself & was admitted to a mental hospital by my therapist for suicide awarness & i felt as if I were worthless. I need advice on how to turn my life around & stop being so miserable all the time.
Please help me!

 

Hi girlie, I am so sorry you have had to go through all of that.  First of all, you should know that wanting to make changes in your life is a big step, so be proud of yourself for realizing you want to be happier.  Next, you should keep talking to your therapist and listen to his or her recommendations for you.  If you're speaking to a professional, that's the best thing you can do.  Remind yourself that you aren't worthless and that there are people who love you enough to protect you from your dad. Good luck with your recovery.  xoxo

Kate G.

by XoXo_CaSaNdRa_XoXo on 8/7/2013 2:26:55 PM

 
 

MOD

Hey girlie,


I can only imagine how tough things are for you. Because we wish you only the best, it’s extremely important that you speak to a trusted adult, such as a family member, doctor, guidance counselor, teacher, etc.



 



Also, for additional help, check out: http://www.girlslife.com/post/2008/08/04/HELP!2.aspx



 



, Your Blog Patrol Babes


Meghan D.

by lolomar on 5/4/2013 12:42:57 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
my best friend is being abused by her mom. its not to the point where she has to go to the hospital for things, but its hitting that causes bruising and just tonight her mom punched her in the face. her whole family is diagnosed with depression and her mom has breast cancer on top of that, i think there are other things seriously wrong with her mom mentally...my friend is convinced she even deserves it at times and her grades are slipping and shes always tired and stressed but she refuses to let me tell anyone because she thinks she'll wind up dead. i just don't know what to do, her life fancially would fall apart without her mother...its a lose-lose situation her family is ruined no matter what she chooses to do. i would never forgive myself if something serious happened to her.

Hey girl, check out this post for lots of helpful resources: "Have a serious problem to deal with?"  The most important thing for you to do is to encourage your friend to talk to someone about what's going on.  She can call a hotline (one of the numbers in the link above) or talk to a school counselor or an adult she trusts.  Also, if you need someone to talk to about  your friend, don't hesitate to seek advice from a trusted adult in your life.  The sooner your friend tells someone about the problem, the sooner she can get help to try to make things better.  Good luck, chica. 


Karin E.

by ernsterr on 4/16/2013 1:23:26 AM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!
I kind of have a similar situation; my best friend told me that because her dad smokes so much she is addicted to it also from the second-hand smoke. She feels really guilty because sometimes she goes outside when her dad is smoking because she wants to smell some. She also has heart problems sometimes and she might get lung cancer from this. Her parents are divorced so she could go to her moms house but the court requires her to be at her dads sometimes. I am really worried I don't want her to get cancer!!! Her grandmother on her dads side knows but she can't do anything about it. Her dad has tried the nicotine gum, and patches, and the blue electric cigarettes but nothing last very long. Please help me I don't no what to do!!!

Hey girlie,

I would encourage your friend to talk to a doctor or counselor asap about what she's going through to get pro advice on how to deal with this situation. She needs to speak with a trusted adult to get this taken care of!

Meghan D.

by cya19 on 4/6/2013 11:17:43 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!
Thanks Lauren T, that's exactly what I meant! We are family friends with the family too, and I know they are good people with really good values...so I'm hoping it's just a sense of humor that I don't relate too. It's just been getting to me lately..but thanks for the advice!! Smile

 

Hey girlie, glad I could help! Different people find different things to be funny, but it doesn't make them a bad person. 


Lauren T.

by maggie183 on 3/31/2013 8:59:43 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!
If someone thinks jokes about race are funny..does that make them deep down a racist person or just somebody with a bad sense of humor?? Not really sure how else to word this question.. I have a friend that finds humor in things that sound really racist..but they are SUCH a nice person and I can't picture them really agreeing with the things they are laughing at....idk. Advice please?! Sorry if this made NO sense!!

 

Hey girlie, I think I understand what you're saying. Thinking that something is funny doesn't necessarily equal agreeing with it. I'm sure your friend isn't a racist person. It's probably just her sense of humor. 


Lauren T.

by maggie183 on 3/31/2013 8:25:35 PM

 
 

I kind of have a similar situation; my best friend told me that because her dad smokes so much she is addicted to it also from the second-hand smoke. She feels really guilty because sometimes she goes outside when her dad is smoking because she wants to smell some. She also has heart problems sometimes and she might get lung cancer from this. Her parents are divorced so she could go to her moms house but the court requires her to be at her dads sometimes. I am really worried I don't want her to get cancer!!! Her grandmother on her dads side knows but she can't do anything about it. Her dad has tried the nicotine gum, and patches, and the blue electric cigarettes but nothing last very long. Please help me I don't no what to do!!!

by cya19 on 3/21/2013 8:25:33 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!! my bff has this crush on this guy for 3 years, she finally decided to ask him out in a love letter, when he got it he yelled"NO!" in her face, she was sooooo mad and sooooo sad. Also, her friend is going out with that guy now, i think she needs advice,
XOXO,please respond!

 

 

Hey Chica, that is absolutely awful! He is so not worth it though, so help your friend move on. Have a girls' night and help her to find a new cutie to crush on.

 

 

Hannah H. 
Hannah H.

by iluvsqrls5 on 3/21/2013 7:57:55 AM

 
 

Tell an adult

by I Luv Carson on 3/17/2013 8:05:25 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
I am a very emotional person and can cry or get mad at the drop of a hat...so a few days ago i randomly got really upset while talking with me friend....i was a little mad at her and then it reminded me of something in my past and i started to like tear up and she's like just tell me just wrong and i am just like nothing i'm alright dont worry about me and now she thinks im some sort of wuss and i dont know what to say when i see her




Hey girlie. I would just tell her what you told us. Let her know that you weren't crying about your argument, but about something that it reminded you of. I'm sure she'll understand. 
Florence N.

by Justmecheyenne on 3/8/2013 8:26:01 AM

 
 



Mod mod mod
I have a similar story to this girl. Except my friends parents are not divorced. My friend tells me about how her dad always comes home drunk and hits and yells at her for the smallest things. I don't know what to do. She doesn't seem to care too much but i do coz she is my friend.




Hey girl. I know your instinct is to help her in a way that you might think is best but, I think in this case, you should talk to her about it first. You def don't want to make this harder for her, and you probably aren't aware of all the specifics of the situation. Let her know that you'll be there for her if she ever wants to talk, and that you'll always be on standby if she does need help in any way. Hope this helps!
Florence N.

by summalovin on 3/8/2013 1:13:41 AM

 
 

Sad... Tell an adult right now! Don't wait, any kind of abuse is horrible: Sexual, physical, verbal, mental. They are all bad and should be taken care of immediately. Good luck.

by nirvanaluvr1222 on 3/6/2013 8:07:25 PM

 
 

Offer to help her tell her mom and ask if she can figure it how to be safe from him, away or together. Maybe have a slumber party and have her come over, just to try and lift the heavy weight if u know what I mean

by fashionista997 on 3/6/2013 6:42:21 PM

 
 

I'm so sorry that your friend has to go through this. Try to be there for here and listen when she wants to talk. Remind that you support her and only want to see things get better for her. Also, try to do fun things with her to make her smile and laugh and to get her mind off her problems for a while. Good luck! Hope things get better!

by scamp24 on 3/6/2013 5:46:30 PM

 
 

Definitely tell an adult. Good luckSmile

by myfatsquirrel on 3/6/2013 5:32:42 PM

 
 

Aw...I hope your friend gets through this!!! Smile

by pinklol56 on 3/6/2013 4:49:06 PM

 
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