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Dear Carol: I defended my BFF and now she hates me

My best friend has been acting really hateful because I sent this guy a harsh text because he cheated on her and broke her heart...
18 Comments | Add Yours


Hey girlie, 

I can only
imagine how tough things are for you. Because we wish you only the best, it’s
extremely important that you speak to a trusted adult, such as a family member,
doctor, guidance counselor, teacher, etc.

Also, for
additional help, check out:!2.aspx

, Your Blog Patrol Babes


Meghan D.

by DogsLiveLife on 7/11/2013 8:41:44 PM


MOD MOD MOD MOD Help my friend ( well my ex friend ) is off and on friends with me. One day she want to talk to me and another day she hates me. And today it was really bad because sh got mad at me for no reason and we got into a fight. I got so mad that I started to try to get my other friend to hate her. Because once in fourth grade I told her somthing really personal and she got mad at me and told a girl and that girls friend found out and somtomes I get so mad at her that I don't k know what to do so i just wan to get revenge but that is not the answer

Hey girlie,

You’re right that
revenge isn’t the answer—when someone does something that hurts you, sometimes
the best thing you can do is to be the bigger person and be nice to them
anyway. Try to let go of what’s happened between you two in the past—I’m sure
your classmates have forgotten, too. And your friends shouldn’t have to choose
between you, so don’t put them in that situation! If you don’t want to be
around her, just spend time with those friends one on one and let them do the
same with her, too.


Meghan D.

by DogsLiveLife on 7/11/2013 8:32:34 PM


So this girl at my school just moved here from Vegas (I live in Cali) and she didn't have any friends so I said hey and started hanging out with her we are really great friends but now she's really clingy and won't let me leave her to go hang out with my other friends for a chance. I invited her to do this summer program at the beach with me and all my other friends (that she dosent know). It's kind of a workout program and she's been faking stomach aces and back aches and headaches too and all of my friends are staying with her and helping her feel better i did too for awhile but then I realized she was faking. Now she's been being really mean to me and taking my friendsaway and they are starting to be mean to. This makes me really sad what should I do!


Hey girl, honestly the best thing you can do is talk to her, tell her how you feel. 

lauren r.

by lolowahine on 7/10/2013 8:04:13 PM


I have cut myself 3times. I swear that I don't have any desire to kill myself, I just did it so I could take out my anger on myself instead of other people. I don't want to cut myself...the very fact that I have terrifies me. I just get so full of emotion that if I don't get rid of it ill explode on someone. I don't want to hurt anybody including my self. every time i do it i take a step back and wonder why i did. i have friends and a family i love. even though their have been some rough patches i feel that im a happy person overall. i also know that cutings addictive after i did it ,dispite the pain i wanted to do it again.... okay i just got a bit off subject. my question is how do i handle all this "emotion".




Hey girl,

As hard as it is, you gotta talk to an adult. The Nineline is a great place to find someone to talk to if you don't have the guts just yet to talk to your parents. Here's the contact info:

The Nineline Anonymous Counseling Hotline:



Check out this GL link for extra advice:!2.aspx


The key to stopping is finding a healthy way to deal with stress. For a lot of girls, this means going for a run or hitting the gym to get the adrenaline going. Others find it helpful to keep a journal. Things will get better- all you have to do is ask for help, and the adults you trust around you are the best options.


Caroline C.

by skigirl5o on 7/9/2013 1:24:37 AM



I have a hair problem. I have really hairy legs and my mom won't let me shave. What am supposed to do? I really need some advice


Hey girlie, tell your mom how uncomfortable your hairy legs make you feel. And make sure she takes a good look at them to see the problem. Hopefully the two of you can come to some sort of compromise. Like maybe you only shave below the knee or maybe you're only allowed to shave so often. Keep talking to her, and I'm sure the two of you can work something out. 

Lauren T.

by purple29801 on 6/30/2013 7:12:47 PM


MOD MOD MOD please help!

If your mom got her period when she was 14, and you just turned twelve, might I get it at this age?


Hey chica, every girl gets it at a different age. You can get it earlier or later, there's no real way to tell. I suggest you go see a doctor if you have any more questions! xx  

jess d.

by lil'beautylover27 on 6/28/2013 3:16:34 AM


Thats a good idea, thanks Melissa can you tell Julia I said thanks Smile

by hinatagal on 6/27/2013 3:02:20 PM


MOD MOD MOD My parents already know but would the dean do anything about it. Since its summer and school doesn't start until August.


Hey girl! If you’re still very concerned about these girls bullying you during the school year, go ahead and shoot the dean an email, just so she can keep an eye on the situation. Good luck!


Melissa T.

by hinatagal on 6/27/2013 2:53:13 PM


Thank you I'll check it out after I tell you that there continuing making it into a bigger deal then it was. Before yeah it was a small fight but when that girl gave my ex-best friend my number thats when it turned into harrassment and when the other girl texted me calling me a horrible person thats when it turned into bullying


Hey again! Since you're feeling bullied, definitely let a responsible adult or your parents know. xoxo 

Julie H.

by hinatagal on 6/27/2013 1:12:59 PM


Long story short these girls were harassing me by texting me, we got in a fight and I blocked there numbers. If I should my schools Dean would she do something? This is bullying and harassment but school doesn't start until August. Am I just supposed to forget about it?


Hey girlie, sorry that these girls are being so awful to you. The first step is to tell your parents what's going on (if you haven't already). They'll know how to help you and what to do next. But it's important to know the difference between bullying and just a big fight. If you and these girls fought and then went your separate ways, it may not be such a serious issue, even if your feelings are hurt. But if they continued to be mean to you after your big fight and they won't leave you alone, it's bullying. So let a responsible, trustworthy adult know. And in the meantime, check out our posts on coping with bullies: Good luck, hope things get better!



Julie H.

by hinatagal on 6/27/2013 11:15:39 AM

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