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6 reasons you shouldn't get back together with an ex

The temptation to get back together with an ex can be super strong. After all, you two have a history together and you may wonder what it would be like to revisit a romance with a person from your past. But proceed with caution when dealing with exes. We only want to save you from more emotional turmoil and extra heartbreak. So, before you jump back into a relationship, consider these six reasons why you shouldn’t give it another go with your former beau.

1. Problems that existed before will still be there
If you and your ex had trouble communicating or had clashing personalities while you were together, those will re-emerge if you choose to get back together. You’re going to have to work those issues out or risk having them tear you two apart for a second time.

2. The past is in the past
Looking back on a relationship may make you miss the memories you created together. All of your deep conversations, sweet smooches and inside jokes were special—there’s no doubt about it. But getting back together to try to bring back those memories won’t work and you’ll prevent yourself from growing if you’re too busy reminiscing about what used to be.

3. Your ex won’t cure your loneliness
Without your ex, you may feel lost and lonely. Recognize that those feelings are normal and okay. However, it’s not fair to you or your ex if you get back together simply to have someone around for you to hang out with. Instead, try to call up some of your pals or ask your fam to spend time with you.

4. You two are different people now
Breakups cause people to drift apart—and that is not necessarily a bad thing. After being apart for a while, you and your ex may no longer be compatible. Your wishes and aspirations may have changed. Your ex may have totally new interests and new friends that you don’t relate to or understand. Even though you two were super in sync before, you may not be on the same page now.

5. You need to give yourself time to move on
Getting back together soon after you’ve broken up will momentarily stop the sad feelings for both you of you. But it won’t address the more serious issues that are there: namely, why you broke up in the first place. If you don’t give yourself time to reflect, heal and learn from your breakup, you'll cause more pain down the road.

6. You may miss out on meeting someone totally fab
If you’re still pining for your ex, you may not be able to see all the other amazing people around you—including people who could make an excellent future boyfriend or girlfriend! Settling for someone because you haven’t found a new partner (yet) will only hurt your chances at being happy in the long run.

Have you ever considered getting back together with an ex? How do *you* handle these types of situations?

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by Morgan Ome | 2/14/2018
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