CRUSHES

Advice

My bro's bestie just asked me out. Should I have said yes?

 

I’m 14 and just started my freshman year of high school. My brother’s best friend, who is 17, started his senior year of high school. The other day, the two of us were hanging out, and he asked me out! I said yes because we’re like best friends and I really like him. The thing is, I don’t know how to tell my brother… Should I have said yes??? I’m so confused!

Hey girl! That sounds like quite a tricky sitch. While your brother may be a li’l mad, he needs to hear the truth. It’s not his play to control your love life, but it’s only fair to be honest with him.

Just because your boyfriend is your brother’s bestie doesn’t mean you can’t date him. That said, you do need to be respect the fact that he was your brother’s BFF first. Coming between them would be a one way ticket to your bro’s bad side. Saying yes was a perfectly OK decision as long as you can learn to handle the relationship between you, him and your brother in a fair way.

Now, telling your brother won’t be so fun, but it must get done. One way to approach this convo you’re dreading is to ask his best friend (aka your BF) to come with you when you tell your brother. The two of you can reassure him together that your new romance will not affect their friendship at all—something he should needs to hear from both of you.

No matter how he reacts (angry/worried/sad/protective of you), don’t get defensive or make it seem like you’re teaming up against him. Just have an open convo and let everyone, especially your brother, put their feelings on the table. Don’t expect your brother to jump on board right away, as this will definitely take some getting used to for him.

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by Alyson Katz | 2/1/2016
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