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How to tell your bestie that her crush isn't right for her

We'd do anything for our best friends—all we want is to see them genuinely happy and thriving. So, when your bestie's crush or significant other is clearly not the right person for her, what do you do? It can be hard to approach this situation; you want her to find a better person, but you also don't want to make it seem like you're imposing or attacking her. To help you out, we've compiled four tips on how to tell your close friend that she deserves *so* much better.

Sit down in a private, comfortable environment

First of all, be sure that your conversation is away from a lot of outsiders or other potential sources of discomfort for your bestie. Bringing up her relationship issues in front of others is usually a big no-no—respect her boundaries! You can talk candidly in one of your bedrooms, at a one-on-one bestie cafe date or anywhere else where you'll both feel 100% comfortable.

Be honest...but be kind

Striking a balance between honesty and gentleness can be difficult, but it's key for having conversations like these. When you're speaking to your friend, don't try to overly sugarcoat things. Clearly explain what you think of her crush/SO and why, referencing specific moments or instances that raised red flags to you. If several of your other friends have also pointed out some negative things, mention those too. However, *always* speak to her kindly and respectfully. She'll likely already be hurt by the fact that her crush might not be right for her, so you should always be supportive.

Listen to her thoughts without interruption

After you've explained yourself, let her express her thoughts on the situation without you cutting in to talk. Ask your bestie what she does like about her crush/SO, if she has noticed the things you're bringing up and how she's feeling about this situation. She may offer a different perspective, context or another side of the story that you were previously unaware of. It's important that you listen to all of these.

Remind her that you're always there for her

Lastly—but most importantly—let your bestie know that you'll always be there to support her. As her friend, you always want what's best for her and what will make her happy. During relationship troubles, your support and friendship will mean so much to her!

Have any more tips? Let us know @girlslifemag on Twitter!

Slider image via @annacathcart | All GIFs via GIPHY

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by Jinny Kim | 11/12/2021
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