Why Wait to Date?


There’s this guy who's a year older than me. He likes me, and I like him, but he wants to wait until we're in high school together to ask me out.  My problem is, I really just want him to ask me out now!

Hey girl, it can be super hard when schools are splitting you up. This guy has a valid reason to stay in the friend zone: Distance can be hard for a relationship, especially when only one of you is in high school. But you have a good reason to give this relationship a go: You both like each other now, and you know it. Things will be weird if you don’t, because there’s that “what if.” The move to make now? Talk it over. Let this guy know how you feel.

One of Two Ways

Before you talk, it’s important you think over what YOU really want. There are risks involved with getting into a romantic relationship (or even just dating) as well as staying where you are, and it’s important that you consider them. Make a pro/con list and think of what’ll happen. Example: you stay friends, things are awkward. One of you may lose feelings for the other before your freshman year of high school. Alternately, you become a couple and the distance is too much for you two to handle and you break up. These are possible downsides, but there are upsides to consider, too. Like all that built-up energy that could make you first date amazing when you enter freshman year.

How to Start the Convo

When it comes to bringing up this touchy topic, it’s important to do it at the right time and in the right place. Let this guy know you want to talk to him about something in private. And then just be frank: Ask him what’s going on with your relationship? Tell him how you really feel, that you want to go out with him (if you still feel that way after the pro/con list) and explain why.

Listen

Hear out what your guy has to say and ask if there’s a compromise. Maybe you take it slow and have a trial date. Maybe you date only on weekends. Be open to his ideas and he’ll be open to yours. It’s all about finding the middle ground.

Remember that in the end it takes two people to have a relationship. By telling this guy how you really feel in private, you’re not only taking a big step toward solving your problem but you’re establishing the foundation of any good relationship: strong communication.
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by Alyssa Bailey | 2/1/2016
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