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ADVICE | ALL ABOUT YOU | GIRL TALK

39 Comments | Add Yours

GIRL TALK: Help! I'm A Stress Mess

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Okay, I feel hopeless. My life is a mess. I couldn’t be more confused. I am hopeless at keeping my room clean (which doesn’t help diminish my stress), I’m a horrible procrastinater,(doing it as I type), and I can’t for the life of me figure out my own feelings. I am an unpopular homebody with awful people skills. If I didn’t have the people that are in my life I would… I don’t know what I’d do. So my question is… how do I get my life in order, I guess? ‘Cause I know if I do that that will help with the other things. Stress is probably my main thing. So help please!

-Kelsey'

Hey Kelsey,

Every Monday, my mantra is “Today I am going to get my life together.” Of course I never completely succeed, but it’s the attempt that counts right? Managing your life is a combination of multiple steps, it doesn’t just happen over night. The first thing you need to do is take a deep breath, nothing in this world is unmanageable.

In order to start getting things under control, the first thing you need to do is give yourself a tidy place to work things out in. I just cleaned my desk and put away laundry last night, my room looks almost inhabitable. By getting rid of old papers, left over candy wrappers, and reducing clutter in general, you open your personal space up. Surprisingly, a lack of complete chaos in your room will actually make you feel less overwhelmed and more motivated to tackle larger issues.

As far as procrastination goes… that’s a super hard habit to squash. Break the habit now! The older you get the more things get piled on. When you think about it, whatever you are putting off doing ( homework, walking the dog, doing the dishes) has to get done by the end of the day. You may as well do it the minute you get home and have the rest of the evening to rock out, than bumble around doing anything to avoid what it is that you absolutely have to do. Your best bet is to force yourself to sit down and get whatever it is you need done, done. It will be slow moving at first, but like anything, practice makes a habit and soon you wont think anything of it….not to mention the free time you will have on your hands to spend time with buds or do whatever it is that tickles your fancy.

Once you have removed the clutter from your space, have mastered a reasonable time schedule that allows you to complete your necessary obligations, you can then focus on your social life makeover. Reminder, there is nothing wrong with being a homebody…so you prefer vegging out with a small posse of peeps rather than being a ragin’ rocker chic…So what!?! Different strokes for different folks.

I know what its like to be socially awkward, it’s the story of my life. I have found that as hard as it is to muster up the courage to say hi to someone, it’s a lot harder sitting home by yourself . Start off by making yourself appear open. Smile at people, say hi, you don’t need to have an hour long convo with people right off the bat, but make yourself look inviting. As nervewracking as it may be, you should make a conscious effort to participate in social events that you wouldn’t usually go to. Round up your best buds and go to a school basketball game or meet up with some kids for ice cream afterschool. You have to put yourself out there in order to get results. Once you put yourself in social positions, awkwardness will subside.

Life can get completely out of hand sometimes. It happens to everyone. You need to focus on the little things you CAN fix rather than the big things that are more difficult to handle. If you take a few small steps in organizing your life and put some effort into making yourself an approachable person, you will absolutely see results and feel like a million bucks.

Hang In There!
Jana

POSTED ON 3/22/2007 11:42:49 AM

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39 Comments | Add Yours
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I am always sooooo nervous about everything and some of my frends call me a worry wart!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHAT SHOULD I DO ???????????????????????

report

by Kelly on 3/25/2007 1:13:17 PM

 
 

Kelsey- Also, if you have a spring break or something like that coming up, take a vacation. Relax. Foget about everything that's stressing you out. Focus on having fun. You'll feel a whol lot better, trust me. :smile:

report

by Maria on 3/24/2007 7:39:21 PM

 
 

stress is a bad thing to have and it can be frustrating. its up to you thiought to eliminate this stress. this is bad comin from the worst procrasinator in the world, but try getting things like home work and projects done as soon as you get them. i hope you werent considering suicide! that would be horrible! as for being an unpopular homebody, just put yourself out there. make it a goal to introduce yourself to 5 new people a day! and dont you ever pretend to be someone you are not! it will come back and bite you in the butt! its normal to feel out of control at this stage in your life but making friends and eliminating stress will help with that.

report

by millie on 3/24/2007 6:27:59 PM

 
 

Ashley- Oh sorry! That was supposed to say Maria instead of Annoymous :oops:

report

by Maria on 3/24/2007 3:31:01 PM

 
 

Ashley- Plus, it's hard to not care about what other people think of you, but sometimes it best to somehow ignore it. I know it hurts your feelings, but maybe one thing you could do to help with that is to explain to your friend that theres not much you can do about it and if she could lay off a little it would make you feel a lot better. And maybe you could ask her if she could help you stand up for her with everyone else teasing you. Sometimes people tend to "back off" when they're faced with more than one person defending another person.

report

by Annonymous on 3/24/2007 3:30:19 PM

 
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