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ADVICE | ALL ABOUT YOU | GIRL TALK

48 Comments | Add Yours

GIRL TALK: From Shy To Social!

outgoing.jpg

Ok, so here is the problem. I'm really quiet and I want to be more outgoing. I see these girls who are so talkative and I want to get out of my shell and be like them. Also, there is this guy in my Spanish class. We used to sit next to each other and he talked to me all the time. He would always forget his book and so we would always partner up. I'm not sure if he likes me and I need advice on how to get his attention since I am shy. Thanks so much!!!

-Pinky'

Hola Pinky. I'm sorry to say this, but there is no easy way to be outgoing. You just have to get out of your comfort zone and put yourself out there. I know it sounds really scary, but I promise overtime you'll loosen up. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect. The more and more you're in these uncomfortable situations, the less and less uncomfortable they will be.

If you find it too hard to completely lay yourself out to the public, then take baby steps. Start off with your Spanish cutie for example. Next time your in class, why don't you strike up a convo for a change. Just a playful, "You forgot your book again?" -OR- "Do anything fun this weekend?", can start off a lengthy convo. The more you get to know him and the better your conversations go, the better your relationship with each other will get. He obviously doesn't hate you because he partners up and chats with you all the time. So take over the reigns and start letting loose.

Things to remember:

No matter how comfortable other people seem in their own skin, everyone has insecurities. Even those girls who are talkative and outgoing have moments when they don't feel too hot. So you're not alone, although you may feel like you are.

Most people are nice. A lot of people may have an intimidating front, but if you talk to them, you'll realize how open they are to get to know you. Even the meanest of people will at least respond to your question. So don't be afraid to approach them, you'll be surprised how willing they'll be to talk.

If you go into something w/ a negative attitude, you're going to have negative results. So don't approach people with a "oh they'll think I'm weird" attitude. Pump yourself up. You're a great girl, I'm sure your friends and family can attest to that, so have that in mind.

Hugs,
Jiae

POSTED ON 4/20/2007 1:01:45 AM

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48 Comments | Add Yours
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Is anyone on???????

report

by Hayden on 4/21/2007 2:05:47 PM

 
 

Thanx I am random. :grin:

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by Hayden on 4/21/2007 2:03:02 PM

 
 

lol, hayden, random about the sailing! i like sailing too!

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by mads on 4/21/2007 12:50:47 PM

 
 

I luv sailing except it sometimes messes up ur hair!

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by Hayden on 4/21/2007 12:39:07 PM

 
 

Pinky~

I am a very (VERY!) outgoing chickie, soo maybe I can shed some light on this sitch. See, I've seen sooo many shy girls come out of their shell. One year I didn't even notice them, the next they are all out there.

I have to say, my craziness isn't always quite... pleasing... to my bffs. In fact they usually tell me to use my "inside voice" because I bug them so much. But, uh, yea, this isn't about me, let's not focus on that for now...

You may be feeling trapped with the people you already know. So you need to meet some new people - then you can change into a bright, lovable, friendly girl. So definitely go an join some clubs! Even if they don't seem so rockin' awesome to you at first glance, the first step of being outgoing and talkative is trying something new, so try something you wouldn't ordinarily go for - wheel throwing, volleyball, newspaper, anything. Meet the girls on that team and start out loud and happy. Everyone loves an optimistic chick!

As for that Spanish cutie, seems to me that he has a thing for you just the way you are. So don't go all extreme on him - no need to be louder than a fire engine! Just, like Jiae said, ask about his weekend or something you know he likes to do. Make short jokes, and be a little more flirty. If you're REALLY feeling brave enough (I haven't gotten to this stage yet...) say "Hey, wanna go after school to that smoothie place and hang out?" Make it sound casual. You can't go wrong with that!

Good luck!

report

by refrigeratedrubberbands on 4/21/2007 12:14:07 PM

 
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