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ADVICE | ALL ABOUT YOU | GIRL TALK

48 Comments | Add Yours

GIRL TALK: From Shy To Social!

outgoing.jpg

Ok, so here is the problem. I'm really quiet and I want to be more outgoing. I see these girls who are so talkative and I want to get out of my shell and be like them. Also, there is this guy in my Spanish class. We used to sit next to each other and he talked to me all the time. He would always forget his book and so we would always partner up. I'm not sure if he likes me and I need advice on how to get his attention since I am shy. Thanks so much!!!

-Pinky'

Hola Pinky. I'm sorry to say this, but there is no easy way to be outgoing. You just have to get out of your comfort zone and put yourself out there. I know it sounds really scary, but I promise overtime you'll loosen up. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect. The more and more you're in these uncomfortable situations, the less and less uncomfortable they will be.

If you find it too hard to completely lay yourself out to the public, then take baby steps. Start off with your Spanish cutie for example. Next time your in class, why don't you strike up a convo for a change. Just a playful, "You forgot your book again?" -OR- "Do anything fun this weekend?", can start off a lengthy convo. The more you get to know him and the better your conversations go, the better your relationship with each other will get. He obviously doesn't hate you because he partners up and chats with you all the time. So take over the reigns and start letting loose.

Things to remember:

No matter how comfortable other people seem in their own skin, everyone has insecurities. Even those girls who are talkative and outgoing have moments when they don't feel too hot. So you're not alone, although you may feel like you are.

Most people are nice. A lot of people may have an intimidating front, but if you talk to them, you'll realize how open they are to get to know you. Even the meanest of people will at least respond to your question. So don't be afraid to approach them, you'll be surprised how willing they'll be to talk.

If you go into something w/ a negative attitude, you're going to have negative results. So don't approach people with a "oh they'll think I'm weird" attitude. Pump yourself up. You're a great girl, I'm sure your friends and family can attest to that, so have that in mind.

Hugs,
Jiae

POSTED ON 4/20/2007 1:01:45 AM

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48 Comments | Add Yours
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I used to be really shy, until my friends helped me be more outgoing. I even like this boy who i want to just start talking to more.(we are good friends though)

report

by showstopper on 4/20/2007 4:43:59 PM

 
 

Thank you so much for the advice Jana. You've really helped. You moderators always make me feel better!


No problem Gabby-- I come from a gigantic family, its hard to stay on the same page with all your sibs

report

by Gabby(a.k.a half blonde) on 4/20/2007 3:18:59 PM

 
 

Hey Jana I know it wasn't accidental because she told me. I told her it upset me but she thought I was lying just so I could get attention from my parents. We've been mistreated by our brothers so bad and I try to tell my parents how i feel but my parents let her be inconciderate to me because she's the baby. I tried telling my mom how bad I felt but she grabbed my wrists really hard and almost broke them. How can I get though to my parents and my sis that I'm not just trying to get attention?


Hey Gabby-- it sounds like your parents arent being very open towards you and your feelings. I would keep reassuring her that you want to hang with her. You can do this by continually asking her to join you. Eventually she will get the hint

report

by Gabby(a.k.a half blonde) on 4/20/2007 3:12:08 PM

 
 

Moderator I need help. For the past few days people have been so inconsiderate of me. These 2 girls in my Fench class use me just so they can pass the class,my bus got me home late and I told them I couldn't be late so I could get to my vocal lessons. Well I got home late. Today my sister and I were planning to go to the movies this weekend. Well she told her friends that she would go to the movies with them knowing we were supposted to go. She always puts her friends before me! Shouldn't I come before her friends? How can I stop getting stepped on? I'm ready to cry!


Hey Gabby---- two of your problems can be fixed, one cannot. The bus driver isnt on your schedule, it runs the way it runs and cannot fix itself because you have someplace to be....its a total BUMMER. As for french, you are obviously super smart in your class, but dont let these girls mooch off of your brains. It isnt fair that they should benefit off of your hard work. Its hard to say no to people, but in this case you HAVE to, otherwise they are going to keep using you. And for your sister, its not cool that she blew you off, are you sure it wasnt just an accident. If she purposely made plans with her buds over you, then tell her it upsets you. She obviously doesnt know how valuable a sister is, I wish my sister had made an effort to hang out with me.

report

by Gabby(a.k.a half blonde) on 4/20/2007 2:52:28 PM

 
 

I'm an outgoing person. So the way to be outgoing is to join some clubs and make some new friends.

report

by Gabby(a.k.a half blonde) on 4/20/2007 2:45:10 PM

 
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