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Best Of: Friends

Sidekick Syndrome


Tired of being Invisible Girl? If you’re blending into the scenery, learn to stand out in the crowd!


Break the Rules
All your BFFs wear purple to the pool on Fridays or meet for smoothies on Tuesdays? Occasionally wear green on purple day or say, “Hey, who wants to meet at Taco Bell on Tuesday?” It proves you’re an individual, not a carbon copy.


Just Say It

Your BFF takes charge of all the plans? Instead of staying mum, make some noise. She wants to see Shrek the Third, when you’d rather go to Pirates 3? Say so! Scratch that—you’re sick of going to the theater. Every. Single. Saturday. You want to knock down some tenpins for a change of pace…so tell her.


Express Yourself

Just as you don’t have to go with the flow during chill time, same goes for organized activities. Why join dive team just because a BFF does? It’s not your thing, and your lame jackknives will pale in comparison to her perfect-10 swans. Instead, do whatever you excel in.


Step Outta the Circle

It’s totally OK to hang with girls outside your crew. Branching out into different social circles brings out other aspects of your personality. It demonstrates, even if only to yourself, that your identity is not dependent on a certain group of people. You can mix it up, right?


Don’t be Fooled

A bud constantly “borrows” clothes she doesn’t return, or hits you up for a slice at the snack bar but never treats you to so much as a stick of gum? She may be using you. Do not be relegated to doormat status. Next time your so-called friend asks for a favor, put your foot down and say, “What have you done for me lately?” Don’t expect an answer, but that should make a statement!


-LaToya Evans

BY ANDREA T. ON 5/1/2009 7:00:00 AM 14 COMMENTS

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14 READER COMMENTS

MODMODMODMODMODMOD
My parents are always talking about how I'm a follower and not a leader but I just don't know how to do that!! I mean, when I speak up for myself, I feel like people are thinking 'wow, SHE'S not a team player' and sometimes, I DO want to do that thing...just someone brought it out first. How do I speak up for myself without having to sound like a complete jerk!?

 

Hey girl, when you talk with others, if you just make sure that you are considering others' opinions and showing that you are listening, they'll listen to your opinion with respect without thinking that you are not a team player. Sharing your thoughts are important because it can even help the group. <3 Jeannie
Jeannie L.

tinxangel12 on 7/5/2009 7:31:36 PM

MOD MOD MOD
This realy is awesome.

shootingstar11 on 7/3/2009 10:09:26 PM

That is some awesome advice! It shows that you can stick to your friends and not be a wallflower.

shootingstar11 on 7/3/2009 10:08:35 PM

omg this totally spoke 2 me...awesome.thanks!

princess829 on 7/3/2009 8:54:12 PM

Would this count if your "best friend" was a mean girl? Like she was terrible to other girls, steals their boyfriends, and even makes it obvious she doesnt really like you, but is using you for your stuff? No, its not happening to me, but ive seen it happen a LOT

ihavetheglydephone on 6/19/2009 10:36:01 PM

good advice GL!!thanks

oxrachh44xo on 5/17/2009 10:55:17 PM

MOD
i have a problim where my friend (lets call her Jackie) told me she had a crush on Joey's (lets call her that) ex. Now I axxendentaly almost told Joey that someone has a crush on her ex. and she asked who and started guessing. So I lied but now I'm scared that when I go back to school Jackie will be mad that I told since I am the only one that knows, or Joey will find out i lied to her. Help!!!!!!!!!!!!










Hey girl,

Wow! You got a situation, but nothing that can't be handled. If "Jackie" asks if you told, be honest and explain that you didn't mean to let that slip. And if "Joey" finds out you lied, simply tell her that you panicked and wanted to protect your friend, but you're sorry you brought it up to begin with. The key to damage control is honesty and a calm tone - if you act calm, they will feel more comfortable and at ease, too. Hopefully it will all work out! Smile


~Alexa
alexa e.

Maddie12798 on 5/15/2009 7:30:49 AM

MOD I know this shouldt go hear but i couldt find any other place. This school year I became relly close to these two girls. I want to find a way to hang out with them this summer but i dodt know how. P.S. i am RELLY shy

 

Hey babe, talk about stuff you guys have in common and start off with, " Wouldn't it be great if we do that during the summer..?" and see where you go from there.<3 Sherryn D.

Sherryn D.

softball48 on 5/12/2009 9:43:54 PM

MOD..........MOD
i have similar prob. my friend always has to have things her way and when ever i try to say something
her other friends tell me to stop overreacting.and whenever i help her she never does anything to at least say thank you while she invites the other friend who she trashes behind her back to her house.
how do i tell her to step off in a way that wont make her go hysterical. hey girlies che




Hey babe, I would just tell her casually. Don't make it sound like you're accusing her, just tell her how you've been feeling. She prob doesn't even realize it's going on. Come off calmly and sincere and hopefully she'll get the message. 
katelin s.

earthyartist on 5/6/2009 7:01:01 PM

The second and third are exactly what I've needed to hear! Thanks, GL!

HeartOfSong on 5/6/2009 6:31:35 PM

some of these r really good especially hanging out with a new crowd! there r only 30 girls in my grade so its hard but ive been trying to because my 'friends' rnt all that nice!!!

pinkblink586 on 5/5/2009 5:44:02 PM

good advice... but i never blend in, unfortunately. =)

hyperpuppy on 5/3/2009 9:36:53 PM

that's coool

swimmergirl101 on 5/3/2009 1:51:53 AM

OMG this is awesome! The first and second will totally come in handy for me Smile

Check out my profile girls, and please leave a comment, thanks!

SportyGal on 5/1/2009 8:36:16 AM


    

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