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STYLE | BEAUTY | BEAUTY 911

188 Comments | Add Yours

My Mom Won’t Let Me Shave!

 

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It’s getting hot out and I’m ready to break out the shorts, but my leg hair is way too noticeable! I want to shave because it makes me super self-conscious, but my mom says I’m not allowed to. How can I convince her to let me fix this hairy situation?

 
We’ve been there, girl! It can be really tough when something’s buggin’ you this much and Mom just doesn’t seem to understand.
 
We’ve got great tips on how to approach the topic, what to say, and even how to take it if she says no.
 
Part 1—The Chat
 
If you’ve already asked and she’s said “no”, don’t bring it up every 5 minutes – she’ll just get frustrated. Instead, sit her down for a full convo on the subject, and don’t bring it up again for a few months – no matter what the outcome. Here are some ways to talk to her about it so that things come out in your favor!
 
Tip #1: Listen to Her
Tell your Mom you want to start shaving, and acknowledge that she doesn’t approve. Then ask her to explain why. Really pay attention – she might actually have some good reasons.
 
Tip #2: Explain Your Sitch
Politely tell her your reasons for wanting to shave. If other girls have made fun of you, or if it’s making you feel so uncomfortable that you won’t even wear shorts in 90-degree weather, she might be more likely to understand.
 
Tip #3: Be Ready to Compromise
No matter what Mom’s reasons for saying “no” are, you have to let her know that you were listening, and you’re willing to meet her halfway. Offer a compromise: you’ll only shave below your knees, or you’ll use a hair removal cream instead of shaving (so you don’t run the risk of cutting yourself). Her decision doesn’t have to be all or nothing...if you chat it out.
 
Tip #4: Give her Time
After the two of you have chatted, ask her to think it over before she makes a decision. Decide on a time when she’ll tell you, and (this part may be difficult) don’t ask her about it until then.
 
Part 2—The Decision
 
Now comes the (hopefully) good part…your mom will tell you whether or not you’re allowed to shave. If your conversation went well, you both listened to each other, and she understands that your reasons are good she’ll most likely let you. If she does, great! Make sure you include her in the process by asking for tips or a demonstration. If she says the dreaded “no,” here’s how to handle it:
 
Tip #1: Accept It
Tell her you understand her decision, and while it isn’t what you wanted, you’ll respect it. Even if you’re feelin’ totally bummed, you’re showing her how mature you are by not whining.
 
Tip #2: Try Again

After a month or two, approach the subject again. Make sure Mom knows that it’s a big deal to you and why. It also might help to gently remind her how mature you were about the rejection last time. You may have to repeat this cycle a few times, but be patient! She will eventually say yes.
 
Remember: NO BEGGING OR WHINING! If you handle the situation like the mature chica you are, she’ll be more likely to treat you like one.

-Lisa Brown

POSTED ON 5/28/2009 7:00:00 AM

POSTED IN shaving 101

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My mom won't let me shave because she says girls don't NEED to shave (which is probably true, but it's more attractive and if I don't then people will think I dont keep myself clean) and my mom doesn't shave (at least I've looked everywhere and can't find a razor) I'm 11, turning 12 in a few weeks. I remember at the beginning of 6th grade when we started PE girls would stare at my legs but not say anything and that made me feel self conscious. I've tried talking to my mom multiple times, even talked to my aunt who does shave her legs. My aunt told me that in Vietnam (where my mom was born/from) things are different and I've tried talking to my mom about that but she won't listen. At least my other friends who don't shave yet, their moms have given them a time, like when their period comes or a certain age but here my mom said NEVER. I can't go on with this until I'm 18! My brothers friends (girls) have just went behind their moms back and shaved but I don't want to decieve mine.

report

by RandomPanda1600 on 12/7/2012 5:02:13 PM

 
 



Mod mod??
Hey, I've asked my mom before three different times when I was in 6th grade, 7th, then 8th. She said no all three times!!! I'm scared I'm going to be denied again!!! How can I get over it????

 

Hey chica! If she says no, then you'll have to accept it, but you can keep asking every few months until she says yes.  Or if she says no again, ask her (nicely) if she can give you a specific time when you will be old enough.  xoxo 


Kate G.

report

by Daddy'sgrl12 on 8/13/2012 4:55:56 PM

 
 



Mod?
Well, for my mom, she doesn't need to shave at all since she was 18! That's when she had pneumonia so her body hair faded away and it doesn't grow back... :O So lucky, but she lets me wax not shave...is waxing a good thing because my mom approves it so I wax my underarm a lil bit caz it barely grows hair that much and my legs from my knees all the way down..I do that 1 every 2 months, it really works! Is that a bad thing to do???

 

Hey! Waxing isn't unhealthy to the best of my knowledge, just a lil uncomfortable sometimes haha!  


Helen S.

report

by Susmita24 on 6/25/2012 6:27:01 PM

 
 

My mom won't let me shave :'[
I Told her everything and she said: that my hair is going to grow faster and their going to look like a man if i keep shaving but she keeps saying no no no
IDK what to do now :'[ I Don't want to wear skirts, shorts and everyone even my bf is going to look at my hairy legs Frown
HELP ME!! Frown

report

by Rosie_Notperfect on 4/8/2012 12:30:21 PM

 
 

MOD! would it work just to have this conversation through e-mail with my mom? because that worked when i asked her about doing my underarms. Also, she likes to know the facts on things before she decides, like reading the ingredients on juices over before she buys it.

 

Hey chica, It's usually easiest and best to have big conversations in person (less chance for miscommunication).  But if e-mail works for you and your mom, that's fine too!

Marie H.

report

by spicyllamachick2120 on 5/16/2011 8:51:41 PM

 
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