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My sister is in ninth grade and plays varsity soccer. She also runs track and has broken four school records—and this is only her fourth meet ever! I like sports and all, but I get really frustrated when I’m compared to her.

She practices soccer three hours a day and then runs four miles. I’m expected to do all that now, too. My sister is really nice to me, but all our coaches think I can be just as good as she is and push me way too hard. How can I get everyone to stop comparing me to her?

—Not-So-Great Soccer Player

Even though people compare you to your sister, don’t torture yourself. I’m sure you have plenty of your own talents and goals. Find something else you like doing.

Do some exploring to find out what YOUR natural talents are. This way you’ll have the freedom to be your own star. Instead of worrying about being a record-breaker, just enjoy the process of discovering more about yourself. As for your sister and soccer coaches, let them know you love the team and will happily cheer them on…from the stands!

TELL US NOW! Need advice ASAP? Click the purple SEND A QUESTION button to ask our very own Lucky for help!

BY CAITLIN R. ON 9/17/2009 7:00:00 AM 56 COMMENTS

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when i ask for an aim my mom doesnt really want to give me it because she think i might talk to boy what should i do

sharitz on 11/11/2009 7:46:06 PM

MOD MOD MOD
I'm depressed. Is it normal? Will it go away? What can I do to stop it?

It's normal to feel sad but if you're depressed, you need to talk to someone. Talking it out is the best solution. It won't go away on its own. A friend, guidance counselor, teacher, family member, doc: theyre all there for ya. Youre not alone. Best,

Miliana B.

exuberant_emily on 11/1/2009 6:35:26 AM

MOD MOD MOD MOD okay, so im 12 years old and i still have my baby fat, and at my old school i knew alot of people who were like me, but im going to a new school and all the girls are sooooo skinny!! and i feel really self confident around them! what should i do?? thank you!

Hey girl! Don't worry; I'm sure you're fab the way you are! You're still growing so you will still be changing!

-Taeler

Taeler L.

hockeygirl232 on 10/18/2009 11:56:13 PM

MOD
I have alot of realy close friends. In that group is it ok to have a best friend?

Hey girl, it definitely is. In fact, you can have more than one best friend. Don't think you've gotta limit your BFFs!

xoxo

Alyssa B.

lulu333233 on 10/14/2009 10:46:59 PM

1. Say ur name 10x
2. Say ur mom's name 5x
3. Say ur crushes name 3x
4. then paste this to 4 other quizs, if you do this your crush will kiss you on the nearest friday

Pengwinzrule12 on 10/7/2009 8:39:55 PM

1. Say ur name 10x
2. Say ur mom's name 5x
3. Say ur crushes name 3x
4. then paste this to 4 other quizs, if you do this your crush will kiss you on the nearest friday

Pengwinzrule12 on 10/7/2009 8:38:49 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD help me! my best friend and i r really competitive. she always beats me in everything! makeup, hair, trends, you name it!!! i get really mad, but were still friends. what should i do????????

Hey girly, let your BFF know your friends not frenemies. Tell her you love hanging out with her, not competing with her. It's okay to be a little competitive with your friends at times, but not so much so, that that's all your friendship is based on.

Lynae P.

LMann96 on 9/25/2009 11:20:46 PM

***MOD***MOD***MOD***
i have two questions. 1. I was mad at this guy friend but then we had this long heart to heart. But we havent talked since then and i wont see him in person until tomorrow or next friday. I dont know what to say to him cuz i dont want to forgive him too easily cuz he was such a jerk to me. What do you think? 2. Im fat. I way 109 ibs. And im 5 ft. Tall..my doctor says im not overweight but i think i am. How can i loose around 5-8 pounds?

Hey girl, I don't know the full details on your first Q, but my suggestion is to be civil to him. Think hard about it. Were you over-reacting? Was he? Do you miss him or his friendship? Sometimes taking a breath and letting emotions cool down a bit can really help give your friendship a lift. As for Q2, you're NOT fat, girlie, at all. Trust the doc on this one (and me too!), you're totes fine. You don't need to lose any weight and know you are BEAUTIFUL. Girls come in many shapes and sizes and they're all gorgeous -- you are too! So don't worry about the numbers and realize your body is growing. You'll be fine, girlie, just the way you are!

xoxo

Alyssa B.

crazyshortie13 on 9/23/2009 9:35:00 PM

ANYONE!!!!!
any ideas of how to style my hair? other than straighten scrunch tousle you know the normal....i just want something new...i have every single product you can imagine and it doesnt matter how long it takes!!

xohollistercalixo on 9/22/2009 8:17:20 PM

Wow this is Soooo similar yet so different from me!!! I am an all honors student and I had the highest grade average in my school last year and I do really well in sports and I am an advanced violinist, but my younger brother is a decent student and a BRILLIANT guitar player and about as good as I am at sports. My parents pay Sooo much attention to him and everything he does! My mom even asked my coach to give me a ride home because my parents decided to watch my brother's game instead of mine! They didn't even split up to watch the game like most parents! Then, they're always bragging about how amazing my brother is at music and how special that is. They have Never said anything like that about me. Now he is Super popular at my school and my parents are all proud of him! My parents know all of his friends, their parents, and even everyone on his soccer team and their parents! They don't know half of my friends, don't remember any of my friends' parents (however many times they've come to pick my friends up from my house) and their memories of my soccer team are terrible (not like they've been to enough games to remember anyway) UGH sorry I had to rant.

soccerbee683 on 9/21/2009 7:53:16 PM

i am the oldest sib, so i have nothing to live up too.

xmonkeybrain10 on 9/20/2009 3:52:13 PM

MOd I lIKE this guy "BOB" and he's really nice and we are friends I want to ask him out but he cheated on his GF and I am afraid that he will cheat on me too, He is really nice and we like all the same things. My heart tells me to go ahead but my head tells me to wait! Should I ask him out? and how can I go about doing that?

Hey chicky, you should go for it! Just because he did something bad to another girl doesn't mean he's going to do it to you. Maybe he learned his lesson and the situation could've been different. Walk up to him and ask him out casually. You could say hey

"That new scary movie, just came out you wanna see it?" or "Hey, I'm going skating this weekend, wanna join me?"

Lynae P.

ginny111 on 9/20/2009 2:57:30 PM

Come and check out Club PARTYGIRLS 2day!!!

Club PARTYGIRLS is new and jobs r still available so come check it out and see if ur PARTY side is ready 4 this!!!!!!!

crazy-is-me on 9/20/2009 1:55:38 PM

I have two older sisters that's what it's really like with the one whose closest to my age. She a cheerleader,last year was one of the star basketball players, shes great at clogging(which I also do) and she really pretty gets like all the guys, shes a freshman and I think shes currently dating a senior and shes a freshman in high school, and smart! My older sister is really pretty 2 and smart and then theres me...

annaclare on 9/20/2009 11:02:12 AM

Oh. That stinks. People shouldn't compare you to your sister!
************************************************
CLUB CREATIVITY IS NOW OPEN! IF YOU ARE INTERESTED PLEASE FEEL FREE TO JOIN. JUST CLICK ON MY NAME or SEARCH lasagna or SEARCH Club Creativity. The club is under lasagna's profile. I don't know how to change it to something else, sorry.

~lasagna~
Club Creativity

lasagna on 9/19/2009 4:28:36 PM

puh-lease!!!

i have 7 older siblings and
1 sis was best at track in the state
1 was killer basketball player
3 bros wrestled varsity in 7 grade
1 sis was best at volleyball in our school histoy
1 sis was a killer lax player

im seriously not kidding!

oh and 3 of my sibs were validvictorians

peacelovecandy on 9/19/2009 12:33:01 PM

MOD MOD MOD
i have brown eyes with long eyelashes. i have brown eyeliner, but i wanted to get a color like dark blue or purple. What color do you think would look best?

Purple with brown eyes is nice! Compliments the browns in your eyes perfectly!

Megan R.

animaluver438 on 9/18/2009 10:42:07 PM

Allie so lately like almost every week since the second week of school the guy i've liked has looked at me first instead of me looking at him first he did it again today he turned around and looked my way when he could of all this week cause i'm usually always behind him and his friends.I've liked him over a year and he also knows i like him.Mean Something?
Kayla xoxo

Maybe! Boys are tough to read but have you tried chatting with him? Start up a convo and see how he reacts. If he seems into talking with you, he may be crushing! The fact that he keeps glancing at you could mean something! You never know til you chat him up!

Megan R.

daughtry fan on 9/18/2009 8:58:28 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!! After I shave, I have red bumps all over them. What are they? How do I get rid of them?

Hey babe,

It's razorburn - it happens when you don't moisturize enough. Be sure to use shave gel or something else to moisturize your legs while you shave and maybe even some lotion when you're done.

xoxo Allie

Allie S.

bombergirl97 on 9/18/2009 8:49:37 PM

MOD MOD

bombergirl97 on 9/18/2009 8:47:19 PM

Thanks Caitlin!!!!

AcePrincessGal on 9/18/2009 8:01:46 PM

*MOD MOD MOD MOD*
refering to my previous Q. wer aren't really close friends she just someone to talk to and i might talk to him myself but idk its just really really hard for me to approach guys. i really wanna go out with him tho.

Hey babe,

In that case, try to think of something to say before you actually talk to him. That way you'll be less stressed about what to say and you only have to worry about when you're going to say it.

xoxo Allie

Allie S.

blondie123abc on 9/18/2009 6:40:01 PM

oh i meant not hating anyone! whoops!

happygurl5922 on 9/18/2009 6:32:43 PM

MOD
at school we had to write a journal about someone we hated. i didn't hate anybody and i still don't i'm not the type of person who makes a hate list(thats what some people did and those lists were long!) i kinda feel stupid for hating anyone, should i?

Hey babe,

I think it's great that you don't hate anybody. There's a lot of hate in the world already, after all.

xoxo Allie

Allie S.

happygurl5922 on 9/18/2009 6:31:58 PM

i know this sounds bad for this discussion, but man, that is really impressive of your sister, especially since she's only a freshmen. i know it really sux, but do stuff you like to do.

shopper_babe on 9/18/2009 6:25:22 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD
ok so i'm in my middle school band and we are opening up our hischools competion jamboree tomorrow and the guy i like is in band 2. i really wanna talk to him but i have a friend that likes him 2 and she's more comfortable around guys and she said she was gonna talk to him also. i'm really shy but i liked him 1st. i'm thinkn about gettin my bro to tell him i like him cuz they both play sax. but idk wat should i do?

Hey babe,

First of all, I think you shouldn't ask your brother, because it can be awkward to get your sibs involved in your love life. You should talk to your friend though and figure out if both of you liking the same guy is going to hurt your friendship. If it is, you're both better off leaving this guy alone. Your friendship will probably last longer than a relationship and you don't want to risk it for a guy!

xoxo Allie

Allie S.

blondie123abc on 9/18/2009 6:03:16 PM

Thanks Mod!

Jessicamustang on 9/18/2009 5:40:12 PM

Mod Mod MOd Mod MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!
One of my besties lies a lot, and I find it hard to trust her. One day she told me that she heard 2 guys talking about me and heard them saying that they like me. How do I find out if she is telling the truth and the guys really do like me?

Hey babe,

Even if she lies about a lot of things, is this the kind of thing she usually lies about? If not, then she's probably telling the truth. You can also talk to her about it and let her know that you won't be mad if she was lying, you just really want to know if it's true.

xoxo Allie

Allie S.

soccer28q on 9/18/2009 5:38:53 PM

MOD!!!!
Okay I hjust met this really nice guy and well I like him but he just cheated on his girl friend. We are in 8th and he kissed a freshman(high school) he keeps sayin in was a accident but I'm not sure. Should I ask him out or do you think he might cheat on me!!! P.S He is really sweet and likes all the things I do!!

Hey babe,

If a guy has cheated on a girl before it's usually not a good sign. Wait for at least a month and get to know him better, then you'll know more about what kind of guy he really is and if he'll cheat on you.

xoxo Allie

Allie S.

ginny111 on 9/18/2009 5:27:54 PM

MOD MOD MOD...
I won the august week four giveaway and I was wondering when it was supposed to come....who should I contact and when? Well thanks and have a nice day

Hey babe,

Keep being patient until the end of the month and if you still haven't gotten your prize go to the "Contact Us" link at the top of the page and you'll be able to let someone know what's going on.

xoxo Allie

Allie S.

Jessicamustang on 9/18/2009 5:11:41 PM

is anyone modding? because i really need some help...

Hey girl,

What's going on?

Caitlin R.

KSG2013 on 9/18/2009 4:29:04 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!
I have Drama Club auditions coming and I want the part with a solo. My friend Olivia wants the solo too, and she is better than me, but I have a larger range than her. She also got a solo last year. They are making us sing "My Country Tis of Thee" for the auditions and I don't like that song. My voice doesn't go with it. I was going to bring my own CD of "I Dreamed A Dream" (Les Miserables=Broadway) to sing when everyone is gone, but I don't know what to do! HELP!!!!

Hey girl,

Unforts, you probably have to follow the rules this time around. Sigh. Practice, practice, practice and I'm sure you'll be amazing on the big day.

Caitlin R.

AcePrincessGal on 9/18/2009 3:35:49 PM

I feel like you.
MOD MOD!
Im always compared to my 10th grade sister. She's on the cross country team, was on varsity flag football in the 9th grade, and is going to make the soccer team. I always feel like my parents seem to love her more (I know thats not true) and treat her better because she's good at all those things when I'm more of an artsy and smarter girl (I've been getting straight A's all my life.). Plus she's super pretty. Every guy seems to fall for her. She has blonde hair and green/hazel eyes and every guy seems to be attracted to her. I know inner beauty is more important than outer beauty but I still want to feel pretty and stop living in my sister's shadow. What can I do to feel more proud of myself, for my parents to feel more proud, and how do i get out of my sister's shadow?

Hey Girl! I completely understand where you're coming from. I have a sister who is really close to me in age too and I would say that we've both experienced what you're going through at different times. The relationship you have with your sister is one that is very unique- it is easy to become jealous of her because you love her and see only the best in her, but you should listen to yourself when you say that you're both very different. The fact that you each have your own identities is soo important! I know it may be hard to imagine, but I would bet that there are times when your sister envy's how artistic and smart you are, and even though you may not believe it- how beautiful you are too. Although it may seem like your parents are more proud of your sister, I'm sure that is not the case. It may be helpful to call a family meeting and share with your rents and sis how you're really feeling. The best way to get out of your sister's shadow is to keep being the wonderful you that you are<3

Katarina E.

Kaela :0) on 9/18/2009 2:31:35 PM

hey! If ur more book smart or "musical" talented, go 4 more of thos things 2 do after skool (unless ur hooked w/ sports) and show every1 u like and r awesome @ "wutever" and not (wut it seems like) ur superstar sis! Hope this helps....?

Gabster

gabster08 on 9/18/2009 7:08:08 AM

yikes, that sounds really hard. am i ever glad that i'm the older sister, and that i don't have to work up to anyone's expectations!

sunflowerlicious on 9/17/2009 9:17:45 PM

Just say something like "Oh you must be thinking of my sister!Yeah we are two COMPLETELY different people, in case you haven't noticed."

But if you don't like this well then don't try it

fashionista305 on 9/17/2009 7:44:15 PM

just be yourself! dont listen to those who compare you!! and your sister is nice to you and maybe you could practice soccer with her if your yard sometime or go on a short jog once in a while!

misher4 on 9/17/2009 7:39:53 PM

The same thing is happening to me but in a different way. My sister is wicked pretty she gets all the guys and they all like her, she is really good at cheerleading, she has perfect pearly white teeth, and she has.....boobs, lol. I just feel like I am not special at all.

glittergirl24 on 9/17/2009 7:34:46 PM

MOD MOD MOD!!!!
could i wear an overnight pad to school for the whole day and change it when i get home?

Hey girl, it's always best to change your pad at least once during the school day. Try doing it halfway (during lunch for instance) and when you get home. That way you're nice 'n clean.

xoxo

Alyssa B.

cnell411 on 9/17/2009 7:25:56 PM

yeah that's good advice u and ur sister are 2 different ppl people shouldn't expect u guys 2 be like twins! good luck!!!

check out my profile, i give advice!!!!

♥♥♥ hit.the.surfs. ♥♥♥

hit.the.surfs. on 9/17/2009 7:15:16 PM

Wow that must be pretty tough, me and my sister arent like that. We're also not like BFFs but still. I hope u find ur natural talent ;)

Check out my profile girls, and please leave a comment, thanks!

SportyGal on 9/17/2009 6:24:09 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There is girl in the grade below me that I hate so much and I think she wants to start a preschool drama with me. We were playing drama and she was on my same team, and when she would give a ball to someone (she's a bratty girly girl), she on purposly almost hits my head everytime. She also spreads rumors about me. She's nice to my friends, but not me. And when a new kid is in school, she's nice to them and it aggrivates me. I don't what to do. She's so mean, I want to switch schools SO bad!! What should I do?

Hey girl, whoa there, know it's not good to hate anyone. She may not be the nicest, but she's def not all bad; you've gotta remember that. Try this strategy though: "kill 'em with kindness." Be nice to this mean girl and chances are, she might not be so mean back. I know it's super hard, but you'll avoid a war and in the end be the bigger person. And who knows? After a while, that person may even end up being your BFF. Way unbelievable, right? Not so much. That happened to my bro -- it can happen to you too if you just give this girl a chance.

xoxo

Alyssa B.

bombergirl97 on 9/17/2009 5:54:47 PM

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CLUB GLAMOUROUS! on 9/17/2009 5:45:22 PM

One day you may be way ahead of her in something and people will look at you like you are the one with all the special talents. Things can change so I would just try to be you.

luckykel on 9/17/2009 5:28:56 PM

hey try being a sixth grader whos sister is in fashon merchandise boarding school in new york. thats all people talk about.

superchatty101 on 9/17/2009 5:16:32 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!!! Ok, so I have been thinking about death way too much lately. I'm really upset with myself!!! HELP!!! -Negative Nellie

Death is inevitable so enjoy life while you can, and don't think about it.

Olivia

Olivia A.

Smileygirl86 on 9/17/2009 4:04:44 PM

Aw that sucks. good advice !

Maddyrox92 on 9/17/2009 3:45:40 PM

that really must suck!!! (:

Becca13 on 9/17/2009 3:40:57 PM

MOD! My best friends are in the grade above me, so last year they had a different lunch than me. This year I sit with them for the first week of school, but another friend took up a stool (he is in their grade)and now they have no rrom for me. So I walked up and was like "Guess there's no room for me" and walked and sat at another table. Two of my three best friends have gotten over it, but one treats me worse than next-to-complete strangers, and she said in a text that she is "breaking up with you lol. I don't know how to say this, but I will talk to you tomorrow." So I tried to talk to her today and she bit my head off. I don't know what she meant, I told her that if she did not want me around she could have just said so and she texted that I was overreacting and not to worry. So what do I do?

If she is acting this way to you over a seating rearrangement at your lunch table something is wrong. Talk to her and let her know how you feel. If she doesn't want to be friends with you over something so small shes not a true friend.

Olivia

Olivia A.

ilovetwilight on 9/17/2009 3:10:21 PM

Oh. This is what happens to me.
Except in school, and stuff.
She's, like, a genius, and has a HUGE social life.

So yeah. I knwo what you're going through. Its okaayy. Just be proud of who you are and dont let all this annoy you.

Twilight_LovE_Fanpire01 on 9/17/2009 11:55:41 AM

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