The Problem is Me!

I can't stop feeling guilty!

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I have this problem with guilt. Since first grade, I randomly feel extremely guilty about something I did in the past, embarrassing moments, etc. It's awful because they just randomly pop up in my head and it takes me a while, from as little as hours to as much as days or even weeks, to stop feeling like such an awful person.

I don't know anyone else this happens to. The only consistency about my guilt issue is that it usually starts up when I'm bored. It's like I can't turn it off! I'm starting to think that this is my form of self-harm. Instead of cutting I'm punishing myself emotionally.

Please help! I don't want to spend the rest of my life feeling so awful.

-Pleading Guilty

Ugh, guilt is an awful feeling and it can be so self-destructive. But, like with most things, the first step to feeling better is admitting that you have a problem. So, congratulations for taking that first step. Now we’re going to get rid of that guilt!

Bust that boredom!

You said you start to feel guilty when you’re bored. This makes sense because your brain has nothing to think about except how awful you feel and that’s not cool. The easiest way to fix this prob? Do something constructive.

If you like writing, start penning a short story. If you’re into art, head outside and paint the sunset or colorful fall leaves. Or join an after-school club or sport. The key is to stay busy, busy, busy. The more you have to do, the less time you have to feel guilty.

Get happy...not guilty!

Next, write down everything you feel guilty about on a piece of paper. Read the list, tear it up into little pieces and then throw it away. Now make a list of all of your great qualities, such as your sense of humor, killer math skills and crazy dance moves. You deserve to feel fabulous about yourself and your guilt is only bringing you down. When you start to feel guilty again, pull out this list and look at how wonderful you are. You go, girl!

Lots of love,

L’Oreal

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BY CAITLIN R. ON 10/26/2009 7:00:00 AM 64 COMMENTS

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~Pleading Guilty
I would like to tell you two things. 1. just don't be bored. Whenever you're starting to get bored crack open a book, surf the net, spend some time with your friends and fam!!!! Also, no ones perfect. People always do things that they regret but thats life for ya! Once you do something apoligize right away!
~laslivelaughlove

laslivelaughlove on 3/17/2010 6:38:09 PM

mod mod mod
k, so i'll admit i've done something pretty bad and the guilt is just killing me, like not a day goes by where i don't think about it. it happened about a year and a half ago, and since then, that person has died, so it's not like i can apologize to them anymore. i haven't talked to a soul about it, cuz i don't know whether my friends would understand. i've tried the whole writing it down thing, and it didn't really work. and it's killing me so bad that i've come really close to cutting myself, but i didn't because someone walked in the room just then. i feel as if my relationships with other people are falling apart cuz i have such a big secret. i don't know what to do anymore. please help!!!

Hey girl! Sounds like you might need to talk to someone about it. Try your school's counselor... if he/she isn't a help, they can refer you to a therapist. There are ways of healing and moving past guilt and sadness, and I suggest you do that! Good luck!

xoxo

liz

Liz L.

musicme on 12/14/2009 9:06:39 PM

Hey.... Sometimes I feel like that too. What I do, is I say in my mind "Why let this ruin my day?" and then it gets out of my mind!

zeus11 on 11/28/2009 11:19:50 PM

ya i get that way too but my problem is i don't know what to do when something makes me feel guilty and then I can't fix what idid b4 the consequences come...... its happening rite now

jenna1397 on 11/25/2009 2:14:18 PM

I HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM ITS NOT FUN.

Desi k on 11/22/2009 8:05:17 PM

i KNO how u feel cause ive done things in my life i regret. i cant seem to forget. the process forgive and forget doesnt apply 2 me.

breakawaygirl77 on 11/22/2009 4:59:12 PM

I do the exact same thing. I dwell on the past and it is just annoying. I feel ya!

hcchic on 11/17/2009 1:40:55 PM

MOD I have the exact same problem... But worse. I look back at the times when I hadn't started getting mature and think about how bad I am. I even miss when I was 5 or 6, before anything complicated A.k.a SCHOOL happened I tried sharing it with my BFF but all she did was laugh. I don't wanna share it with my mom. Please help. Thanks ;)

Hey girl! Try writing it down so it's out of your mind for a while. You might feel better getting it out and off your shoulders. Focus on your thing right now and try to not worry over the past!

-Taeler

Taeler L.

littlemissbunneh on 11/15/2009 9:29:02 PM

omg this is how i used to feel....when i was like in 5th grade i would swear so bad ( any word but the !!) and later that year the guilt finally caught up with me... i felt so bad and now the only bad word i say is ( not even that bad) and im in 7th grade lol and i used to feel really guilty for the things i did and i would tell my mom and it would be sooo awkward like once i had a dream ( it was inappropraite...idk y or how but it was)and for some reason i felt guilty so i told my mom.... talk about AWKWARD!!! Eryn G.

cutiepie4567 on 11/14/2009 3:43:36 PM

I used to have the same problem! I would feel gulity for things I did in the past. And it was like it would never go away, even if I forced myself to try and forget about them. But I started hanging out with new people, got into new activities that I love ,and i got a sweet bf, they all started to go away. I dont know how, really. I know how you feel, and try my advice if you want. I'm loving life!

annabanana21 on 11/6/2009 7:00:41 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD I have looked all over for the lyrics to One Time by Justin Beiber. I cannot find them anywhere! And my search engines are not working? Do you think you could type them or copy and paste them? Pretty please with a cherry on top?

Thx! xx

Hey girl! If your internet is working, your search engines should be fine. It might be that you had a typo, but if you type in "one time lyrics justin bieber," you'll get the results you're looking for. best, Kristen

Kristen Y.

wallofllamas on 11/1/2009 7:43:27 PM

Thanks Mod, Because that is one of the most watched movies at our sleepovers. And my friends and I think it is so funny and so romantic at the same time and that is why we have watched it so many times. The only other movies I think we have watched more at our sleepovers were Juno and some of the Harry Potter movies. My mom knows we watch it but if my dad knew how many times we have watched Forgetting Sarah Marshall, he would think we girls were crazy and guy obsessed.
Kristen Y.

luckykel on 11/1/2009 7:19:29 PM

Sometimes I feel the same way. I try to think of other things or go rake the leaves and listen to music.

LittleLover205 on 11/1/2009 10:36:53 AM

MOD MOD
I felt a little guilty because I like to watch a movie called Forgetting Sarah Marshall. And it is a movie my friends and I have watched a lot at sleepovers. But my mom doesnt have a problem with me and my friends watching it but I still sometimes feel guilty for liking it.
I am sure its because of some of the inappro parts of the movie and the main guy not wearing clothes a lot of the time in the movie but is it weird to feel like that even if my mom gave me approval?

Hey babe,

If your mom says it's okay for you and you really like the movie, then it's okay. It's up to your mom to decide what you're old enough to handle. But if you feel like it's a little old for you, consider the rating of a movie before you watch it next time. You've already seen this one, so there's no point feeling guilty about it.

xoxo Allie

ps: I love that movie

Allie S.

luckykel on 10/30/2009 4:36:24 PM

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cheytai on 10/29/2009 8:48:33 PM

OMG i have this same problem! I have such a terrible conscience.

cheytai on 10/29/2009 8:47:54 PM

i had a problem 2 from da past nd it pops in my head 4 sum reason [its weird]

mizzchikita14 on 10/29/2009 8:44:27 PM

hey im becka and i would love to share my story about what i had its the same thing but i let it go because it wuz worrining my life and i am so sorry about u because im sayin this ur heart hurts and uve got to let go and jornal or talk with someone u trust just try it ok u can come to me anytime ok ive g2g ok bye.

becca-thischristmas7 on 10/29/2009 2:00:25 PM

MODMODMOD
so one of my bffs is haveing a halloween party and half the school is going...including my crush

ive liked him since 6th grade and he knows it...and his friends and mine tell me he likes me back....im not sure if im gonna get enough guts to do it, but im thinking on telling him that i like him, how should i act and tell him?? when should i do it? were going trick or treating (for fun haha) and hangin at her house
thanks alot

thanks alot!!!!

Hey girl, I wouldn't tell him straight out you like him, but use the evening to hint it to him and flirt. Try trick-or-treating beside him. Talk to him at the party. Let him get to know you and see where it goes. You never know whether or not he might be trying to send those flirty signals too.

xoxo

Alyssa B.

bloo on 10/28/2009 10:50:31 PM

Yes, this happen to me to too! Even a ravenclaw agrees!!! A RAVENCLAW!

qwert on 10/28/2009 8:47:20 PM

Me too! And embarrassing moments run through my head over and over again, too.

rawrmeansi<3uindinosaur on 10/28/2009 6:42:32 PM

i have the same prob. but im MOSTLY pariniod bout things alot.

morgan.here on 10/28/2009 6:13:24 PM

ohhhh i hve dat prob... whenever im bored and start thinking, al i can feel is guilt. but it never goes away! and so wat helps me is doodling and *sigh* dare i say it, paying attention.

Punky Bunny Boo on 10/28/2009 3:26:54 PM

Yeah, sometimes I feel like that too. But when I do, I just start reading a book or shooting hoops or something, like L'Oreal said, do something constructive. Great advice!

frenchhornlover on 10/27/2009 9:06:57 PM

4 awhile thats happended 2 me 2. ill b lying in bed and ill suddenly think of something stupid i did and think "why did i do that?!" or "why did i say that?!"

PicturePerfect on 10/27/2009 8:31:11 PM

Hey girl you are NOT the only one who feels like this i am sure. Cause i do too sometimes. Like i always say sorry, and i don't know why, i just feel bad for some reason.
And like Abriella123 said you are probably the only one who remembers this embarrassing or bad or whatever stuff.
So don't think about it too much it hurts your head (or at least mine)
I would take L'Oreal's adivce.
Good luck.

ray ray on 10/27/2009 8:25:30 PM

my coomments
arent posting help idkhow to post to help withpeps props

chocalateluver on 10/27/2009 7:31:49 PM

chill you'll make mistake ur hole life so u cant be scared just laugh at the mistake its fine everone makes mistakes luv me lol

chocalateluver on 10/27/2009 7:08:23 PM

MOD! MOD! MOD! Okay so recently i found out my choir teacher was pregnant. appereantly she only my class too. i didnt know that and i accidently told someone in another class. the girl is really trustworthy and swears she won't tell a soul but we're twelve year old girls and secrets are impossible. i don't want to tell my choir teacher but I just feel so guilty. what can i do?

Hey girl! Well, I'm assuming if she told a few of you, she wouldn't mind others knowing. Just see how the next few days go and maybe she'll let more people know!

-Taeler

Taeler L.

GreenEyedBeauty12 on 10/27/2009 5:47:55 PM

Hey girl! She should def talk to someone. Be there for her as a friend to encourage her to go. It could turn into a major prob in her life so make sure she gets to talk to a professional.

-Taeler

Taeler L.

GreenEyedBeauty12 on 10/27/2009 4:56:55 PM

Sometimes that happens to me i'll randomly feel guilty or even embarassed about things that happened in the past. it ususally happens when i'm trying to sleep at night. You just got to clear your mind and think of the positive things happening right now!

jordi1234501 on 10/27/2009 4:51:51 PM

omg, i get the same thing! this will help me SO MUCH. thank you!!

purplexperfect on 10/27/2009 2:49:58 PM

***MOD***
almost 2 months ago, my bf and i broke up. we tried to talk after, but just ended getting in fights and not speaking/ignoring each other. after i'd cooled down, i texting him asking if we could talk calmly and try to be friends and he never replied. i was under the impression he hated me when last night, out of nowhere, he chatted me on Facebook about something silly he'd thought i'd like from a website. i'm happy he did, but i'm confused. i know he thinks i like one of my guy friends, but i don't. i'm not sure what to do now. any suggestions? i really miss him.

Hey babe,

He might have been feeling the same way and needed a break from you in order to try and be friends again. It's nice that he thought of something you might like and shared it with you. Take things in stride and don't push becoming close again too quickly. If you want to start talking to him again you should, but take things slowly.

xoxo Keltie

Keltie E.

P is for Pink on 10/26/2009 11:46:55 PM

This happens to me also! But it happens when I think, not when I am bored!

decemburr96 on 10/26/2009 10:18:34 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD
i kinda feel like i have an eating dissorder!!!but its not like i do it to myself... lately i havnt been eating anything at all.... like today i diddnt eat breakfast and all i had was my sandwich at lunch like nothing at all to drink (not even kidding they shut off our water fountians because of sickness issues) and today for dinner i wasnt hungry so i gave it to my dogs... also like my bowls of ceral used to be over flowing! now i can almost fit all of the ceral on my spoon! im not doing this to my self porpusly! its just im not hungry! any logical exp?

Hey girlie,

Hmmmmm...a loss of appetite could be caused by not getting enough sleep or by being stressed. Try to make a conscious effort to eat even if it's just small amounts (a piece of fruit for breakfast, a sandwich for lunch, a small dinner). Also, make sure that you are drinking enough water and keep hydrated.

xoxo Keltie

Keltie E.

Jasper_ROx12 on 10/26/2009 10:10:15 PM

i do that to i totally no what u mean.. ill just go to mi room and break out in tears because of something that happened like 2 or 3 weeks ago and even stuff from years ago... its terrible....

Jasper_ROx12 on 10/26/2009 10:04:25 PM

I have the same problem!
I always feel guilty about what happened when I was like in kindergarten and i accidently knocked a person down! I always feel guilty about little things like that!

emsha81 on 10/26/2009 9:50:32 PM

Just remember that you are probably the only one who does remeber these embarassing moments. Don't stress over these. Think of happy things and move on in life to better things.

Check out my profile; I give the best advice!

God Bless!

Abriella123 on 10/26/2009 9:36:47 PM

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Club Beauty on 10/26/2009 8:53:47 PM

MODMODMOD!!
k so im living every girls dream. my crush asked me to dance with him at the dance saturday, and we danced to three songs, including one slow dance. we talked for a while afterwards, and ive been texting him and flirting with him since then. i dont know him that well, weve only talked a few times before the dance, but i still like him and i think he might like me. the problem is that im getting really nervous. im starting to freak myself out cause i keep thinking well what if we get to know eachother more and he doesn't like me, or what if hes not the guy i thought he was. cause he hangs out with all the popular guys that have a new girlfriend every week and i can't stand them, but he seems different. i know every girl says that but it really seems true with him. also im the kind of girl that gets nervous about breaking the rules and doing stuff im not supposed to, even if its just talking in the movie theatre. im a freshman and he is too, but im so nervous about everything. i dont wanna get to the point where i dont even like him anymore cause im too nervous about what COULD happen in the future. please help me! i don't know what to do! i really like him!

Matagirl13 on 10/26/2009 7:57:06 PM

I am so sorry that happens to you. Sometimes I will get that way too, but it happens to you. Sorry.

hollyluv on 10/26/2009 7:54:00 PM

I get this, too, but not so much guilty as embarassed from something that happened so long ago that isn't even that bad.

ash_bash08 on 10/26/2009 7:39:56 PM

i get guilty sometimes...but everybody makes mistakes

hit.the.surfs. on 10/26/2009 7:30:29 PM

GO VEGETARIAN! For more info, request it at my profile Smile
Save the animals, be healthy, and stop global warming by going vegetarian. I have been a vegetarian for a year and 5 months.What is it? A vegetarian is when your diet contains no meat. How does it save animals? It obviously helps to stop the slautering of animals such as cows and chicken. How can you eat them when they are so cute (they are your friends).How does it improve your health? It cuts out lots of fat and chlosteral and you won't be overweight and you will have a healthy heart!Plus, reduces your chance of diseases and cancer. How does it stop global warming? Lots of energy is used in meat factories and butchering. The factory also creates pollution. It also kills trees so there is room for farms that kill animals for profit. Please help and go to petakids.com or my profile! Thanks for reading this!

tang454 on 10/26/2009 6:39:59 PM

i feel guilty all the time... what i do is focus on something else. i usually forget about it and if it comes back up into my head, i can never remember what i felt guilty about!

trackgirl000 on 10/26/2009 5:33:30 PM

Me too!I'm so hard on myself!

actress96 on 10/26/2009 5:29:23 PM

I have that same problem. I feel guilt a lot even when it was from like 3 years ago. I hate it.

Kaela :0) on 10/26/2009 5:08:56 PM

This happens to me all the time. and it sucks to have to deal with. Thanks for giving the advice hopefully it helps.

Maddyrox92 on 10/26/2009 4:40:47 PM

That's weird.. same thing happens to me all the time

biskii on 10/26/2009 4:39:07 PM

dittttttttto. i like that word.......

ditto.....

Ilovetwilight1479 on 10/26/2009 4:29:39 PM

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The Problem is Me!

I can't stop feeling guilty!

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