Kerra S.

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Girl Talk

My BFF is suicidal

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My best friend told me that she wants to kill herself! She even showed me a book about how she was going to do it! I told an adult right away! The said they were gonna get her help.

Before I told an adult I showed one of her friends...who ended up blabbing it to everyone. I feel really bad that everyone knows her business. She is mad at me because I told her I don’t really think she wants to kill herself.

I also told her that I think she is just trying to get a shoulder to cry on. I said I would always be there her I just don’t like the way she was asking me! Now what?

-Samantha

You did the right thing by telling an adult. Talk to your friend (the one who blabbed) about what she did and explain that you told her about your mutual friend’s problem in confidence (news flash: that means you thought she'd keep it a secret!). You might want to tell the blabber that you’ll have a hard time trusting her in the future, since she shared your friend’s very personal problem with so many people.

Next, explain to your best friend how sorry you are that it got out to so many people, but that you were just trying to get help. Try not to make her problems seem smaller or tell her that she doesn’t really want to kill herself. Even if you believe it’s true, such statements will hurt her and make her trust you less. Then, explain again that you’re always there for her, that you want to help her, and that you would be so incredibly sad if you ever lost her as a friend.

Suggest that whenever she gets depressed or feels suicidal again, that she call you, an adult she trusts, or a suicide hotline CLICK HERE for more information on help lines. That way, someone can help her talk through her problems and concerns and prevent anything dangerous from happening.

-Andie

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BY CAITLIN R. ON 11/4/2009 7:00:00 AM 23 COMMENTS

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*MOD*MOD*MOD*MOD*MOD*MOD*MOD*MOD*MOD*MOD*MOD*MOD I and this boy who is in a whole other team at my school are the only people from my elem. school who go to my school now.(im in 6th grade) now i hav a good friend who i talk 2 all the time but she wont talk about boys and u no how some times u hav 2 hav a girl 2 talk 2. Well, she is basically my closest friend even though the person ive nown the longest is that boy. BUT im not going 2 talk 2 a guy bout boys!!!Help please.

Hey girl! Try getting her to open up about a boy or dishing on your crush. She may get more comfy with talking about boys the more she hears about them!

-Taeler

Taeler L.

artsgurl983 on 11/10/2009 6:58:30 PM

Last year i had real depression, like medicine, doctors, thearapist, the whole bit. I would think about killing myself. One time in school we were talking about murder (i go to a christian school) and my classmate asked if suicide was murder. My teacher said it was, because it is not your life to take, because God has a plan for you. From then on, i never though about killing myself, though i did pray that God would take me away. What helps is to have something to look forward to, and get yourself really hyped up about it. Then you won't wanna kill yourself because you have something to look forward to. Yeah, so that's my advise to anyone who is going through suicidal thoughts.

dolliegirl on 11/9/2009 7:16:11 PM

Why would you EVER tell another friend about that? I mean, duh, you should tell an adult but that doesn't include telling the entire school. I hope you're good at apologizing and damage control.

chic chick on 11/8/2009 11:15:53 PM

*MOD* hi i hope you can maybe help me with this. I sometimes have thoughts about what would happen if I died, how would other people think about it, what to write in wills, and ways to die. I don't think I would ever go as far to hurt myself, but when I get so stressed and sad I feel like there's really no point in me living except maybe to make sure my friends and family don't get hurt or anything. I'm just really confused a lot. But I've never physically hurt myself. How can I stop thinking like this?

Hey girl! You need to start focusing on the positive. Make a list of all the great things in your life: your amazing friends and fam, that class you love so much, your healthy eating habits, etc. Write down anything great about your life or yourself and post it in a place you'll see every morning, like your mirror or bedroom door. Also, involve yourself in things that you enjoy. Loving that art class? Sign up to take some classes outside of school too! By surrounding yourself with positive energy and just keeping yourself busy with things you love, you'll find you spend a lot less time being down. best of luck, Kristen

Kristen Y.

*wink*wink* on 11/8/2009 4:47:56 PM

**************mod***************
sometimes i get really depressed and i think "whats the point in living?!" and i think about it... then later soemthing really good happens, and i don't think about it anymore. but this happens regularly - like when i get in a fight with my sister or friend. or when my mom or dad yells at me.
what should i do???

Those arn't good things to think about. I suggest you make an effort to look at the positive things in life more. Stop to smell in the roses. Appreciate the blessings you have. Although you might fight with your parents or sister you should think about all the good memories you have with them. Also think about how sad and devastated they will be if you kill yourself. It's not worth it. However if you continue to have these thoughts i suggest you go to a counselor or your parents. Good luck girly! remember it will all be ok. xoxo kerra

Kerra S.

cheyz09 on 11/7/2009 9:31:25 PM

Sometimes when i get really sad or really mad at myself I feel like that sometimes but I actually don't want to kill myself
Kayla xoxo

redsoxlover on 11/7/2009 1:45:42 PM

mod...mod..mod
thanks allie i'll tell her.
peace out,
chesapeake

dancing4ever1997 on 11/6/2009 8:34:01 PM

MOD***MOD***MOD
Okay so i told one of my really close friends (let's call her jamey) who i liked. Then the next day she goes and tells him 'i know someone who likes you' then when he said 'who' she just stared at me. I did tell her how i felt and she said she was sorry and wouldn't do it again. Also when me and another of our close friends (let's call her Hanna) started to trust her again Hanna told her who she liked and she bluntly told him that Hanna liked him. I am going out with the guy i told jamey about now, but how should hanna and i start to trust jamey again because we don't want to grow apart from her by not telling her things. PLEASE HELP ME!!!
lots of love,
Chesapeake

Hey babe,

Tell Jamey that you're having problems trusting her and why. If she knows ands to change, that might help. really want

xoxo Allie

Allie S.

dancing4ever1997 on 11/6/2009 8:14:33 PM

You did do the right thing, Are you sure she would go through with it? I have a friend whom does have depression, and she's said shed kill herself so many times, I cant even count....

organiccheese on 11/6/2009 2:28:17 PM

hey i feel bad for you(because you have to go though that)and for your friend im only ten years old soo i dont know how its feels but just tell her youll always be there for her and do not worry

AngelWings785 on 11/6/2009 7:39:06 AM

hey girls!! i'm having my birthday party next weekend!!! i already thought of some ideas, like were going to hang out in my hot tub watch movies and hang donuts from the ceiling and see who can eat theirs fastest without using their hands!!! any other suggestions would be appreciated!
ps its a sleepover and i'm turning 14 thanks!

lovemusic!23 on 11/5/2009 8:20:41 PM

hey im having a little bit of friend troule... this girl and I had a huge fight for about 3 months then we became friends.. About a week ago we got in to another fight and i was the one tht said sorry and she said she wouldnt blame things on me bcuz she always does.... then a few days ago she thought tht i open and closed her door in the moring before school to scare her... And i told her i didnt and she still didnt believe me.. so i didnt talk 2 her for a day and then i said i was sorry for getting mad at her... but shouldnt she say sorry 2 me, for blaming something on me when i didnt do it... should i talk to her???

peacelover55 on 11/5/2009 7:31:36 PM

It was good that you tolf an adult, but you shouldn't have told classmates. You should appologize and regain your friends trust.

Check out my profile; I give the best advice!

God Bless!

Abriella123 on 11/5/2009 6:04:24 PM

***MOD MOD MOD***
shud I fix or ditch this friend?!one of my "friends", let's call her C, is friends with these 2 other girls: A and S. Well, I used 2 be friends with S in 6th grade, and the beginning of 7th grade, but now she is a total stuck up snobby attitude filled 13 yr old. Now, she is telling ALL my friends that I'm a liar and a spoiled brat!!!!now all my friends except 1 true friend, hates my guts just as much as S dus!!!!and btw, these r friends from skool, I have a lot of other friends from sports tho...and so, C completely ignores me!!!!we used 2 b so close in 7th grade, I actually became her first friend when she came 2 the school from Canada last year, and now she hates my guts!!!!I never did ANYTHING to friend C, and now I feel like a total outcast!!!!!I have a minor problem with friend A, and she only talks 2 me and is nice 2 me when S isn't around..but when she is around, she acts just like S!!!!!S luvs 2 sabotage me and 2 get all my friend against me and on her side and I just want to burst into tears because I'm gna hav 2 deal with her in HS cuz she's goin 2 the same skool as me!!!!!I don know what 2 do anymore!!!I'm wwwwaaaaayyyyy far from suicidal and I wud NEVER commit it even if I had no friends at all, so I'm def not at that point...I feel like I can't trust anybody anymore because they r just gna stab me in the back...so, shud I fix my sitch with friends A and C, or shud I ditch them cuz they r only nice when S isn't around!? THANKS!!!!!
***MOD MOD MOD***

Hey girl, I know it's hard but you're right. You should ditch them because true friends aren't conditional. True friends are nice to you all the time. You're going to meet a ton of people in HS and you have other friends. Stick to them and ditch the drama. You deserve the best, and they're certainly not.

xoxo

Alyssa B.

FutureWarriorCheerleader on 11/4/2009 11:08:31 PM

my BFF who looks like she might do that to but she doesn't say anything about it in fact she says nothing anymore!

fafa109 on 11/4/2009 8:09:53 PM

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~lasagna~

Club Creativity on 11/4/2009 7:02:28 PM

CLUB CREATIVITY WANTS YOU TO JOIN!

Just CLICK on my name or SEARCH Club Creativity! We love getting new members and sharing our creative work!

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and sweetreddancer's CHAPTER BOOK!

Come join today!

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Club Creativity

Club Creativity on 11/4/2009 5:32:18 PM

GO VEGETARIAN! For more info, request it at my profile Smile
Save the animals, be healthy, and stop global warming by going vegetarian. I have been a vegetarian for a year and 5 months.What is it? A vegetarian is when your diet contains no meat. How does it save animals? It obviously helps to stop the slautering of animals such as cows and chicken. How can you eat them when they are so cute (they are your friends).How does it improve your health? It cuts out lots of fat and chlosteral and records show that vegetarian have a lower risk of obesity and diseases.Plus, reduces your chance of diseases and cancer. How does it stop global warming? Lots of energy is used in meat factories and butchering. The factory also creates pollution. It also kills trees so there is room for farms that kill animals for profit. Please help and go to my profile! Thanks for reading this! -Aubrey Allie S.

glamgirlteen on 11/4/2009 5:31:07 PM

O my goodness! That is so horrible! Andie gave way awesome advice.

lasagna on 11/4/2009 4:50:37 PM

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lasagna on 11/4/2009 4:49:42 PM

MOD MOD MOD!!!!
how do i get over a guy that will never like me?? hes totally cute and nice and funny and a good artist, but he has a GF and my ex-bf is his best freind. HOW DO I GET OVER HIM??? ive liked him for months!!

Hey girl! Just keep yourself busy- join a club or hang out with friends. Anything to get your mind off of him. Then, start scoping out other guys. Really look for cute guys because then you will realize there are soo many cuter guys out there than your current crush and you will wonder why you aren't talking to them. Good luck!

xoxo

Liz

Liz L.

FOBrox on 11/4/2009 3:22:38 PM

WOW... i kninda know how u feel. one of my freinds was depressed last year and told my BFF that she wanted 2 kill herself but she wasnt totally serious. just really sad. a teacher found out and then she went 2 consuling. shes better now tho. =)

FOBrox on 11/4/2009 3:20:26 PM