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My Friends Leave Me Out

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My friends do things without me.

I get so upset when I’m left out, but I don’t want to seem needy.

It hurts to be home and hoping for the phone to ring. Instead of fighting the urge to call them, you can solve your problem with a simple solution: Don’t depend on them.

Join a club, and make other friends. Once you have other fun things to do, you won’t even care if you’re not included in every outing.

TELL US NOW! Need advice ASAP? Click the purple SEND A QUESTION button to ask our very own Lucky for help!

BY CAITLIN R. ON 11/19/2009 7:00:00 AM 86 COMMENTS

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I had old friends who leave me behind and never invited me to things. I just started to make new friends and sit with them at lunch soooooo much better than barely talking and have no clue what my exfriends were talking about.

4yah101 on 3/2/2010 12:31:59 AM

MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP! Just to answer a question that might come in later in the problem. -YES. I'm in grade school.- My BFF and I used to play together ALL the time. Then this chick started to play with her one day a week. Then two. Then three. Then four. Then five days a week! (That's the whole school week!) She started to include me, and then the chick and my BFF ignore me. Is this a BIG problem?! I can't join any clubs because my school doesn't have any. I even started crying in school the other day!!!!!!!! MOD- HELP!!!!!!!

Hey chicky, I'm super busy right now. I would love to chat with ya, but it's just not possible at the moment. Ask some of our lovely bloggers for help, they give great advice trust me. Thanx for understanding. x0x0 Lynae

Lynae P.

HorseRider101 on 2/15/2010 7:46:09 PM

MOD MOD MOD!
ok so my "best" friend always leaves other people out and then the ONE time me and my other friends leave her out she freeks out and crys and calls us bad words and she tells all her other friendswe are bad people... what do i do?

Tell her how you feel. Tell her how she always leaves people out and that everyone she leaves out feels like she did when you left her out and they didnt freak out on her. So yeah just talk to her about everything. Good luck! xoxo kerra

Kerra S.

koolios on 1/30/2010 5:42:51 PM

at least your "friends" weren't people that live in the same house as you like my situation was... my step sis started it all by talking bad about us and our parents then it went to her spreading rumors through our house and then finally after 3 years of being left out she moved to her moms and she hasn't came back since december 14 or 18

gwentrent on 1/23/2010 12:15:05 AM

So I NEED HELP!!! I have this one friend who has been my BFF for 4 years. She's starting to ditch me for my(and her) other BFF. The other BFF wants to stay friends w/ both of us and she doesn't even realize how much BFF#1 is leaving me out. I know that BFF#1 is a real friend, so I don't wanna leave her, but I do wanna aviod confrontation because were going on vacation together in a month and how awkwars would that be. Please help me!!! comment on my page with your reply! PLZ I NEED HELP!!

viasia21 on 1/13/2010 2:12:27 PM

I know what you mean try and hold on to the time you do spend together. And if you are stilll missing out I mentioned it to my closest friends and now we hang out alot more most of the time people just don't realize taht they're even doing.

b-ball babe 11 on 1/8/2010 8:55:08 PM

Ya, My 2 best friends just recently started leaving me out of things and I took lucky's advice and I moved on to "bigger and better" things! lol Thanks luckky! you really helped me! ♥

xoxo527 on 12/28/2009 4:59:27 PM

I hate friends, that are like that!

sixteengirl93 on 12/27/2009 5:25:18 PM

MOD!MOD!MOD!my friends leave me out of everything and make fun of me but her brother is about to have my friend's baby. should i breakup our friendship.

Hey girl! You might want to explain to her how you feel and try to make your relationship better.

Eryn G.

crookedperfect on 12/25/2009 9:53:47 PM

MOD MOD MOD
okay so my best friend is hanging out with the cooler girls its like a fight to keep hr my best friend shes knows EVERYTHING about me plus i hear some of the girls talk about her behind her back everytime i try to talk to her about it she doesnt wanna hear it and we get into a big fight and i just dont know wat to do...

Hey girl! You might want to talk to your school counselor about this because she might be able to help this problem. It might be hard for you to work out on your own.

Eryn G.

twilightsagaluver on 12/9/2009 3:17:49 PM

MOD,
Lately my friend has been ignoring me. She gets together with her other friends, and lies about it later. It went from a really close friendship to almost silence. I really miss my friend. I'm afraid to tell her how I feel. I don't want her to get mad, but I want her to know.
Please rply soon, Ellie M.

Hey girl! if she is your bf you should nicely tell her how you feel. You could say that you miss her and want to hang out or something. Its important that you say something so that the situation doesn't get worse.

Eryn G.

purplewriter5 on 12/9/2009 1:03:48 PM

*****MOD*****
so two of my friends, (we'll call them h and p) have been leaving out lately, and not just for plans, but in school too. likee they ignore me and leave me out of conversations a LOT. so i tried making up with h and i think things are good again, but with p she was nice for a little bit but then made fun of me which really pissed me off, cause h went along with it, cause they've been best friends since elementary and ive only know these guys for a year and a half. but the thing is if it werent for p, things with me and h would be fine. its like p is causing this. but like a month ago we were all really good friends, idk what happened. and i dont want to lose h, b/c shes one of my best friends. i like p too, but if she keeps acting like this then i dont know. what should i dooo?

Hey girl, friends don't treat other friends the way they're treating you. Let them know how you feel about what they do politely and see what happens. If they clean up their act, great. If they don't? Distance yourself. Sometimes people don't realize what they have until it's gone for a bit.

xoxo

Alyssa B.

moondance17 on 11/25/2009 11:55:55 PM

haha i know its kinda late..... BUT MY BIRTHDAY WAS ON THE 23RD!!!!!!

happy birthday to me ;9

cnell411 on 11/25/2009 11:23:28 PM

Please tell me what MOD means... I'm new to this website!

Hey girl, mod means moderator. We basically answer all your Q's on GL.

xoxo

Alyssa B.

LittleCherryCupcakes on 11/25/2009 10:45:56 PM

MOD
Theres a girl in my school who never really talks to me in school, but when we are on AIM and stuff she always asks me for my opinon and that stuff. If her friends aren't watching, she'll talk to me. She's a nice girl, but shes kinda popular, and as much as I want to be her friend, I dont want to get hurt by thinking we are and then getting dumped. What do you think I should do??!!

Hey girl! Just stay civil but don't expect anything out of it. If she only talks to you on AIM though, she's prob not worth your time. Find some friends who don't mind publicly declaring you are their friend.

xoxo

Liz L.

superstar911 on 11/25/2009 4:43:16 PM

I think you should invite them. It won't make you sound needy at all!

superstar911 on 11/25/2009 4:38:44 PM

hey girls!
come check out christiangirlsclub for all things christian and great advice!
hope to see you there!

christiangirlsclub on 11/25/2009 3:52:10 PM

Same here.

chatterbox19067 on 11/25/2009 2:09:29 PM

I think you should invite them to do something with you. It will probably mean an instant invite to their next get together.
For advice on anything and everything, got o my profile!
Ellie

DayDreamer66 on 11/25/2009 12:47:08 PM

mod mod mod
ok so me and my bff have been friends FOREVER!! but now, shes hanging out a lot with my other super close friend. They do everything together and they never invite me. They go shopping a lot and then talk about it at school right in front of me when its just the three of us. i hate it!

Hey girl! Try telling them how you feel and how that hurts your feelings. If they keep doing it, then they aren't real friends and you should forget about them and find some better ones.

xoxo

Liz

Liz L.

dancingirl12 on 11/25/2009 11:29:51 AM

~modmodmod~
I have had a few friends sincethird grade and we have been super-close we also were friends with a different girl but something happened with her and that girl stopped hanging out with us. So that other girl kind of hated us until this year, 8th grade. Well my super close friends stopped talking to me in the middle of summer and one of them is in my classes and she just doesn't really talk to me. I want to be friends ( not necessarily bff) but I don't know how to talk to them! Please help!

Hey girl! Just try to casually say hi one day and see if she responds. If she does, then that's good news. If she doesn't, try to forget about starting the friendship over. It's probably not worth it anyway.

xoxo

Liz

Liz L.

Wrockstarz22 on 11/25/2009 1:09:04 AM

**MOD** Please help asap! I'm soryr i know this is long but pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease. Okay so over the past few weeks I have been getting into fights with my friends Lisa and Reece because they think i'm spending too much time with my boyfriend and this girl Ana started getting invloved because they were telling ana all about me and what i was doing wrong so ana was coming to me and saying well you should stop doing this blablabla and i dont really trust her from previous experiences and i told reece and im pretty sure reece told her because yesterday ana spazzed out at me because she said she heard i was saying she was starting fights and stuff and reece was laughing the whole time and im not really mad at Lisa but i didnt go to school today cause im sick and she didnt even call me to see what was wrong or anything and i dont feel like i can depend on them and i dont really want to be friends with them but i really dont have anyone else because my grade is small and everyone else hangs out in the bad croud! Should I just call ana and apologize and see if i can get this over with or should i just ignore them because i have been triyng very hard lately to be friends with them again but they just keep being mean and leaving me out and stuff and i checked today and i'm not on reeces top friends and i tried to talk to her because she said we needed to talk at school and she said she didnt care. I've lost my trust in all of them. What should i do? PLEASE HELP.

Hey girl! You should def talk to them. Sit them all down and discuss what's going on face-to-face. Talking it out will feel better and all of you can move past it! Try not to dwell on it too much and try to understand everyone's point of view !

-Taeler

Taeler L.

madeleine1232 on 11/24/2009 6:19:30 PM

**MOD**!
I really need help!!! Over the past few weeks my friends and I have been getting into fights because they say im spending too much time with my boyfriend, and this girl I don't trust Ana was getting involved and trying to 'help' but from previous experiences ive learned not to trust her and i felt that her getting involved was making things worse. I texted one of my friends reece the other night and said i was sorry and that i wanted to be friends and that ana was just starting fights and i think reece showed ana the text because at recess ana spazzed out at me and started shouting at me about how I was talking about her and reece was laughing while we were fighitng and reece is supposed to be one of my best friends since forever and i feel so betrayed. I feel like i have no girlfriends anymore! What should I do? Should I call Ana tonight to apologize or should i just avoid all of them?

Hey girl!You should plan a girls night and invite all of your friends, and no boys. You guys can have fun and this will show that you are making a effort to spend more time with them.

Eryn G.

madeleine1232 on 11/24/2009 1:45:37 PM

Hey girlies everywhere! come check out my profile! my quotes with make you LOL!

rightfield1 on 11/24/2009 7:01:29 AM

MOD MOD MOD MOD
Sorry I ask mod a lot of questions and it's all about the same thing... I just like to get different points of views on this.
Ok so there is this guy I like and he is in 8th grade and I am in 7th. He is a little shy and knows who I am but has only talked to me once (he was getting a ball back that someone took from my friends and I) He stares at me alot and my BFFL knows him and was going to introduce me to him but she hasn't gotten the chance yet... I am also a little shy but I don't get shy when I talk to guys I like, I also don't like when people know who I like (unless it's my friends) so I don't really want to be flirty but do I have a choice? Last year he also signed my yearbook and I signed his but that's pretty much the ony contact we have had... Idk what to do.Sorry this is so long. Thank you. Btw I've read almost everthing on guyville.

Hey girl,

If you aren't nervous around guys you like then go talk to him. You don't really need to be flirty or cutesy. Just say hello. If he signed your yearbook then he knows who you are. Just waltz up to him and ask him what's up.

xoxo Keltie

Keltie E.

vbgirl4life97 on 11/23/2009 11:19:15 PM

It is okay...
I know how you feel!
My friends do the same thing to me1
they always leave me out.
but here is some
advice.try talking to them.
or you can just try to do
something that is funner!
like, playing sprots....
but you have tons of
advice from others peoples
on this website.!

PurplePanda87 on 11/23/2009 10:30:11 PM

MOD! my sister is just like my best friend. We are always having fun, and i can talk to her about everything. The only problem is, she's in college kinda far away. I visit her sometimes and she comes home but im always sad because i miss her so much! What should i do to not be sad? We already talk on the phone all the time.

Hey girl! That can be so hard! I know how you feel; I'm away from my sisters, too! Try sending her a card or some care package to let her know you're thinking of her. It's so great you keep in touch but it will get easier and make the time you do spend together so much sweeter!

-Taeler

Taeler L.

animaluver438 on 11/22/2009 10:44:11 PM

I feel this way too.
I'm just to chicken to make other friends;(
And whenever I point it out they get mad at me, yell at me (throught TEXTS!) and don't talk to me for like a week!

elena_bliss137 on 11/22/2009 10:27:47 PM

MOD MOD i dont know if this same question was already asked by me.. i think i didnt go through. if it did sorry 4 repeating! anyways, where do u go to delete the profile? actually, all i really wannna do is change my username. can i do this? if not, i will just delete it. thanks so much! sorry 4 all the questions!

Hey girl! Just let us know. You have to create a new profile to switch your username so if you want it deleted, let a mod or report your profile and it will get taken care of for ya!

-Taeler

Taeler L.

alixpoth on 11/22/2009 10:25:00 PM

MOD MOD sorry, im full of questions 2day.

can u delete a profile on GL??? thanks!

Hey girl! Yep, just let GL know and we can get the profile taken care of!

-Taeler

Taeler L.

alixpoth on 11/22/2009 9:10:40 PM

This is so not cool my friend used to be controlled by my ex-friend ( NO HOMO) I think she was making a good decision and let her go but she is trying to be my friend again

jessacsunshine5 on 11/22/2009 8:12:18 PM

MOD MOD MOD!have u ever tried clearasil ultra?i just got some and want to know if it works!thanks

Hey girl, I've never tried it myself, but feel free to ask some of the other bloggers on the site. Keep in mind, everyone's skin is different, so what works or doesn't work for someone else might end up being different for you. ~Kristen <3

Kristen Y.

kayc1111 on 11/22/2009 7:20:16 PM

Tell them what you think if they dont let you in on stuff find some outher things to do with outher friends they will come back askin but tell them that they cant levea you out and any ways a good friend would not leave you out or a bff bf bffl

Oncey on 11/22/2009 5:10:51 PM

MOD MOD MOD My older sis is always mean and making fun of me and calling me names. Her friends always join in too. Is there anything i can do to show her how much i like her and want her to stop. ???? thanks.

Hey girl! You can always try to talk to her directly. Let her know exactly how you feel. For all you know, she might think she's being funny without realizing that she's really hurting your feelings. If that doesn't work, just ignore her. I know it's way easier said than done, but if you act like you don't care, she'll eventually stop. Good luck! ~Kristen <3

Kristen Y.

save_the_sharks on 11/22/2009 4:58:19 PM

hey chickies! check out my profile!
i give great advice, just leave me a comment.
peace out!

britster13 on 11/22/2009 3:01:01 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD i met my best friend in 2nd grade, and we are the Best of friends, but then after 4th grade we both moved away, and now i live in a different country over 2,000 miles away. I'm now in 8th grade, and we miss each other sooo much. i really want to see her, and we were talking about buying a plane ticket for me to see her, but i don't have any money. I don't get allowance, because my parents don't think it is right. My mom says that she doesn't want me flying by myself because I'm only 13, and i have no way to get any money. do you have any recomendations on how to raise money? please help me!!!!!!!! thnx!

Hey chica, you could always start babysitting to make some cash. Ask your family, friends and neighbors if they have any small children they need to be watched. Then ask them if they have any family, friends or neighbors who need babysitters. Set up days, hours and charges for your babysitting. Hope this helps ya!

Lynae P.

colorCute4 on 11/22/2009 1:31:25 PM

*********MOD***************MOD**********MOD*******

HHey, my crush really only talks to me online. How can I flirt with him through the computer? Thanks!

stlouis16 on 11/22/2009 10:40:41 AM

hey girls come join club peace girls!!! you can even sign up for being a mod for fashion, beauty tips, and well anything!!! come join club peace girls!!!

abby777 on 11/22/2009 10:36:31 AM

MOD MOD MOD
I have 2 best friends recently they have been leaving me out i don't know what to do because i don't want to make them hate me more.Please help me!

Hey girl! You should invite them both over to your house so that you guys can all hang out together..it will e fun!

Eryn G.

taytaylorswift on 11/21/2009 2:00:31 PM

***MOD***
Are guys as nervous as girls to ask someone out?

Hey girl! Everyone does get nervous around guys.

Eryn G.

sodapoprocker on 11/21/2009 1:57:52 PM

MOD MOD MOD!!!!
Okay, when I was in Kindergarden, I made this friend. Me and her were inserable! We were besties till third grade, when I moved to a different school. I came back and fourth grade, and I looked at her and she looked the same. We made a tomboy pact in kinder, and she stuck to it. Then fifth grade came. She was wearinf short shorts, tighting her shirts to make her look thin, and saying cruel jokes.
When she came over for a girl scout party,(which was like a couple weeks ago. we are in sixth grade now) I had this little make up thing I never used. well she used it, and thought she was all glam, and she thinks she better then me. she talks with tude to her parents, and its stupid. It seems only i have stuck to the tomboy pact.
HELP!

Hey babe! People go through different phases, it's a part of growing up. Her phase will pass, but it may take time. You'll probably go through different phases too. If she's mean to you, try hanging with your other friends, and eventually she'll probably come around. It's hard to understand where your friend is coming from, because she's acting so strange and different, but she's just trying to find and understand herself. You can be there for her, but if she's mean to you the best thing to do is go on your way and hang out with the friends who respect you and make you feel comfortable.

Megan R.

fizzydrinkmixer1 on 11/21/2009 11:27:34 AM

omg! the same things haapens to me all the time!
just last night i called my BFF to come ova and she said she already is hanging out with her other friend, even thought Friday is always out nitgh! wether we do our Web show, eat food, see a movie or juts hang out, its our night!

xmonkeybrain10 on 11/21/2009 11:26:43 AM

Personally I don't think those are your friends. I think that you should tell them how you feel about them leaving you out and if they don't listen, then make some new friends! There more people out there willing to be your friend than you think !

Thepartydontstarttilliwalkin on 11/21/2009 11:07:17 AM

Just want to know... is anyone on
TEAM HARRY

Smileygirl86 on 11/21/2009 8:17:41 AM

(( defintaly find some new friends, it may seem scary at first, but you can do it!!!

sleepalotspot on 11/21/2009 6:12:13 AM

MOD!
hey, im homeschooled and considering going to high school next year. It's not the first time ive been in public school. but how should i go about making the decision? its a HUGE decision for me cause it would be diff in so many ways. One of the things that make me want to go is that my older bro is a senior next year and it would be so cool to be able to go the same school as his for the 1st time. I dont want to make the wrong decision, please help.

Make a list of the pros and cons to see which will be better for you. That will be the best way to make the right decision. xoxo kerra

Kerra S.

grace2985 on 11/20/2009 10:58:51 PM

MOD MOD MOD!!!! MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have a Bff, and she HATED this one girl, becuz of some friendship drama 2 years ago. she nicknamed her as "bitch" and suddenly last month they made up and apologized. their "hate war" has been going on for the past 2 1/2 yrs...I'm glad they made up..but my bff is leaving me out. and like barely talking to me....this girl is moving in a month or so...and she was like crying..like crazy..and i feel bad. but she is totally forgetting about me w/ the friend she made again last month.and wenever i try to talk to her about this she goes like " DUDE BUT SHE'S MOVING" w/ a whiney voice. who's right here? am i being too harsh? what should i say?! Help plz and thanx!

She is being a little unfair. However this girl is moving soon, so let her have her time with her. Once the other girl moves away, your friend will probably go back to normal and give you more attention. Good luck! xoxo kerra

Kerra S.

orangecrazy21 on 11/20/2009 10:35:04 PM

My friends are doin' that a lot now too. Maybe it's time for both of us to move on and get a little more outside the friend box Good Luck!It's all gonna end out great!

Totallydogs101 on 11/20/2009 9:06:20 PM

Mod mod mod Allie S.
Thanks. I'll talk to her about it. But what should I do about her always wanting rides from me and what my other friend said about that being the reason she will sometimes invite me? I hope you know which post I'm talking about...

Hey babe,

I remember your post. That's another thing you should talk to her about. Tell her that you feel like she might be using you and that it hurts your feelings. If she's really not doing it on purpose she'll be okay with you taking a break from giving her rides for awhile and just hanging out without getting anything out of it until you can trust her.

xoxo Allie

Allie S.

Nikki01195 on 11/20/2009 5:49:05 PM

Mod mod mod
I have the same problem as here.
My one group of "friends" always leave me out. I am, or I thought I was, really close with my friends, especially one girl, K. K is my longest friendship and we always have fun together. But recently she's become tight with simeonther people who I have also become friends with because of her. I know she like-likes one of our friends M. Whenever she's around him she ignores me. Always. K always invites me when Ms not there. Is that weird? It seems mean to me. AND. Whenever she invites me somewhere she expects me to drive her there and home. My mom gets annoyed. I feel like she only hangs out with me so I can drive her. What do I do? This makes me feel awful when they leave me out. One friend V told me that she only invited me to a movie last time so she could get a ride.

Hey babe,

Talk to her about it and let her know how you feel. she may not realize that she's hurting you and she might want to change to stay friends. It's possible that she's so wrapped up in her crush that she hasn't noticed.

xoxo Allie

Allie S.

Nikki01195 on 11/20/2009 5:39:16 PM

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