So you finally got his number, and your heart’s racing. You send that text message and wait for your phone to blink, the words “New message from...” and his name appearing on your screen. You’ve talked to this guy before, but texting seems to be a whole different language.
You’re sure you can find out whether this guy likes you telephonically, but you’ve just gotta ace the lingo first. Well, chica, don’t be lost in texts-lation this time around. GL’s got the low-down on how to read between the lines!
The One Word Reply Guy
Sure, you can hold a convo, but in this case you’re literally holding it up. You're interviewing this sweetie Katie Couric-style—always asking all questions. “What’s up?” “NM.” “How’re you?” “Good.” His weak, monosyllable replies have you puzzled for sure.
Crack his code. Every good journalist knows the importance of open questions. Stay away from closed ones where this dude can fall into his usual habit and just say "yeah" or "nah." Ask him what he’s doing then strike some good follow-ups. Get playful and witty—it’s all about finding a way to get the convo to naturally flow from this dude.
What his texts say about you. If your new technique is still only greeted by weak replies, this guy just isn’t interested in texting. Try talking to him in class instead. This way he’ll have to give you more than one word or abbreviated answers and you can feel out if he likes ya or not.
The Leaves Ya Hangin' Hottie
You send him a text and get a reply...an hour later. No biggie, you text him again, and it’s yet another hour or longer before you see a message in your inbox. This dude’s fleeting attention makes your convo anything but easy.
Crack his code. Chances are this fella is either one of two things: busy or just doesn’t feel like texting. Ask him if he’s got something going on next time or if it’s a bad time to text—it’s totes fine if he’s busy...you can talk later. But if he keeps this up 24/7? Your time’s best spent typing to someone else.
What his texts say about you. It all depends. His sporadic replies could be his way of saying he’s just got a jam-packed sched. Or it could be that he just isn’t interested in. Get to the bottom of what he’s doing by casually asking him what’s going on—in person if you have to.
The Cry For Help Cutie
You’ve always been good friends, but lately this guy has been paying you a lot more attention. Your inbox is filled with messages from him, but they all seem to have one theme: him complaining about a breakup or friend drama.
Crack his code. Make sure your conversation is more than just other people. Help him through his issues but don’t be afraid change the topic—preferably to something lighter or your friendship with this guy. While it’s never cool to be the rebound, it’s not cool to be his permanent Dear Carol either.
What his texts say about you. Obviously this guy trusts you—or he just wants attention. Get to the bottom of why he’s spilling this to you and make sure he’s not just using you. Chances are there might just be something special between you two. Either you're his go-to gal for advice, or maybe he feels like he can open up around you the way BF/GFs do.
The Schizophrenic Suitor
You’ve had some great convos with this guy—the kind that make you just smile and tug at your heart-strings. He’s a cutie, and you just mesh so well…until he starts ignoring you. This guy seems to have a texting cycle: cute convo, ignore, cute convo, ignore and it’s driving you in circles!
Crack his code. Pick up the pattern. Try asking him in person what he’s been up to during the ‘ignore’ portion of the cycle. Do this without sounding super-stalker by keeping the convo cas.“I texted you the other day and didn’t hear back. Hope everything’s going well!” Then, let this dude explain for himself.
What his texts say about you. You two get on when you’re talking, but he might just be a li’l nervous to take that next step. It seems like you may have a shy (or confused) cutie. Try talking to him in person or hanging out one-on-one. Actions speak way louder than words!
The Shy in Person Guy
You guys are always a-texting, but communication beside that? Not so much. In school, he seems to dodge you like a bullet. Face-to-face interaction during to the school day? Non-existent, but the moment you step on that bus, your phone vibrates. New message from him. What’s the deal?
Crack his code. This guy may just be a bit nervous about talking to you in person. It’s way easier to talk to people over a text message than to their face. Try suggesting you meet in person before class sometime and see how he reacts.
What his texts say about you. This guy may just like you but isn’t sure how to act around you. Help the fellow out by dropping hints on how much you’d like to chill with him. He should pick ‘em up and realize it’s no biggie.
The First Time Texting Fella
You just got his digits, and you’re on good terms at school. You know him casually, but texting just seems to take your relationship to another level. You’ve talked once or twice, but you’re not sure whether that third time will be the charm or a big no-text alarm.
Crack his code. Think about the text messages he’s sent you and the interactions you’ve had in school. Did he seem interested? Texting is a great way to get to know this guy more. If you’re picking up feel-good vibes, don’t be afraid to make the first move. Try asking about a homework assignment—something casual and coming up—and let the convo grow from there.
What his texts say about you. You guys are just developing your relationship, so keep things light for now. When you’re ready, don’t be afraid to flirt a bit and watch out for the sparks. Remember, girlie, slow and steady wins the race, and the best way to snag that guy is not only through texts but talking face-to-face.
And psst! The best way to debunk and text debacle is to hang out with a dude face-to-face. Yeah, you can ask him out via text, but make sure you have plans to hang in person, too! Good luck !
BY ALYSSA BAILEY ON 1/17/2010 7:00:00 AM
POSTED IN how to flirt, crush crash course