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ADVICE | FRIENDS | GIRL TALK

154 Comments | Add Yours

My "BFF" is starting rumors about me

 

Check these out, too...

  • Help! I made out with my bestie's crush
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  • I called my bud's school "skanky" and now she's fuming
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  • 3 times it's OK to tell your bestie's secret

I found out, just recently, that my best friend ever, has been talking behind my back! She is starting rumors that I have a crush on this really gross kid named John. I don't like him at all.


She's telling everyone that I want to kiss him on the lips and go out with him! I don't. She keeps denying it, but I know that it's true. What should I do?


Hey girl! It’s never fun to have gossip started about you and it can be way humiliating to deal. It's even worse when you find out that a so-called friend is firing up the rumor mill. Uh oh.


Put it into perspective

Well, at least she's not telling the world that you actually kissed John or exposing some of your juicier (and true!) secrets. Having people think you like someone you don’t might seem awful and give the wrong impression, but there are worse things she could be saying, like you have bad B.O. or funny hair.


Tell your pal to stop the talk

Let your lady know that you don’t like John and would really appreciate it if she stopped telling people that you did. Ask her to put herself in your shoes and how she would like it if you were saying these mean things about her. Confront this chickadee one-on-one or write her a little note. Tell her how you feel—you thought you two were the best of the bests, but since she's spreading rumors about you, you feel like there's a problemo. Ask her what's up and give her a chance to explain herself before you act any further. There's gotta be something that caused her to do this, so start investigating.


Brush it off
 

People often make up rumors to make a person mad, so ignore everyone, play it off and just act major chill. If someone says, "OMG! I heard that you wanna marry John!" play if off with a cas, "Nope. Negative!" or catch 'em back with a sarcastic comment, "Yeah, I'm already planning the honeymoon." But whatever you do, don't bad mouth John, either (a.k.a. don't shoot back with a "John!?" GROSS!" every time somebody asks). Yeah, he  might be a "really gross kid" but he's also a person with feelings. So, just give off a killer-chill vibe and lay low.


And while it might seem tempting to make up a rumor about your friend to get her back, that will only lead to bigger problems. Do your best to diffuse the situation by pretending like it doesn’t bother you. That’s one of the best ways to make her stop.


Xoxo,
Liz

FRIENDS GOT YOU FRANTIC? CLICK HERE to submit your own problem to be answered on Girl Talk.

POSTED ON 1/20/2010 7:00:00 AM

POSTED IN 411 on fighting with friends, by bestie is spilling my secrets

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154 Comments | Add Yours
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I had almost an exact problem! Did anyone you trust tell you? Use her as an example and evidence! If she starts to get angry and denies then you should talk to another friend about it. Ask for support. At sometime this girl will realize that what she said wasn't so nice and that if she wants to stay friends it's time for a HUGE apology

report

by popsweet838 on 2/25/2010 4:47:25 PM

 
 

Hey Everyone--
If you don't want to wait for a mod to answer your questions, I'm happy to give advice. Just post a comment on my profile and i'll answer you within a day. Love to the girlies
<3

report

by SuNsHiNe_LuVeR on 2/15/2010 10:05:47 PM

 
 

Hey Anyone Their? I've Got Serious Friend Troubles. Ok, We Used To Be BFF's In 4th Grade, but then in 5th grade, I found a new BFF. We Never Fight and she's the best BFF I've ever had. You can probably tell her name by reading my user name. Let's call my old BFF... Sara. "Sara" and I in 5th grade were still good friends but now we are in 6th grade, and she's trying to steal my new BFF from me! She's been trash talking me to Brooke! She's being nice to me in school though. (She only trash talks me to Brooke.) Anyways, She doesn't know that Brooke told me everything that she's said about me. She even talked about my guyfriend once! She been telling lies about me AND she tells EVERYONE ALL of my secrets! I've never told anyone one of her secrets! I don't want to be friends with her anymore, but if I tell her, it will just end with even MORE drama. Any Advice? Sincerly, Brooke'sBFF4Life (Hopefully)

report

by Brooke'sBFF4Life on 2/14/2010 2:51:14 PM

 
 

~MOD MOD MOD MOD~
i have been begging my parents to move. Cuz i feel like the people at my school dont understand me and they have a really bad impression and its effecting everything there was a bad rumor that came all the way from elementary school and it completly messed everything up. And ive really changed emotionaly and physically and people think something thats not true anymore. How can i really convince my parents that moving would help? ( i already gave them a couple reasons)

 

Hey girl,

 

I'm really sorry you feel that way at school.  Unfortunately, there are bigger things at play here that may not let your parents move: money reasons, your parents' jobs, etc.  It's hard to deal with school sometimes, but if you feel like the verbal abuse is getting to be too much, try talking to a guidance counselor or your parents.  Explain just what they say and how it makes you feel.  Tell your parents that you understand if they can't move right now, but ask if there are any alternatives - homeschooling, switching districts, etc.  As long as they know how rough of a time you're having, there might be something they can do.

Lauren C.

report

by lildrama on 2/12/2010 7:47:23 PM

 
 

no fair you should tell her to tell the truth or your guys friendship is over

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by gracie123789 on 2/6/2010 12:28:47 PM

 
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