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My friend copies me all the time!

 
Sometimes she’ll even lie about herself, just to be more like me. Most of the time, my mom will tell me to take it as a compliment. I don’t see how this is a compliment because it is so aggravating! I don’t want to start drama or hurt her feelings, but I’m getting tired of it. She’s never herself anymore. I’m afraid to confront her because she will be very upset about this.

Hey there, girly! Sorry to hear about the frustrating sitch. I remember when my little sister and cousins used to copy me. It doesn’t seem like a biggie, but it can be way annoying after a while. But no worries, chicky, there are a few things you can do to help ease the situation.
Mom knows best

Mom’s been through all the stuff you’re dealing with now, so she usually understands more than you think. I know, cliché, right? But really, what your mom’s saying does hold some truth, so it’s important to understand what she’s saying. Your friend admires and respects you enough that she wants to be like you. As annoying as it is, copying is a funny version of flattery. 

Encourage her individuality

Before you address the sitch, try clueing her in on what’s up. When you’re out for lunch or ice cream, tell her you’re still deciding and let her order first. When you’re hitting up the mall, pick something for yourself, but point out a different top that looks great on her. Little things like this that encourage her to make her own choices may (hopefully!) lead her to stop copying you as much.

One-on-one

I know you don’t wanna confront her about it, but if she doesn’t figure it out on her own, you may have to tell her yourself. Next time you’re hangin’ out, talk to her about it. It doesn’t have to be angry or upsetting, just calmly explain how you feel. Let her know you don’t want to hurt her feelings because she’s a great friend. But, sometimes you feel like she copies you, and you want her to feel comfortable just being herself. You love her just the way she is!

If she gets upset, just be there for her. Explain you still want to be friends, but she needs to be her own person and you’ll be there to help. What are friends for anyway?

Good luck!
~Kristen Y. <3
 
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POSTED ON 7/7/2010 11:25:00 AM

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