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42 Comments | Add Yours

My parents are ruining my social life!

 

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I love hanging with my friends, but I’m always missing out on stuff. My parents let me out with my friends at least once or twice a month, but if I saw them one day this week, I don’t get to see them for about another month.
 
They always say it’s all about me, but they're not thinking about me! They say they do everything they can for me, but then they say, I’m not your driver,” or "I’m too tired," or "I’m busy." They always let my brother out when he was my age, so why not me? I think they just don’t want me to have a life.

It’s really frustrating to deal with parents who seem to want to keep you from having a life. Honestly, you have to remember that parents usually know best (as annoying as that sounds). Try putting yourself in their shoes. If they’re trying to keep you from doing things or seeing certain people, it may be because they don’t think they’re a good influence on you. It’s even worse when they set different standards for you than your older sibs! While this isn’t always fair, consider that maybe you’re brother’s decisions have influenced their parenting techniques.
   
Have a chat with your ‘rents to let them know how upset you really are. In a mature and non-confrontational manner, let them know that you feel left out and you think it’s unfair that your brother got to go out all the time when he was your age. Ask why it has to be any different for you. And then actually listen to what they have to say.
   
Work with them to see if you can come to some sort of compromise.  Try setting some “rules” to follow for yourself, and show them that they can trust you. Tell them that school will obviously always come first, and then follow up your commitment and make sure your chores and grades are your first priority.

With a bit o’ time, your parents will gradually give you more and more freedom as you get older. Be patient and just remember that fighting back and kicking and screaming along the way won’t help you get what you want.

GOT YOUR OWN FAMILY FEUD? CLICK HERE to submit your own problem to be answered on Girl Talk!

BY NATALIE VARGAS ON 9/9/2010 11:43:00 AM

POSTED IN my parents are way-strict

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Mod Mod Mod: I feel the same way. My parents check my text because I snuck to the bathroom to text. They don't let me wear makeup and they don't approve my friends because THEY wear makeup and text too much. Also they won't let me shave and I really need to. What should I do?




Hey girlie, ask them why they're doing what they're doing. If you understand their reasoning it will be easier for you to convince them otherwise. 

Lauren T.

report

by CaliGurlz1999 on 1/1/2011 8:20:41 PM

 
 

Mod Mod Mod!!!
Ok, My mom always complains I am anti social but when I ask if I could go to my friends house, or my friend calss and invites me over she always is all, you are so inconvinient and is ticked off the rest of the day. She also limits my phone convos to 20 mins max. Our bill isn't by minute (house phone) but just a flat fee. I also said if there was another call I would tell my friend there was one and get the next call. It doesn't fly with her. What do I do to keep my social life alive. I tried to have a talk with her. I asked "Are you busy because I need to talk to you." She said no. But when I started talking about the subject she said I was over reacting. I just told her what I have told you, but even less rude! What do I do to make her understand??




Hey! If she says you are anti social tell her  that you try to make plans but she says that they are inconvenient. good luck! 

 

Helen S.

report

by spazzysarah on 12/5/2010 2:32:19 PM

 
 

Mod mod mod my mom is really nice and supportive. She always takes my wishes into consideration, but I have a really hard time asking her for things. Especially stuff like makeup. I love experimenting with it, but only have a little, and wanted to ask my mom for some for Christmas. I just can't do it though. I don't know why. Is there a way I can be more forward with my mom?

 

Hey girl, I know it can be hard to be assertive and say what you want.  But if your mom is nice and supportive, she is a great person to practice speaking up to!  You can talk to her sometime when you are hanging out, or even when you are out shopping.  Tell her exactly what you told me - you are interested in experimenting with make-up, and you would like some for Christmas.  I'm sure she will be happy to talk to you about it! 

Marie H.

report

by googie on 11/22/2010 4:07:07 PM

 
 

I kno all my dad wants me to do is study study study no friends i've never had hun out with my friends after shcool cuz of tht its so annoying

report

by Gabs102 on 11/18/2010 10:03:24 PM

 
 

mod
my mom got me eyeliner for Halloween and my friends all agreed i looked pretty with it on so i asked my mom if i could wear it to school. she said no. i asked if i could wear it after school. she said no. i asked if i could wear on the weekends and she said no. i asked her why and my mom said said that she couldn't wear makeup until her freshman year but all of my friends wear makeup and i think its really unfair that i can't even wear it on the WEEKENDS!!!! i've talked to my makeup-y friend and she said try to give reasons why i want to wear makeup and i did that and my mom didn't give. all i can wear is clear mascara (so no one can see it) and lip gloss (which i wipe off within 5 minutes). what do i do?

 

It seems like your mom isn't going to budge on this one, so you don't want to push too hard to be able to wear makeup. You'll probably just have to wait until she lets you. However, you could say that if you were allowed to wear makeup, you could have her approve it before you go out to school or on the weekend. Or, you could offer to add on to your chores in exchange for being able to wear makeup, or something like that. Make sure you're grown-up and polite about asking, and if she says no, don't argue or keep bringing it up.

Vanessa J.

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by BlackDragon on 11/6/2010 12:03:29 AM

 
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