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ADVICE | FRIENDS | FAB UP YOUR FRIENDSHIP

Making the Distance

 

Everything may seem fine and dandy so far this year, but one thing is missing: your very best friend. Maybe she had to move because of her mom’s job, or her fab new house means a new school. You’re gonna miss her, but here’s how to stay close.
 
Ride the Tech Train
 
In today’s teched-out world, there’s no reason you and your friend can’t remain BFFs. Cells, IM, texts, e-mail and Facebook can help keep your friendship intact. Life can get super busy, so set a time in stone to chat each week.
 
Make Nice Much?
 
Refuse to be friendless when your opportunities are endless! Make it your mission to mingle with the masses. Get out there and be sociable. Like a butterfly.
 
Hit the Road
 
Why not spread those wings on over to your BFF’s new digs! Whether she’s one town over or clear across the country, consider planning a visit. For faraway BFFs, talk to your parents about letting you make the trip.
 
No Cloning Around
 

When making new acquaintances, no comparisons. OK? No one will be a carbon copy of her, and would you even want that?

BY LATOYA EVANS ON 9/20/2010 12:00:00 AM

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27 Comments | Add Yours
SORT: OLDEST FIRST | NEWEST FIRST
 

My friend recently moved to another country. I feel horrible because i told her everything and now its really expensive to buy international phone cards. I really want to talk to her and i havent seen her for three months. What do i do?

by hypershrimp on 11/20/2010 2:14:44 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD. This summer I was growing a friendship with a girl who made me laugh and I had very good times around her. In August I lost contact with her for a good while - I later found out from a trustworthy friend that this "friend" of mine had called me a 'greasebag' behind my back. Now we're back in school again, and I always find that she looks at me as if I'm a puny little speck. Its as if she forgot all of our good times together in a wink! Now the same girl is hanging out with my best friends more.. I want to know how to become friends with her again so that I can join in when my best friends & her hang out. I hope you can help me with this crazy situation! xoxo, taylorswiftfan

 

Hey it doesnt sound like you should be the one trying to be her friend. If she talks badly about you, she should be the one trying to win you back!

Lindsay S.

by graceswizzle on 11/10/2010 4:14:55 PM

 
 

im afraid of loosing my friendship with my firends becasue i had to change schools, and its been like a month since then but we still see eachother, but the've been acting really wierd, they are not the same anymore i dont know if its just my imagination or if its really happening and i dnt want the distance to change things, i dont know what to do or what to think Frown

by candshop on 11/7/2010 7:16:35 PM

 
 

mod mod mod!
I have a friend who is making some really poor decisions in life, she is one of my best friends, and i am really worrying, i promised not to tell anyone about her problems, what should i do??

 

Hey girl, 

Even though you told her you wouldn't tell anyone, sometimes telling someone trustworthy is the better thing to do, especially if the decisions are really hurting her life and will have bad long- or short-term effects. I would talk to your mom about the problems to see what she can do. Let her know that you weren't supposed to tell anyone, but you need help and trust her to help you know what's best for your friend. I wouldn't talk to other friends at school about your friend's problems, though. You could also try to talk to your friend about the decisions she is making or suggest that she talks to someone if she is going through a rough patch.

Vanessa J.

by LissieLou on 11/5/2010 9:58:04 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD!!! ok so i was good friends with this girl (lets call her Bella) ever since kindergarten (im in 7th grade now). well, last year (6th grade) was a big change for her, and now she is basically the most popular girl in the grade. the prob is, the other day in the hall, i saw bella and she was standing there waiting for someone, so i said hi bella in a good enough loud voice, and she TOTALLY IGNORED ME! then my friend who was friends with bella too said hi and she ignored her too! i feel so sad when i see bella now Frown she also ignores my texts. is there any way to tell her how i feel? PLEASE HELP!!

 

Send her a text explaining that just because she is popular now doesn't mean she should forget who her friends always have been. Sometimes when people get popular like that they forget the things that really matter.

Lindsay S.

by twilightlvr3 on 11/2/2010 12:13:10 PM

 
 

*MOD*
hi!this year one my besties from middle school (we've been buds since 6th grd) and i went to different HS's (lets call her amy). My other friend from elementary school (who i've stayed close to) went to the same high school as my other bud (lets call her mary). so i was talking to "amy" on the phone the earlier and i mentioned something about how mary and i were talking and their APHG class was way ahead of ours. anyway, it ends up mary sits behind amy in math and amy thinks she a weirdo! when she asked her last name and i told her, her immediate response was "wait does she have some acne on her nose and not wear any makeup?"enough said. she told me how mary is obnoxious, etc which bothered me cuz ive known her since kindergarten and shes a great friend. amy is just being judgemental and she doesnt even know this girl! i dont know what i should do cuz i don't want to start a rift but i dont want her judging mary. i doubt she'll give her a chance. any advice? thanks so much! xoxo




Hey chickie,

It's natural for us to want all of our different friends groups to get along perfectly... but the truth is, that's not always the case. And that's ok! I doubt you can force Amy to see Mary for exactly who she is or to become besties with her, but try letting her know how good of a friend Mary is - regardless of any shallow things Amy might have judged her on - and how much of a history you guys have. By letting her know she is a good person, you might be able to make her think twice the next time she wants to say something about her. Emphasize to Amy as well that you value both of your friendships a lot so, if she wants to gossip about Mary or anyone else, tell her not to do it around you. And definitely dedicate yourself to keeping both friendships going - it takes work when you all go to different schools, but it's worth it when you're so close to each other!
Lauren C.

by fencingchic101 on 10/18/2010 9:09:38 PM

 
 

MOD !!! my friends and i go out a lot and we need money to go to the places we go. We are going to a haunted house for halloween and need money fast!! what are some fast ways to make some money?




Hey girl, babysitting and petsitting are two great ways!

xoxo 
Alyssa B.

by tay12zdot on 10/12/2010 7:48:40 PM

 
 

mod we had to split up into groups in social studies today. There was no paper near my desk before we split up, but when I can back there was a yellow paper near it. One of my guy friends told me that something bad was written about me on it. It seems like he might have a crush on me(I know this not just from this experience). Do you think he was trying to tell me something?

 

Hmm, it's hard to say for sure just from hearing that situation!  If you are interested in him, you could try flirting with him or spending more time with him to see.  You might also want to read this for more clues on how to tell if he's into you: http://www.girlslife.com/post/2009/09/16/advice-love-crush-dating.aspx

Marie H.

by pandagirl12 on 10/11/2010 7:09:47 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD
ok so I have a major friend dilemma! Two of my best friends keep on copying everything I say or wear. I dont wanna tell them cuz I dont wanna hurt their feelings or I dont want them to think Im full of myself Please help!!




hey! It might be annoying, but it;s just a phase and they WILL grow out of it. Take it as a copliment for now and ride it out until they discover themselves more. 

Helen S.

by pink and purple girl on 10/10/2010 2:10:43 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD!
I want to be the best friend ever- i've made some big mistakes with my friends, so i really want to make up for it, i want to start over. How can i be an amazing friend ?




You have to be there for your friends. Always be supportive and always be willing to listen. Also NEVER talk behind their backs. EVER. It always back fires. If youre sweet and honest and a good listener, youll be a great friend. Good luck! xoxo kerra 
Kerra S.

by prettyinpinkox on 10/9/2010 9:18:41 PM

 
 

My BFF is going 2 a different middle school and were in the 6th grade! Its been hard, mostly cause she doesnt have internet, a cell, or any other way to contact me in tech. sooooo we send letters 2 each other in code.Its also keeping our friendship interesting cause of the drama in both schools, its been zbwly (super) fun.

by PrettyPrincess4evr on 10/2/2010 10:25:35 PM

 
 

i understand how u feel. i had no friends last year. this year is a little better but none are a bff to me... im open and super social but nothing seems to work. i just want them to trust me and be honest like other bffs are.. i must be doing something wrong?

by sunshine(: on 9/27/2010 7:11:45 PM

 
 

i understand how u feel... last year i couldnt keep any friends waht so everFrown this year is getting a little better! i have friends but none of them are a bff... what can i do to seal the deal. i want them to trust me and be honest wit me but nothing seems to work nomatter how hard i try?

by sunshine(: on 9/27/2010 7:08:01 PM

 
 

MOD!
I can't find a good BFF anywhere I go through friends faster than asnyone I know! My parents are getting frustrated because one day I'm making plans with one girl the next day I'm saying I don't wanna go to the movies with her. I just want somebody to be there for me but I don't even think it's possible! Help me! How can I have a solid BFF?

 

Hey girlie, give these new friends a chance. Hang out with them more before you decide they're not a good friend. A good BFF is hard to find and you can't force it. Find yourself a group of friends that you love to hang out with and wait for your BFF soulmate to find you.

Lauren T.

by shyningstar on 9/26/2010 11:13:40 PM

 
 

one of my bffs moved like 48 hours away....

by chicka678 on 9/21/2010 9:52:15 PM

 
 

My best friend moved across the country this summer!! I miss her so much! Im trying to convince my parents to let me visit her, but its a 36 hour drive with no stops and airplain tickets start at like $350....

by kdr5105 on 9/21/2010 7:35:21 PM

 
 

my BFF moved 8 hours away 2 and half years ago Frown
but our parents are good friends and my little sister and her little brother are best friends so every summer we get together and spend a week together. Smile))

by swimstar27 on 9/21/2010 6:43:19 PM

 
 

My BFF moved to a town 9 hours away last month Frown She came up a couple days and went apple picking, tho. It was supper fun Smile)

by yellowducky2713 on 9/20/2010 11:18:03 PM

 
 

MOD MOD!!
this came in perfect timing-- my BFF is moving to Washington, Seattle.......im gonna miss her so much!!! thx 4 this. BTW: my question, what if my friend forgets me aftr she moves? shes a little older than me!

 

You and your BFF can stay close by becoming pen pals or keeping in touch other ways! Every once in a while you can send each other pics of what you've been up to and letters! I have friends all over the country, and we stay close by writing letters and ichatting or skyping. Ask your parents if you can download ichat or skype and you and your friend will be able to "see" each other all the time!

Bridget R.

by istylista on 9/20/2010 9:37:07 PM

 
 

my friends have never moved away =]

by princess24 on 9/20/2010 8:47:37 PM

 
 

MOD! Thanks a ton(:

 

No problem!  So glad I could help.  xoxo

Marie H.

by friendsrforever on 9/20/2010 8:10:33 PM

 
 

MOD! Thanks a ton. I was just freaking out!(: By the way, this goes along with my ? before, i always feel guilty for the smallest things, and it drives me crazy. I can't stop though,i try to. Do you have any ideas of how i can stop?

 

Hey girl, sometimes we feel guilty when we are being way too hard on ourselves.  Sometimes, we do make mistakes, and it's good to recognize them and learn from them - then move on.  But if you find yourself feeling guilty for something you really don't need to, try to stop yourself.  Remind yourself that you are doing fine, and don't have to be perfect all the time.  Sometimes it can help to get a second perspective, so talk to an adult or friend you trust if you find yourself stuck in guilty mode. 

Marie H.

by friendsrforever on 9/20/2010 7:41:15 PM

 
 

MOD! Hey. Okay, soooo, my bff is friends with a guy who likes me, she wasnt supposed ot tell me he likes me,but she did. And i told my other bff cause i had to tell her seomthing, and to make what i said make sense, i had to tell her the guy liked me. Should i feel guilty? My best friend said she wouldnt tell anyone,promise. My best friend that told me said 'I shouldnt tel youu...cause hellm get mad.. dont tell any1. I really shouldnt have told!!!!!What do i do??

 

Hey girl, I wouldn't be too hard on yourself - it can be hard to keep a secret like that from your BFFs!  You just don't want it to get spread around, because then he might be embarassed.  But as long as you can trust your BFFs, I think it will be okay. 

Marie H.

by friendsrforever on 9/20/2010 7:28:29 PM

 
 

My Bffs and I write letters to each other and sometimes put bracelets, small stuff like that in them. It's so much fun making them and getting them. We also text, etc.

by Sasza on 9/20/2010 5:24:08 PM

 
 

This never worked for me and my not-so-much bff

by Photochickie on 9/20/2010 2:54:53 PM

 
 

Mod mod mod
I feel so bad, I just went to high school this year and today I got m year book from an old teacher and I was on the commitee and well I typed up the page for do the grade eights remeber when and well one of the things were when in grade two when (our teacher) ate the part of the banana peel instead of the banana . I didn't make he stuff up but I typed it ( my teach said to ask everyone one for ideas) and other people wrote em on losse leaf and I typed it and it wasent true and now I feel horrbile but I wasent my idea and the teacher ( my teacher ) even looked at the page . I feel so so so bad . But I only typed it , but still .




Hey girl! Your best bet in this case is to thank your teacher for sending you the yearbook and also to apologize for the error in it. Since it wasn't true, you should definitely apologize for the mistake made.
Abby L.

by Awesomegal on 9/20/2010 2:01:03 PM

 
 

••••• Smile Hey girls! Check out my profile, featuring my blog in the Healthy You section, which has discussion questions for every topic and the Random Question of the Day!! I update it all the time so check it out and drop me a comment!! Smile •••••

SmileabbySmile

by singdancewrite1015 on 9/20/2010 7:43:24 AM

 
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