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My Friend is Bugging Me

I have this one friend; let's call him Joe. He’s amazingly sweet and funny. Then I have this other friend, let's call her Lisa. Lisa has recently started hanging out with Joe and me during lunch, and now she's getting really annoying. She'll ask Joe "Would You Rather" questions, like would he rather go out with Lisa or me. Sometimes Joe says me, and then Lisa will say loudly, "Joe likes you!" even though he's just a friend.


The questions make me really uncomfortable, and I'm sure Joe feels the same way. I wish I could get her to stop, but she doesn't take me seriously. How can I seriously—but nicely, tell her to stop with the dating questions?

Hey girl, I totally feel your pain. It's so not cool when friends give you a hard time about a crush, especially when you don’t have a crush to begin with. It's pretty embarrassing for you and pretty rude on your friend's part. Unfortunately, she probably doesn't even know she's bothering you, so you're going to have to let her know her behavior is not cool.

Trading places

Ask Lisa if you can talk to her in private and then say, "I know you probably don't mean anything by it, but I get really embarrassed when you ask Joe those dating questions." If that's not enough to get her to stop, also ask her, "How would you like that if I did that to you?" Chances are, she probably wouldn't like it very much. Teasing–even if it's meant in a fun way–isn't very fun when the shoe is on the other foot.

Damage control

Boys can sometimes be a little clueless, so it's entirely possible Joe doesn't even realize what's going on. Instead of having a serious discussion, try making a joke out of it to lighten up the situation. You could say, "Wow, I wish Lisa would start asking some new questions." Or, "I'm really sorry she keeps bothering you, I'm trying to get her to stop." This way he'll see you’re cool and calm (not to mention funny). If you make a big deal out of it and turn into a drama queen, you'll send him running for the hills in no time!

Let's be friends

There's an old saying, "What can't we all just get along?" Hopefully, after you've talked to Lisa and Joe separately, there will be no more awkward questions and everyone can eat lunch in peace. But if Lisa keeps asking annoying questions, then the best thing you and Joe can do is ignore her. If she's not getting the reaction she wants, most likely she'll lose interest in her little game. Remember, you have control over your emotions, not her. Best of luck, hon!

Lots of love,
FRIENDS GOT YOU FRANTIC? CLICK HERE to submit your own problem to be answered on Girl Talk.    

BY L'OREAL THOMPSON ON 10/29/2010 7:00:00 AM


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