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My parents punish me instead of helping me



I’m having some serious issues with my parents. I feel like they just don’t understand me when I do something wrong or forget something.

 

And instead of encouraging me to make the right decisions and remember things, they turn to punishment like taking away my cell phone and iPod.

 

I feel kinda hopeless. I want to make them proud but it seems as though nothing will.

 

Sounds like you’re going through a tough time, girl. I remember feeling like my parents just didn’t get me, too. Often times, this is just a phase that you and your parents will eventually outgrow. But that doesn’t mean there’s noting you can do about it.

 

Often times what happens is that parents overreact to kids doing something wrong, and then kids overreact to the punishment. Perhaps your parents should give you a chance to explain yourself. And when they punish you, instead of feeling hopeless, perhaps you could try to explain yourself more calmly.

 

Don't just get angry and frustrated, but try calmly telling them how you feel. If they understand that you want to make better decisions, and that negative reinforcement is not having their desired effect, you can come up with a solution together that involves positive reinforcement.

 

Your parents do want what’s best for you, so try to have a conversation about this without getting upset and voice yourself in a way that they can understand. Good luck!
 
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BY LINDSEY SILKEN ON 12/27/2010 7:00:00 AM

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MOD MOD MOD
okay so i'm a 8th grader and i have a freind who is a senior and recently we have gotten realy close and so shes like my sister so her 18th b-day is coming up and she realy wants me to go and i realy want to go to. the problem is i will be one of the youngest. also her dad will not be there but her older brother and his feance will be shaperoning there will also be a cupple other shaperons my parents know her brother and feance and another one of the shaperons. also this is a girl guy allnighter. do you have any tips on how i should ask my parents?




Hey girlie,

Try bringing up the idea of the party to them and explain maturely how much she means to you as a friend. If they seem skeptical or a little hesitant, that's ok. Give them her brother and his fiance's contact info so they can talk to them and ask any questions they might have. Remember to be calm and don't throw a fit, even if they say no. It's their decision at the end of it so you have to respect them... but being 100% honest with them about the entire thing will make them trust you more and they'll be more likely to say yes!
Lauren C.

by alaina978978 on 2/14/2011 7:54:54 PM

 
 

saammeee heerreee):

by peacelovecandy on 2/7/2011 8:12:58 PM

 
 

aww that suckss girliee, i hope things work outt!

by lili545 on 1/23/2011 9:58:16 PM

 
 

MOD MOD! PLEASE HELP! my mom is so mean to me! im in 8th grade, and my family just moved a half an hour away from where we used to live, and my mom PROMISED, as in a REAL promise, that we would NOT move until AFTER 8th grade, so i could be with my friends and graduate together and go on a feild trip to cedar point at the end of the year, but she totaly went against every promise she made to me in the past 6 months. she promised that she would drive me to my old neighborhood to see my old friends whenever i needed to,and i know that one is hard, but she stll broke it anyway, and i was just at my friends birthdat party,where she tried to pick me up early (but she ended up being late)just so she could take me home and hang out with her friends, even though i was at my friends party, THAT SHE HAS BEN PLANING ALL YEAR, just so she could go out with her friends(which she decided to do like on friday)!! i always tell her how i feel and she denies it! PLS HELP!




Hey girlie. Talk to her again. Make sure you don't come at her aggressively and instead voice your opinion calmly. If you're still having problems getting through to your mom, try talking to a guidance counselor at school.  
Marly Z.

by emscool1234 on 1/22/2011 9:26:54 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD My mom told me she doesn't trust me anymore since I've been getting in trouble a lot. She keeps repeating stuff like what am I going to do when your 15 and stuff. I really wanna gain her trust back. Any advice?

 

 

Hey chica! The best way you can earn her trust back is through your actions. Avoid getting in trouble, and show her how responsible you are. Do well in school, be respectul and follow the rules. And, help her out around the house when you can Smile

xxx

Becca G.

by Soccergirl68 on 1/20/2011 6:43:41 PM

 
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