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ADVICE | ALL ABOUT YOU | GIRL TALK

How do I stop the drama?


 

I don't know how to deal with drama. I was the victim in sixth grade, but this year I’m either put in the middle or not sure if I’m the one causing it.

 

I get comments like, "Wow, I can't believe you hurt her feelings." I feel really bad and I have said sorry many times, but it doesn't seem to change anything.

 

There’s always going to be drama, and it’s a process to learn how to deal with it and avoid it. When drama is unavoidable, it’s important not to get caught up in it. If the people around you are feuding, be the peaceful one who encourages everyone else to listen and calm down.

 

If you can’t seem to figure out what to say when you’re put in the middle of a sticky sitch, let your friends know that you feel stuck and wish they wouldn’t put you in that position.

 

But if you’re actually starting the drama, it’s time to take a step back. You have good intentions and don’t want to create bad feelings among your friends, so take a min to think about when and why those situations arise. In the future, try to spot those situations ahead of time and think before you speak or act.

 

Treat your friends with sensitivity—the way you would want to be treated. We each have different sensitivities, so try to think about where your friends are coming from and what upsets them. Does one friend have weight issues? Does another feel insecure about guys? Think about what topics are touchy and steer clear or speak respectfully.
 
ARE YOU THE ONE CAUSING ALL THE DRAMA? CLICK HERE to submit your own problem to be answered on Girl Talk!

BY LINDSEY SILKEN ON 1/7/2011 11:22:00 PM

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Hey guys I have a club called We R Heros! Please join!!!!Smile

by fashionlife on 6/22/2011 10:23:04 PM

 
 



Mod Mod..
So.. my friend is gettin bullied over the internet. And im getting really mad at the people who are doing it. My friend didnt doing anything wrong and these two girls totally flipped on her. I dont know what to do because i dont want to get into trouble if i get into the fight to help my friend. But i also dont want to leave my friend hanging there getting bullied by two mean girls which are older than us. What should i do?




Hey girl,

It's definitely not a good idea to stoop to their level and "get into the fight." Even though it's on the internet, you can still ask for help from adults in your life! Read this advice from Jordan Goldman, founder of Unigo.com and host of a live webcast panel about bullying in the fall:

GL: What advice can you give to victims of bullying?
Victims of bullying need to know they're not alone. There are people and organizations that want to help them, and can help make the bullying stop. But the first step is for the victims of bullying to reach out, to speak with someone—a teacher or a counselor—and make them aware of the problem. Once they're aware, there are things that can be done. Too many students suffer in silence, and the bullying only gets worse. We need to encourage more conversation, more awareness, so we can have earlier prevention. 




This article might also help. The fact that they're bullying her over the internet says A LOT - it means they're too chicken to do it in person, which means they're actually really insecure. They're hiding behind their computer screens, so standing up to them in person will be even more powerful!



Lauren C.

by abbygirl12 on 2/21/2011 5:57:30 PM

 
 

Same thing happens to me all the time this girl hates me and she told everbody my biggest secret! We got back at her because she told her mom that I called her the B word then I got in trouble for nothing!!!! We fake dated these 7 guys that she like me and my friends did. Now she hates me and I kinda hate her too so we just stay away from her actually everybody hates her so what im saying is just stay away from people who you know will diss you and if they do well if your Best guy friend is the cutest boy in school than diss her back!!!!!!!

by bucktoothmunchkin14 on 1/13/2011 5:49:49 PM

 
 

Hey chicas! This is Happy. I love giving advice- ask me anything- I’ll give you advice on school, boys, clothes, style, makeup, hair, beauty, family, friends, parties and other hangouts, gifts, jobs, workouts, eating, health, accessories, your body, entertainment, hobbies, after-school, depression, drama of any kind, difficult situations, holidays, bullies, and anything else you want help figuring out! Ask your question on my profile, and I’ll post your question with well-thought out advice underneath on your wall ASAP!
<3

by Ask Happy on 1/12/2011 9:48:58 PM

 
 

Please help me... The last time my school held a Social, people passed around mean gossip about me and my friend. What should I if it happens on the Prom?




Hey girlie. I'm sorry to hear that. People are only as strong as you allow them to be. So if they spread nasty rumors about you at prom you have to keep a smile on your face and act as if it doesn't bother you. Make 'em wondering why you're still smiling. That's true greatness. If it gets really bad, go up to the person that is talking about you and say, "The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about." And then walk confiently away. If people realize that they cannot bring you down or make you feel badly about yourself, they will realize your strangth and move on. I'm not saying don't stand up for yourslelf. I am saying that actions speak louder than words. : ) 
Elizabeth P.

by SceneQueen98 on 1/11/2011 6:22:36 PM

 
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