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ADVICE | FAMILY | TOUGH STUFF FAMILY

25 Comments | Add Yours

My parents want to adopt another kid

 

Check these out, too...

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My parents are talking about adopting a kid. I think it’s a great idea, in theory. But I’m not sure how I really feel about it. What do you think?

 

Adoption is a tricky thing, especially since it’s not just one person that has to be considered. If your ‘rents haven’t talked to you about it seriously, you should suggest a family meeting. This should be a choice you and your family make together.

 

A new sib

Having a sibling is fun. While it does take some getting used to, it’s nice to have a brother or a sister that you can talk to and hang out with. Depending on what age child your parents are considering adding to the family, your responsibilities could vary. An infant or toddler might mean lotsa babysitting, while an older kid might tag around with you at school or on outing with friends. Remember, though: When you bring someone new into your family, that special someone will probably come with emotional baggage—and that’s not a bad thing. Just something else to consider.

 

A stranger in the family

Ask yourself if you’re really willing to open your arms to someone you’ve never met before. Having a guest for the weekend is one thing, but adoption is for forever. Could you share the bathroom, the dinner table and time with your family with a new person? Could you welcome this person into your inner circle and treat him or her like a real member of the family?

 

Only child?

If you’re an only child, adoption can be particularly hard. When you already have siblings, you know what it means to share toys, clothes, space and your parents’ attention. But when it’s just been you for your entire life, it’s hard to imagine what the changes in your household will really feel like. Sure, it may seem selfish to ask, “What about me?”, but refusing to consider the sitch until problems arise in the future is asking for trouble.

 

Give this one careful thought, sweetie, and talk it out with your parents and adoption counselors and agencies. Adoption is an incredible thing—giving someone a home and a family!—but it may or may not be the right choice for your family. Don’t be afraid to sound selfish or mean when you ask questions. This isn’t just about your parents or the child you guys might welcome into your fam; it’s about you, too.
 
GOT YOUR OWN FAMILY FEUD? CLICK HERE to submit your own problem to be answered on Girl Talk!  
 
 

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BY BRITTANY TAYLOR ON 8/31/2011 3:53:00 PM

POSTED IN family, problems with my parents, adopt, how to talk to parents

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25 Comments | Add Yours
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***MOD*** I'm in DESPERATE need of a second opinion right now. My friend (15 years old) has had the toughest time as of late with just life and stuff. Her parents have done some pretty crazy things for her "own good" that even I have to agree are a stretch. But now, she's told me that she wants to run away with her boyfriend. This isn't just some random guy though, they've dated for almost two years and they are really in love. However, I KNOW that running away isn't the answer!!! There is no way for them to support themselves and they will cause major heartbreak (me included). She trusts me more than anyone else and only told me because I'm the only one she trusts. However, I know this isn't right and I'm HATING the situation I'm in right now because no matter what I say I feel like I'm talking to a wall. Did I mention I'm really stressed already to begin with so now this is putting me on edge?!!? What do I DO? HELP!!! Cry

 

Hey girlfriend, you're right, running away is defintely not the answer! We defintely need to get her some help, maybe you could refer her to your school counselor. She probably needs to get away from her family, so see if she can spend some weekends with you, because you seem like you're a pretty positive influence in her life. Whenever you get the chance try to talk her out of it. Hope this helps ya!!! Smile

Lynae P.

report

by whitedress26 on 9/17/2011 4:22:50 PM

 
 



MOD!
my parents think i dress innapropitly even though i just dress like a NORMAL 13 year old girl. They sometimes have fights about what i wear, yell at me for it and take some of my "innapropiate" clothes away...they recently even took away all of my skirts! they tell me i cant waer the same things and its embaressing to think about and i get really mad that them...i mean i have a good reason right? I think all of this is getting into my self esteem and social life too how do i get them to stop? im never going to trust them if the keep sneaaking around like this behind my back! my friends dont even believe this when i tell them because we dress a lot alike and their parents have no problem at all with it! what do i do?




Try sitting them down (when you guys are having a good time/when things are positive) and talk to them about how you feel. Explain your self-esteem issues and ask them their reasoning and if there is any way you guys can compromise Smile




Brittany G.  
Brittany G.

report

by kmbarrette on 9/17/2011 10:03:13 AM

 
 


MOD MOD MOD
i think my older sis is anorexic.and im also angry because shes always been thin, even wen she did eat, and ive always been the bigger one, the uglier one, the one who doesnt get any guys, and it seems as if im more confident than HER, and theres been countless times ive cried myself to sleep becuz of tht, but i wood NEVER become anerexic just cuz ive gained a lil weight, also, my sis has (or had) depression, n wen she was 13 or 14 she started cutting, and i think she stopped, and now shes 16, shes gorgeous, shes thin, she has big boobs, and a hot bf, and SHES anorexic, im just so angry, sad, confused, worried, idk to break down and cry or scream in her face and knock her out, what am i supposed to do?!?!?


 


Hey girly! It sounds like you have a really good head on your shoulders, which I'm very glad to hear. As for your sister, though, you definitely need to talk an adult about this and let them know what's going on with her. Try talking to your parents about it. Show them the site and let them know how worried you are. If you can't talk to them, I'd talk to an aunt or uncle, a grandparents, or even a friend's parent that you trust. Also, guidance counselors at school would know what to do. The bottom line is, your sister needs help before this gets any worse.


xxx


 


 


Becca G.

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by guitargirl7321 on 9/11/2011 6:22:35 PM

 
 

MOD!
There's this guy that I met in an after school thing when I was in 8th grade and he was in 7th, and now he's a freshman at my high school. We didn't talk much except for when we were at our volleyball thing for a couple months, and it was pretty obvious we liked each other. Now whenever I see him, there's this wierd eye contact that I can't figure out. It's like "I know you, but I don't know if you remember me so I'm not gonna say hi but I'm kinda trying to say hi." Idk if it's even that, but I think you know what I mean. Help me figure this guy out? And should I just say hello next time this happens?

 

Hey girl,

Ugh, that is SO awk! I've totally been there. Be the bigger person here and break the ice once and for all. Next time you see him, make eye contact and smile. It's something subtle and simple, but it'll make him feel much less awkward around you. As time goes by and you settle into this routine, start working in a relaxed "Hey!" or a lil wave. It's hard to tell if he still likes you since some time has passed, but by being warm and friendly even in the midst of awkwardness, you'll definitely make him feel more comfy around you. Once you do, you can try talking to him a lil more and picking up on any signs that he might still feel the same Smile

Lauren C.

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by smileysevvie on 9/8/2011 10:11:32 PM

 
 

Hey girlies! Please visit my profile and leave a comment if you want advice on anything! I can give advice on guys, friends, mean girls, popularity, sports, growing up, middle school, tough stuff, beauty, fitness....practically anything! Just leave a comment (i think I said that) and I will answer it as soon as I can.

report

by basketballcutie11 on 9/4/2011 7:38:05 AM

 
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