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My "perfect" parents are keeping secrets

 
Everyone thinks of my parents as the Perfect Couple. They rarely fight. But I recently was at my Grandpa’s when he casually mentioned that both my parents had been married before. We talked about it a few minutes, and then I went home. I am officially upset! I can’t believe they never told me, and I am horrified by the ugly truth. How can I get my parents to tell me about it without ratting on my grandfather.

 

Dear Shocked,

Wow! I don’t blame you for being freaked out. You’re not alone—I’ve gotten similar letters over the years. Unfortunately, your parents weren’t up front with you, so you need to be straight with them. Say, “Grandpa let it slip that you two had previous marriages. Don’t get angry with him, but please tell me the truth.” Then, listen.

 

The truth doesn’t have to be “ugly.” If you want your parents to level with you, be understanding rather than judgmental. No doubt about it, this is mind-boggling. But hang on to your perspective because what hasn’t changed is this: Your parents love each other and love you. As for your parents being the Perfect Couple, there’s no such thing. But perhaps they are and will always be a Great Couple.
 

 

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BY CAROL WESTON ON 9/14/2011 12:00:00 AM

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