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I think my friends are talking about me

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I have three best friends. I’m closer to one than the others. Sometimes she and I talk about the other two. But she and one of the others always ride bikes to school and hang out at each other’s houses. And I’m worried that they talk about me, too.

Dear Upset,

They probably do. But, oh well, you can’t have it both ways. And while they may indeed gossip, I doubt they’re vicious. Don’t worry. As Oscar Wilde said, “There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.”

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BY CAROL WESTON ON 9/27/2011 4:13:00 PM

POSTED IN bust my bestie problem, bad friend, dear carol solves BFF probs, group, I'm feeling left out, can I trust my friend, advice from Carol Weston

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MOD! MOD! MOD!
There's this guy at my school...I like him a lot. We're best friends and always try to wave and say hi and talk to each other at school. Lately he asked me who I liked and I had to lie and say I liked some guy from my church because I was scared that if I told him I liked him, he'd never talk to me again. He seemed cool with it the next day. The day after that I was out sick and my friends said he was in a bad mood that day. The next day I went to school and he was totally IGNORING me. I tried saying hi but all he did was ignore me. He was acting like himself to his other friends, but is acting differently towards me...is he mad at me? What's going on? Should I talk to him? Please help.

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by ObsessiveCharlesDisorder on 10/1/2011 12:14:57 PM

MOD!
There's a guy I haven't seen in awhile that goes to my school now (he's a grade younger) and it was obvious that we both used to kind of like each other. I see him in the halls now, and I know he knows who I am, and I know that he knows that I know who he is (sorry if that didn't make sense...). I don't exactly like him now but I think seeing him again made the old feelings resurface a little bit, if you know what I mean. I think he's in a relationship, although it doesn't say on Facebook, but is there a chance that he feels the same way about me, too? I'm just confused and trying to figure him out.

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by smileysevvie on 10/1/2011 8:07:20 AM

MOD!
At school I started playing football with the boys at recess. Now my best friend has been telling me that all the girls say I'm only playing for the boys and that I'm boy obsessed. They also said I want to get intimate with them, and I don't! I thought I was close with some of the girls who started the rumors, but now I always find my mind wandering on what they think. Please help.

I wouldnt worry what they think. Your actions speak louder than their rumuors. If you play with these guys and dont get "intimate" with any of them then theyll be proved wrong. Dont let it bother you too much. Everyone is gonna have opinions and theyre not always gonna be right. Dont spend too much time worrying about their gossip. xoxo kerra

Kerra S.

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by traptitus on 9/30/2011 5:52:32 PM

MOD MOD MOD!!!!!
I have a friend who's really close, but sometimes... too close. She always has to work with me in school, and if not she gets sad which makes me feel really bad. I luv her, but i wanna hang with my other pals too. What should i do?

Hey girlie,

You just gotta be firm! Try not to feel too bad if you decide to hang out with your other friends sometimes. You obviously owe your bestie some of your time and attention, but you don't need to spend every second with her! In fact, it's healthier to spend some time apart so you keep your friendship fresh. Try subtly suggesting a new club/sport you've seen that reminded you of your friend and, in another convo, describe how much fun you have in your own independent activities - it might help her branch out so she isn't as dependent on you!

Lauren C.

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by ColosalMascara on 9/29/2011 5:57:14 PM