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GUYS | DEAR CAROL

39 Comments | Add Yours

My BF got handsy at the holiday dance


 

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There was a holiday dance, and I was with my BF as usual. He took me into a dark room, where he tried to touch my chest and other inappropriate places. It made me uncomfortable. Should I tell someone?
 

Dear Uncomfortable,

I hope you told him! You could have said, “I don’t want to be in this room,” or “Don’t put your hands there,” or “No, stop, I don’t want to do this. Let’s go back to the dance.” You might have felt uncomfortable saying this, but you felt even more uncomfortable not saying anything, right? It’s important to express your feelings out loud, and just as important for him to listen and respect them. As for telling someone what happened, that’s up to you. Would you feel better talking to your mom or a counselor? Is this romance even right for you? You need to make your BF understand that you felt uneasy by his actions. Make this clear so there won’t be any confusion in the future. If he still attempts to touch you inappropriately after you’ve told him, he’d be most ideal as…an ex-boyfriend.
 
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BY CAROL WESTON ON 12/14/2011 11:00:00 AM

POSTED IN guys, dating advice, GL's best guy advice, boyfriend Q & A, pressure to get physical, too far too fast, dance, advice, advice from Carol Weston

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39 Comments | Add Yours
SORT: OLDEST FIRST | NEWEST FIRST
 

Yeah, my crush life is kinda weird too. I kinda like this one guy and sometimes when I talked to this one other boy, I could sometimes even hear him moan. He also opens the door for me after school. He's only in my math and gym class. This stinks because I am really bad at gym and we never get to talk to anyone in math. So I am still trying to figure out if he definitely likes me or not. Because in gym, he was throwing a dodge ball and threw it at his friend but it hit me in the face instead. Also when we had to have groups for gym, I didn't get put on his team and whenever I get out of the locker rooms, he like stares at me. It's kind of creepy. Also when I was laughing with my friend about something, he was laughing with us too. I turned around and he didn't have any of his friends around so it was akward. There is so much more to this story. But the one thing he doesn't do is talk to me or anything. So I am confused. Does anyone think he likes me?

report

by Gabriella123 on 1/19/2012 10:37:48 PM

 
 

I need help i like this guy and we barely see each other he likes me too. The only tIme i can see him is if my dad were at this meeting then we can see each other wat do i do

report

by hello100zero on 1/13/2012 8:06:56 PM

 
 



Mod!
I'm a nervous wreck. I have finally decided to talk to my crush. Just so he knows I exist. I have no classes with him except gym.. but eww.. I'm sick & tired of hiding in other people"s shadows and crushing from far away. I'm thinking the best time to talk to him would bein the morning by lockers so his friends aren't all there. My besty's locker is right next to his.. is there a way I can man up and talk to him without feeling all scary and freaked out like I'm hyperventilating? Would it be weird/awkward if I introduce myself.. or should I like, just say hi finn or whatever?







Hey girlie,

WOO HOO! Way to go, for making this decision and getting the courage to say something! Smile Try coming up with a compliment to give him or question to ask him, instead of saying hi out of the blue. That'll make you feel a little more confident, which will make the convo go way better! Say something about his awesome three-pointer in the basketball game last weekend, or ask him what activity he's going to play in gym today, etc. Give it a try - it'll get easier each time you do it!
Lauren C.

report

by mimi_girl12 on 1/5/2012 4:49:30 PM

 
 

My Best Friend in the world is in the middle of a love triangle her ex-boyfriend likes her still, this guy in our orchestra class is starting to like her and she still loves her boyfriend now but she sometimes makes her want to pull her hair out. And she's starting to like the guy in our orchestra class but he's super rude to me and she doesn't wanna date him cause I don't like him. And I feel like I'm holding her back what should I do about it and what should my friend do about the three guys?! HELP!

 

Hey girly,

 

You need to tell your friend that she needs to follow her heart on this one. If she feels like she shouldn't be with her boyfriend, then she should break up with him and if she thinks that she can't date someone that is rude to her friends, then she should be able to make that choice. The best that you can do is support your friend and be there for her as she makes her choice. Remember, it is okay to not have a boyfriend at all. Good Luck!

Catie C.

report

by lovepurple244 on 1/3/2012 2:28:49 PM

 
 

MOD!
Okay so I've been dating this guy for about a month and a half. He's my second bf but I'm his first. I really like him but idk if he feels the same about me. Plus we have kissed a couple times but only because my friends made him kiss me. Now whenever I try to kiss him he turns away or moves away from me. What can I do to make him tell me exactly how he feels without pressuring him??
Thanks,
Confused

 

Hey girl,


Since you are his first girlfriend, he might just be shy and nervous about kissing because he's inexperienced. I think you should be straight-up with him and say "Hey, why do you always pull away from me when I try to kiss you?" Hopefully he can explain what's going on.

Kathryn S.

report

by HorseGirl2998 on 12/29/2011 2:58:02 PM

 
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