Possibly the worst feeling in the world? Knowing that your
best-friends-forever bud isn’t as true-blue as you thought. Betrayal is tough
to take, but with a li’l help from GL, you’ll be able to shrug this sorrow off
and hold your head high, hunnie. But hey, a good box of chocolates wouldn’t
When you find out that a friend has stabbed you in the bag,
whether she’s spilled an embarrassing secret or stolen your BF, your gut
reaction will probably be to explode. Contain that fury though, chica, ‘cause
once it’s out there, you won’t be able to take it back. Go on social media
lockdown for at least 24 hours—no angsty FB status updates, no furious
tweeting. The key here is not to create additional drama.
Let it out
It’s time to find a new shoulder to cry on. Maybe it’s Mom,
a sib or another close friend. Choose someone who will be tight-lipped—ideally
an individual that isn’t in the same social circle as your ex-bestie.
When two buds break up, life becomes difficult for them. But
what about for their mutual friends caught in the middle? Don’t punish your
other pals by making them choose between the two of you. Let them stay
neutral—after all, this is your fight, not theirs.
After you’ve had time to cool off, write a letter or email
or talk to your old friend face-to-face. Keep your cool as you tell her how her
actions have made you feel. Remember to breathe and stay calm, and not to
summon accusations. The point is to communicate honestly, not to inspire a
guilt trip (although that’s a pretty good bonus, we’ve gotta admit), so discuss
your feelings rather than her actions.
Focus on forgiveness
I know, easier said than done, right? Still, forgiving your
friend—even if you two are never buddy-buddy again—will help you move on and
start enjoying life again. When you drop the anger you’ve been holding onto,
you’ll feel lighter, less stressed and more willing to strengthen your bonds
with other fab femmes.
BY BRITTANY TAYLOR ON 1/28/2012 12:00:00 AM
POSTED IN bff, bust my bestie problem, bad friend, 411 on fighting with friends, by bestie is spilling my secrets, my friend keeps lying, can I trust my friend