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GUYS | DEAR CAROL

I caught my BF and BFF kissing!


 
I invited my BFF and BF to my house. When I came out of the bathroom, I saw them kissing. What should I do?
 

Dear Betrayed,

That is so lame! And right before your eyes, no less. It’s not uncommon for a girl’s friend and boyfriend to feel a little something for each other. But it’s also common courtesy for them not to act on it! Sounds like you need to find yourself some caring, trustworthy friends. See if you can sign up for at least two activities (sports, band, newspaper, drama club, whatever), and use the opportunity to connect with new girls and guys. As for Romeo and Juliet, they deserve each other—and you definitely deserve better.
 
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BY CAROL WESTON ON 2/22/2012 12:00:00 PM

POSTED IN , , , , , , , , , , ,

< PREVIOUS   NEXT >   

41 Comments | Add Yours
SORT: OLDEST FIRST | NEWEST FIRST
 

MOD MOD MOD !! I need help!\
ok so I have a crush on this guy since we started high school on february. Nobody knows, just my BFF that is in another High school. I have been suffering because he doesn't like me ( i think) but a few weeks ago we've been talking and I think we're now friends. His best friend told me that I liked him but I don't beleive him. Then my friend had a crush on another guy that liked her but they weren't dating. Now my friend told me that she's starting to like my crush but she doesn't know that I like him. Yesterday we were talking and said that he wanted a bracelet that some people were giving away but they were many bracelets. I had one and got another one for him. When my friend and I were talking to him I told him: Hey do you wanted a bracelet?. And then suddenly my friend gave him HER bracelet! I was going to do that Frown I told her and said she was sorry and everything but I wanted to cry! Now she's flirting with him and I don't want to fight with her.

Hey girl,

If she apologized to you and she didn't know you liked him, there's not much you can do. It's not worth losing a friend for a guy, so do your best to be happy for her and scope out a new guy who likes you!

Meghan D.

by Frozencloud02 on 5/26/2012 12:33:46 PM

 
 

I'd slap her.

by Luv_Dance on 4/26/2012 5:44:00 PM

 
 

OMG that is one of the ultimate betrayls i think you deserve a better friend and bf

by aqua27036 on 4/11/2012 5:33:52 PM

 
 

If they do that,they're not friends. U deserve better than that!

by yamoone on 3/21/2012 9:18:28 PM

 
 

If your friend was kissing your boyfriend then she is not a true friend and your boyfriend is not a good boyfriend but i`m sure if you talk to both of them and tell each of them how you feel they will understand

by turtles121400 on 3/8/2012 5:23:09 PM

 
 

that's terrible!! but i dont think we can say anything unless we know all of the circumstances... but that is wrong no matter wat!!!

by 3m2016 on 3/8/2012 4:37:41 PM

 
 

Hey girlie,
Needd to talk about it? Join my club, ANYTHING U WANT!!! All girls should join it. My mom is a counsler and i know a lot. You can talk aboit anything and get support from your other GL friends.
Join it, you wont regret it,
By Ari, A.K.A YayaYuiki

by YayaYuiki on 3/3/2012 1:20:13 PM

 
 

Thats horrible! you should have a long talk with both of them about how that made you feel. be polite but firm when and if you have to make any decision about this situation. i wish you lots of luck!!!!!!!!!!!!
~Moonshadow24<3

by Moonshadow24 on 2/29/2012 4:15:19 PM

 
 

plaese go to my clue: Boys being mean get back at they get fit.
i miss spelled the name of my clue soooo the name i was going for is: Boys being mean get back at them get fit.
Luv. Schoneboom<3

by schoneboom on 2/28/2012 2:59:29 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD
Okay.. (comment hidden by moderator)




Hey girl,

I'm really sorry to hide your comment, but you're right - we can't post your question or answer it in detail. Girls of ALL ages visit GL.com and we have to make sure it is appropriate for all of them, and this topic could make a lot of them feel uncomfortable. But it's normal to be curious and have questions about sex, so please talk to an older family member/counselor/doctor you trust <3
Lauren C.

by <3monkeys<3 on 2/26/2012 2:42:43 AM

 
 

Sucks for them cuz to not have a great friend and girlfriend like you. Just forget them...

by kenzi143 on 2/25/2012 8:05:03 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!
I need help ASAP! okay so i have a boyfriend, we have been going out for like 2 weeks, kissed and all that well last Saturday i met his friend and his friend started to text me. I realized i texted his friend more because my bf was too boring and his friend was just so nice and soo funny! well I might see both tomrrow and idk what to do because i love my bf but i might have feelings for his friend... i know its wrong that why im asking! please help!
Sincerly,
KatieBieber xoxo




Hey babe!

Like you said, you KNOW that flirting with his friend is off limits while you're dating. It's ok to text and become friends with him, but try not to get involved with compliments, one-on-one hangouts that could be seen as dates, flirting, confessing feelings, or anything that crosses that line. Try to focus on your BF - relationships take work so, if it seems boring, it's probably because you've gotten used to having him around and need to try new dates, convos, or flirting tactics to keep things feeling fresh! And remember - no flirting with/dating other people while you've got a BF...ESPECIALLY not with the BF's friends <3 
Lauren C.

by KatieBieber on 2/24/2012 10:40:57 PM

 
 

I'm sorry.

by MeikyuuButterfly on 2/24/2012 10:27:15 PM

 
 

There is no reason for that, if he is your bf and she is your bff that is betrayal. But some couples just arent meant to be together and yes it hurts but there are so many other guys out there. I would let them do their love thing and hope the best for them but let them know they hurt and betrayed your trust.

by luckykel on 2/24/2012 1:46:42 PM

 
 

Ok well me and my bf have been dating for 1 month already Laughing but the problem is that almost every single girl in the 7th grade likes him and that annoys him, ive already talked 2 him about it but i want to tell my "friends" to stop flirting on my bf bcuz one time my "friend" was all on my bf and of course i got jealous who wouldnt! But i didnt do anythin about it & i know my bf is faithful i feel it in my heart & he is really sweet and says he really wants to stay with me 4ever not like them other people who say dat but really dont, so my question is how should i tell my friends to quit flirting with my bf bcuz after i do im not gonna have the guts 2 talk to them anymore bcuz they were traitors and yeah my bf is really, really hot!!!!!

by Love&Peace123 on 2/23/2012 6:37:14 PM

 
 

I have had a crush on this boy for a few months. I am home schooled, and he goes to an arts school that is very hard to get into. I am trying to get in, but I am afraid he won't remember me. I don't want to say hi to him and mess up everything. Help!


Molly

by fashionrebel44 on 2/23/2012 5:42:30 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD
There's this guy Anthony. He's in two of my classes, but we only sit next to each other in the one class. Well anyways I really like him and I think he likes me to. For example, he looks at me a LOT, but if I look back at him he would say something like "Stop staring at me!" but he says it jokingly. He also lightly kicks my foot a lot and he doesn't move it if we accidentally touch. The only problem is that he's not allowed to have a girlfriend. How will I ever find out if he actually likes me or not?




Hey girl,

That totally sounds like you have a flirty friendship! It's best not to get your hopes up TOO much right now though, since he's not allowed to date. Try to get to know him better as friends for now, with flirting being part of your friendship but also focusing on other things (common interests, his fave sports/movies/music, his background, his fam and friends, etc.). Get to know him better as friends right now since he's not allowed to date - that way, when he's older and is allowed to have a GF, you'll already be close to him! <3
Lauren C.

by Bornagain on 2/23/2012 4:00:24 PM

 
 

Ugh! Thats horrible! Sorry that happened.....Frown

by DaNcInGQu33N9812 on 2/23/2012 1:22:01 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD
I need your help ever since i started school I never spoke to boys (very rarely) and now I'm older I feel like I already gave the impression that I'm boring and I don't talk I want to chat and have guy friends but I don't want it to seem awkward that I'm chatting all of a sudden you know like I'm crushing on any of them
any advice?
oh and I've been asked out by a couple of guys I said no and I don't talk to them anymore I feel like a DOPE magnet
what should I do? thank you soo much



Hey chica!

Chances are that if you start talking to somebody, the last thing they'll think about is you being "awkward" or having never seemed like the type to talk much before.  Considering these guys who have been asking you out, it seems like you may not even be giving out that vibe!  Just chat 'em up, babe!  There's really nothing to lose, and it's never too late.

Jordan S.

by paris_mi4 on 2/23/2012 1:07:51 PM

 
 

that is sooo rude. she is right find some other friends or bfs that got your back. sorry for that Frown

by amileofroses on 2/23/2012 12:42:36 PM

 
 

You should tell them that they are the worst friends ever and that you are going to find new friends who are better than them! Maybe you guys will forgive each other a while after that, but they BOTH needs to know how risky that was and that you almost LEFT them so they won't do it again. You DO needs to dump the guy tho. For someone who you thought was your BEST friend FOREVER, you could definetly, DEFINETLY take out 2 of those words... Best and Forever, because someone who did THAT is certainly not a Best or someone who I'd want to be with FOREVER, better yet, never.

by New_York_City on 2/23/2012 10:32:40 AM

 
 



MOMODMODMODMODMODMODMOD
I know this sounds dramatic, but I feel as though I'm never going to be able to have a solid relationship. I just had my first bf a few months ago, and I thought we really liked each other, but he dumped me out of the blue after 5 months of dating and is now with this other girl, who he's absolutely crazy over. We don't talk anymore. This guy I've had a thing with has told me over and over again that he wants to ask me out,but he still hasn't. We really had something going, but he's been drifting away from me. Am I boring or something? Why do guys so easily leave me behind for someone better?




Hey Girlie,

I know exactly how you feel, but I can guarantee you this has nothing to do with you! First relationships can be tough and sometimes one person has more feelings than the other one. Instead of doubting yourself, you should have faith and wait until the right guys comes around (and he will)! Don't give up, we all go through a couple of relationships and that's totally normal! But I promise you, you'll find someone that you really like and who likes you back!  
alicia m.

by bookworm31 on 2/23/2012 10:06:52 AM

 
 

.......this reminds me of when my crush kissed my older sister, Mike, u will DIE!!!!!!!! lol jk........kinda

by clem10 on 2/23/2012 6:59:07 AM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!
I recently moved to another state away from my 2
BFFS. My one BFF told me she needed this website because she was
"starting stuff" an I think she means per period. Anyway. They both are coming up in march for spring break for a week. And I think I'm bi. I wanna know if they are bi/lesbian or wanna make
Out or something but HOW do I ask that? It's weird to say "are you guys bi? Wanna
Make out?"
PLEASE BE VERY DESCRIPTIVE.
I wanna kiss a girl but none of my
Friends are bisexual or lesbians. And I just moved
So I have no friends here yet.
AND I WANT TO ASK DESCRETLY. pleas help.
and what tips for making out with a BFF?



Oh boy, this is a tricky one.

If you want to slip the hint discreetly, then I'd try watching a movie that features a girl-girl kissing moment, ones like Jennifer's Body, or watching a music video like Katy Perry's old I Kissed a Girl.  Then while you're watching it you can ask them if they've ever been curious about trying that. Jordan S.

by <3monkeys<3 on 2/23/2012 2:44:29 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!
SO I had a crush on this boy I'll call him Cedar. I'm over him now, because he's a freshmen, I hardly ever see him and he has a gf. My birthday party is coming up and I''m planning to go to a marimba concert featuring a lot of marimba bands, one of which he is in. But I'm worried about what he might think if I go wit all my friends, since lat time I went I liked him. Will he think I'm a creepy stalker who won't give up on him?? thanks




Hey Chica,

You're over him so why are you worried about what he might think? This is your party and if ya wanna see marimba bands then go for it! Besides, I doubt that he'd think you're a creepy stalker since you're with a lot of friends! Happy birthday, girl!!!

alicia m. alicia m.

by Bluejaye221 on 2/23/2012 1:03:22 AM

 
 

Woahh that's low. And total violation of girlcode!! How did you react when you saw them?!

by mangopie8240 on 2/22/2012 11:32:59 PM

 
 

I would dump the guy but actually hear my BFF out. I'd probably end up forgiving her, because boys shouldn't mess up a friendship with your BFF.

by brownichick on 2/22/2012 10:36:10 PM

 
 

Wow, I'm so sorry. That's awful Frown

Join my club, 'Orchestra Nerds and Band Geeks.' It's a loose and fun club where we talk about anything and everything- But especially music Smile Go to my profile to join!! svds

by svds on 2/22/2012 9:19:19 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD Ok so, me and my current boyfriend have been dating for only... about 3 weeks? I really like him and all, but I kinda wanna be single for a while but I really like this guy, but I kinda just want a date from dating? What shuld i do?

 

Hey emileee507, mhmm. Think about what it is you like about being single and try to accomplish that. If it's that you hang out with your girlfriends more, do than now. If it's that you and your boyfriend spend a little less time together, get some space from him. Because if you tell your bf you want a break to be single, you may not be able to get him back and it could hurt his feelings. Your relationship is really fresh and new girl, so jusst think about it. Hope this helps! Xoxo

Lynae P.

by emilee571 on 2/22/2012 8:09:52 PM

 
 

Hey chicas! Need some imediate advice? Come to my club, Dear KD! It's an advice club where you can get advice from several people to get different prespectives! I am giving out positions to anyone who is wanting them! Hope to see you there! <3

by smiles48 on 2/22/2012 6:55:54 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD On valentine's day I told my crush I liked him and he said he liked me back, too. We sent each other drawings saying I <3 you, and today I went on a fieldtrip with 3 other girls, because only 4 girls were chosen from each school to go to the convention. But while I was away, my crush said that he liked this other girl that he used to like. I'm really confused right now... Am I being played with? I feel betrayed and heartbrokened.

 

Hey cloudyday, maybe he likes both of you. Since you guys aren't in a relationship he probably thinks it's okay to like more than one girl. No worries, this doesn't mean his feelings for you are completley gone. Start spending more time around him and win his attention back. Hope this helps! Xoxo

Lynae P.

by cloudyday on 2/22/2012 6:45:41 PM

 
 

MODMODMOD ok so i was friends with this guy and i thought he liked me but then we kinda stopped talking for no reason....now we are in the same youth group and we occasionally talk but only when my other friends are there...he doesn't like them though and said he would rather hang out with me....he seems like he's flirting with me now again it seems like....but my friends keep telling me he's a bad guy and they really hate him. when i'm talking to them and i'm not with him i have mixed feelings like i might not like him anymore. but when i'm with him we have a really great time and i like him again....i don't know what to do! please help! i'll see him in an hour at youth group... thanks!!! xoxo Dramaqueen

 

Hey dramaqueen122, just give yourself time to make a desicion. Continue spending more time around him to see how you feel. If you like him that's fine and if you don't that's cool too. Just follow your heart. Hope this helps! Xoxo

Lynae P.

by dramaqueen122 on 2/22/2012 6:12:29 PM

 
 

1. Say your name 10 times.
2. Say your mom's name 5 times.
3. Say your crush's name 3 times.
4. Paste this to 4 other quizzes. If you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday, but if you read this and do not paste this, then you will have very bad luck! SEND THIS TO 5 QUIZZES IN 143 MINUTES. WHEN YOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERS ON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKS

by mybubblegum on 2/22/2012 5:46:39 PM

 
 

Okay, that may be one of the worst things I've ever heard... Girl, do you honestly want to know what to do? Let them have eachother and forget about them BOTH. Because if 2 rude, inconsiderate, sick, nasty, obnoxious people click idmediately? I think they were made for each other. Who wouldwant a friend or lover that could do such a thing? That's so bad... I'm sorry for you! Leave them behind and never look back. If either oth them cared about you, they would never ever do that to you. Time to find some new girls and noys, sister!!

by ktbug120 on 2/22/2012 5:33:50 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD! i like this guy but im pretty sure he doesnt know who i am. How can i get him 2 like me? & know who i am?

 

Hey tpowell11, check out this article for 10 great tips on how to get your crush to ask you out. I think it will help ya! http://www.girlslife.com/post/2011/09/27/Wish-your-crush-would-ask-you-out-already-Ten-ways-to-make-it-happen.aspx?cp=all 

Lynae P.

by tpowell11 on 2/22/2012 5:24:51 PM

 
 

*Gasp!* I have reasons upon reasons to break up with him, but I'll just list a few.

1. He's a dirty, rotten cheater!
2. He thinks your BFF is hotter than you. Your BF should love you and only you.

J-E-R-K! Nuff' said.

by katgrace11 on 2/22/2012 5:04:31 PM

 
 



Mod mod mod
I am dating this really sweet guy named Cody and we kiss and stuff after school. He is really funny and stuff but I REALLY need some flirty things to do. He puts his arm around my waist and stuff but I have no idea what to do!! HELP!!!




 Hold hands, write notes to each other, make a few inside joeks
Amanda P.

by cheekymonkey1 on 2/22/2012 4:44:39 PM

 
 

That's horibble! If that happened to me I'd get a new BFF. Tong

by Terra Rose♥ on 2/22/2012 4:19:29 PM

 
 



Mod mod mod
There's this guy and his sister told her friend who told me that he likes me but idon't like him and we r kinda friends what do I do?




Just ignore the fact that someone told you that and treat him like you normally do.  
Amanda P.

by sparklysharpie on 2/22/2012 3:36:20 PM

 
 

OMG!! breakup with him, and forget her!

by j4zm09 on 2/22/2012 2:10:34 PM

 
 

Whoa!
So harsh!:O
My bf wouldnt eva do tht,
I trust him lyk i can tell him anything
AT ALL!
Also my bff has a bf now so yea...
My bf never leaves me alone with a boy
caz hes soooo OVERPROTECTIVE lyk crazy!
Laughing :\ Tong :O Smile

by Susmita24 on 2/22/2012 2:01:13 PM

 
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