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ADVICE | TOUGH STUFF

35 Comments | Add Yours

Don't panic! What to do when you're freakin' out

 

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  • Why unplugging this weekend is the best thing you can do for your brain
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Just when everything seems to be groovy—kaboom!—life tosses you an icky curve ball. Maybe it’s a school crisis. Or your BFF is icing you. Or, yikes, someone told your BFF that your BF is kinda over you. But you don’t have to panic at the first hint of Big Trouble. Learn to think your way out of any surprise scenario—freakout-free!

 

Believe in the power of you

Take a deep breath, and tell yourself, “I’m smart and strong enough to handle this—no sweat!” Then don’t doubt yourself for a sec. Having faith in your ability to take care of biz clears your head so you can brainstorm a solution.

 

Face the prob

Don’t go all ostrich and stick your head in the sand, hoping everything will magically disappear. Be real about what has happened, and resolve to take action. That said, don’t strain your brain worrying about silly stuff that won’t amount to a hill o’ beans. So you turned up at the Spring Fling in the same dress as that evil cheerleader Cara. Who cares?

 

Get the 411

It’s super-important to gather the info you need to scope out the sitch. Rumor has it that your basketball coach is benching you for the next few games? Before you freak, you need to get the facts straight. Go to the coach and tell her what you heard. You might discover that it was just a bogus rumor. But if the coach tells you it’s true? Talk to her about why she’s sidelining you, and get pointers as to what you need to do to get back on the court.

  

Don’t stress or obsess

When you’re socked with a shocker, it’s natural to want to run the scenario over and over in your mind, trying to figure out exactly why things went down the way they did. Don’t torture yourself! Rotten stuff just happens sometimes.

Say your BF Jason drops you for another girl. Sure, it’s gonna bum you out, but talking about it with a bud can really help. Know that you can’t worry about it 24/7. It’s crucial to keep the rest of your life chugging along strong. Stay positive by focusing on your favorite activities—hanging with your girls, keeping up with Veronica Mars, relaxing in a yummy vanilla-scented bubble bath.

 

Increase the peace

Sometimes, the only way to deal with a sitch is to make peace with it. With certain things in life, you can’t affect the outcome. If your ’rents tell you the fam’s moving 3,000 miles away, then that’s what’s gonna happen. Rather than losing it, get excited about the future. Just think about all the new friends you’re gonna make and all the new things you’re gonna be able to see and do! It sounds corny but, sometimes, what looks like the end of the world actually turns out to be the best thing that could have happened to you.

                                          

Get your game on

Life will always be unpredictable. Don’t bother wishing your brains out that nothing bad will ever happen to you—instead, know that you can take control of most icky sitches. Are you calm? For sure. Have the facts? Indeed. Clear on what’s happening? Yep. Now, put your problem-solving plan into action. Then keep rockin’ and rollin’ at it until you feel better about what felt so bad. You are so up to the challenge!
 
 

Love this post? You’ll heart these, too!

» 10 signs your bestie kicks butt

» Spring clean your friendships

» Got a sticky BFF sitch? Dear Carol’s got all the answers!
 

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BY LISA MULCAHY ON 3/19/2012 12:00:00 AM

POSTED IN stress, stress busters, bust school stress

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Thank you guys SO MUCH for this article. The timing couldn't have been more perfect.

report

by doubleread56 on 3/19/2012 9:00:01 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD:
I am really insecure. I am about 10-20 lbs. overweight and I want to lose weight,but I also have ance and my hair never looks good,ect. I want to be confident,and I usually am. Typically I don't care what people think. But every now and then,I get in a funk and feel insecure. But this time it's different,I feel REALLY insecure. What should I do!?! P.S. Don't worry,I would even think about self harming in any way.



Hey girlie,

This unhappy feeling that you think is coming from all of these things is actually not really from them.  If you didn't get so down about it and you focused on what makes you happy and having all that you want then all of these things will likely slip away.

Take some time to redirect all of these negative feelings toward something that makes you happy.  Does going for a run help you let off steam? Reading? Drawing?



Jordan S.

report

by MadMaddie911 on 3/19/2012 8:54:30 PM

 
 

"Don’t go all ostrich and stick your head in the sand, hoping everything will magically disappear." I love that! That is my new life motto!

report

by Doodle600 on 3/19/2012 8:22:25 PM

 
 

Thanks! This is so helpful!

report

by nerdisthewurd26 on 3/19/2012 7:46:54 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD
two of my friends are with me in most of my classes and one of them i have been friends with since 1st grade and we're in 8th now so we're really close. the other girl ive been friends with since last year and all 3 of us are pretty good friends. the bad thing is me and my friend ive been friends with the longest are really getting annoyed with the other girl. she's always a downer and cant ever have fun. she acts like she's better than the rest of us and whines a lot. my friend and i really want to not be friends with her or at least not hangout with her but we dont know how to do it! since we have most classes together and i sit with the girl in science! plus, at lunch we have assigned seats so we have to sit with her. what can i do? thank you!



Hey girlie,

You can either have a talk with the girl about how sometimes the way she acts make you feel a bit uncomfortable, or you can attempt to gradually let her phase out.  Sometimes friends just generally drift apart, you can just let that happen as it will.
Jordan S.

report

by pinkguitar98 on 3/19/2012 5:55:51 PM

 
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