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Help! How do I get out of the friend-zone with my BGF?


 
I always seem to get friend-zoned because, unfortunately, I always fall for my BGF. I like my current BGF, and I've liked him before. The first time he liked someone and friend-zoned me. He doesn't like anyone now (as far as I'm aware). How can I get him to see me more as the girl he likes to tease and talk about bands with?
 
Are you sure that he wants a girlfriend right now? The most important thing is to take the time to ask him where his feelings lie. Don’t tell all right away, but test the waters and see whether he wants a girl in his life at that moment. Sometimes guys aren’t ready to have a girlfriend who they can really treat right, and they know that! So if that’s the case, find someone else who is ready to have a girlfriend, namely you.
 
But if he is interested in having a girl, the next thing to do is ask yourself whether you can really handle a relationship right now. Do you like the idea or fantasy of this boy more than the boy himself? Really question yourself: What do you want in a guy?  Does this guy have it? Most importantly, do you think that it’s worth it to jeopardize your great friendship for the try at something more? Think about being in a romantic situation with him rather than just a fun time playing games and talking about your interests. If that doesn’t seem like exactly what you want, then it isn’t a good idea to jump into the waters.
 
Finally, if you both seem ready for a new relationship, let him know how you feel. That way, you’ll know where you stand, so you won’t be pining over him while sitting there being his best gal pal. The worst that will happen is that he says no, just shrug it off and it will be way less awkward. As long as you don’t act differently, he won’t – and I promise you – you’ll feel way better and way less stressed with that question out of the way!
 
 

BY TESS MORAN ON 6/23/2012 10:00:00 AM

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I'm stuck in the same situation, he is my friend. And my friends ex. I really like him. I have a major crush on him, like the biggest one ever. He might like me, I read the one article about how to know if a guy likes you, and he does them, all but one since he doesn't stand tall (he is already very tall). I don't think I can talk to my friend because she isn't considerate of other's feelings. She says she doesn't know why he dated him or denys it or says she hates him. Help! What should I do?
Thx in advance

 

Hey! If you think he likes you try spending more time around him, send out some signals and see how he reacts. Ask if he's had any crushes since he and your friend broke up, or just ask if he could ever see you as more than a friend. There's nothing wrong with being direct, and honestly, it saves everyone a lot of time and energy trying to interpret every little hint. If he acts like it's weird, well, you can't help that, and then you'll know for sure how he feels. When I was younger I was told that honesty is always the best policy, but I don't think I really believed it until I grew up and went through some relationships. There is nothing inherently embarrassing about having feelings for someone, or expressing those feelings in a respectful way. It's all the peer pressure that tends to make crushes feel awkward and hard to deal with. So just make peace with the fact that you can't control him, or what he thinks, but you can control you, and if you believe that, it will give you all the confidence in the world to just go up and talk to any guy you want to, including your friend. Trust me Smile


Helen S.

by PeculiarGurl on 2/23/2013 1:52:36 AM

 
 


so there's this guy. I really him and you can tell he likes me. My bff told me to ask him out. Then he wants to meet my mom and we were thinking but joking that he wanted to ask my permission to date me. one problem my mom doesnt want me to date till im 16! HELP! btw if he asked me i would say yes




Hannah H.

by Luna8844 on 10/11/2012 1:57:36 PM

 
 

Well I have a BGF who I've known since we were both five and we r neighbors and hang out all the time, and I have a huge crush on him. Every time I like a different guy I always come back to liking him. He's admitted that he has wondered if he likes me and he thinks I'm cute, but he doesn't think we could date because we are "too good of friends" or we've "known each other too long". I wouldn't let anything mess up the fact that we r friends even if we dated and broke up! But the problem is I told this girl in my class that I liked the guy, and he told me on the bus today that she texted him and told him something about me. He wouldn't tell me what it is and I think she told him I like him! I really want to get out of the friend zone but I'm afraid he will be awkward around me after that. What should I do? Should I just give up? Should I talk to him about it? I don't want to make things awkward between us.


Hey girl,

It could mess up your friendship, but it could also be great! There's nothing wrong with staying friends and seeing what happens, so keep hanging out with him for a while and see if he changes his mind. If not, at least you have a great friend!

Meghan D.

by Sunny79 on 9/7/2012 11:50:56 PM

 
 



Mod mod MOD
I liked this guy at the end of last year (he is 13 like me)and then also liked an older boy during the summer(15). 15 asked me out and I said no bc I have a lot on my mind bc my aunt was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. And he isn't the best person. He lost his virginity when he was 13 and we disagreed alot before he even tried to ask me out. Now I like 13 again but I lost touch with him throughout the summer and we r only in some classes together. Idk if he still likes me bc he did last year and then I started liking 15 so now Idk if he still likes meFrown I don't know what to do. He is also one of my good friends(13)




Hey girlie,

Try talking to him more! You lost touch throughout the summer, so you have the perfect convo-starter - ask him how his summer went, did he have a part time job or go on any fun vacations, is he excited for school, what classes is he in, etc. You could even apologize for not being around too much since you had a lot on your plate. As you get to talk to him more, you'll get a better idea of how he feels <3 
Lauren C.

by Farmer16 on 8/23/2012 5:45:24 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD
theres this guy thats a year older than me (13) i really like him but i dont want to embarass myself if i act all flirty around him and he doesnt lke me back. i want him to know i like him without having to take the risk of him not liking me back. HELP!!!!!!
- <3 is a gift

 

Hey chica! Sometimes you have to take a risk to find out if someone likes you! But saying that, don't over do it. You  can drop hints here and there by inviting him to do things on the weekends or after school, casually compliment him, and talk to him about some of his interests. After doing things like that for a little while see how he responds! If he starts making the plans, complimenting you too and asking you about your interests likelihood is he's into you too! xoxo

Carly S.

by <3 is a gift on 8/22/2012 6:59:57 AM

 
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