GirlsLife.com - 'Fess Up: Are you too picky when it comes to guys?

'Fess Up: Are you too picky when it comes to guys?

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My relationships never last long. I’ve never been dumped—I always dump my BFs. Two weeks is the longest I’ve had a boyfriend. I’m too picky and expect a guy to be perfect. If he ignores me when he’s hanging with his friends, I usually break up with him. Is that bad? Should I give a guy more chances?

Dear Picky,

Not every relationship is supposed to go the distance. But you’re asking for trouble if you expect perfection or want a guy to pay attention to you every second. Give him breathing room. A boyfriend should not act as if you’re invisible, but it’s healthy for him to hang with his friends and for you to spend time with yours. You could also tell him how you feel rather than dumping him. Is it possible you’re the one who needs some space? Consider taking a vacation from the whole boyfriend thing, even a short one, while you figure out what you’re looking for. Going with someone can be fun, but not when you’re changing BFs as often as you’re changing socks.

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BY CAROL WESTON ON 7/4/2012 12:00:00 AM

Hey kwr3000, no worries chica. You're not the first to have difficulty flirting and attracting guys. Once you get comfortable being around them and talking with them, they'll be chasing you. Click the links below for articles on overcoming shyness and flirting. It's really easy!

http://www.girlslife.com/post/2012/07/10/What-to-say-when-he-looks-your-way.aspx

http://www.girlslife.com/post/2012/06/01/Hook-a-hottie-How-to-play-it-cool.aspx

http://www.girlslife.com/post/2012/01/03/How-to-ask-out-a-guy-without-sounding-desperate.aspx

http://www.girlslife.com/post/2012/02/24/Tease-tease-tease.aspx

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i'm slightly boy crazy. the problem? i've asked boys that i really liked out a few times before but every time i got rejected! one time i slow danced with one of my guy friends and that's the closest i ever came to "going out" with someone. i know that if a boy is really worth my time, he'll like me for who i am but i tend to be really weird and awkward and whenever i become close with a crush and i try to "flirt" i end up totally blowing any chance I ever had with them with my awkwardness. any advice? Lynae P.

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This year, one of my BFFs started dating a guy who I've known since I was a baby and our families are great friends. I've been hanging with this guy for my whole life. However, last year he started acting like he didnt know who I was, and I actually heard him publicly deny that he even knew my name or anything else about me! We still talk, but we arent as good of friends. This guy treats my girl like crud! He whispers to his friends about her emotional side, he ignores her in public, he lies to her, and when they were in a fight, he relied on ME to tell her that he was sorry! Even though they are both my friends, they are both not ready for a relationship if they need a messenger to talk to each other. I've tried to tell my friend this, but she gets mad at my for getting involved and despite how this guy has hurt my feelings before, says that I dont know anything about this situation. I know that this isnt nessessarily my bizz, but its my shoulder she cries on!

Hey babe, it's great that you're looking out for your pal, but sometimes you just gotta let your girlies make their own mistakes. If you've told her your opinion, then that's the best you can do. Just try to be supportive and be patient. She'll come around.

Carrie R.

by cmfox99 on 7/16/2012 4:53:37 PM

Im just the same way. The guy has to be the way io like him or it's just not going to work out. I think it's okay to be this way right now while were 'young'. Keep it real though.

by TrueGirl14 on 7/14/2012 8:24:23 PM

This is very good that you have high expectations for yourself with guys. However, everyone including guys make mistakes. Depending on the mistake though, I would dump them. If they are mentally, emotionally, or physically abused, this is one thing. But if guys sometimes forget to call when he says he will, or maybe gives a "flirty smile" to the waitress at the restaurant, in each relationship, it's going to be hard to hold on to someone. If you feel there being distant for a few days try asking them what's up, and see what they have to say. They may need some breathing room, for reasons that probably have nothing to do with you. Maybe he got in a fight with his parents, feels pressured with school, any number of reasons. Try and see the whole picture!! Once you get this down( it's hard, but you will) you will see which guys are worth keeping, and which ones you can move on from. Oh, and as for hs guy friends, when they're hangin out, ask your bffs to come along!

by sammydog90Fl on 7/13/2012 10:18:12 PM

by kwr3000 on 7/11/2012 6:02:58 PM

Are you serious. No bodys perfect.You should at least give them a chance. If u keep that up word will get out and no guy will want to date you.

by hungergamesfan on 7/8/2012 9:09:37 PM

Becca G.

is modding

Lauren R.

is modding

'Fess Up: Are you too picky when it comes to guys?

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