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GUYS | DATING 101 | DUDES DECODED

Help! I'm secretly dating a guy behind my mom's back

 
 
My mom said I could start dating at age 16. I'm 15. This really nice guy asked me out and I said yes. I couldn't help myself. What am I going to tell my mom?!

Hey girl! You’re going to tell your mom just what you told me. As long as you haven’t been sneakin’ around behind her back, I’m sure she’ll understand you being excited about a nice guy asking you out (and she’ll be thrilled to hear he’s a nice dude, trust me). After you come clean about agreeing to go out with him, talk to your mom about your options. Could you and your BF go out with a group of friends? Could your guy come over and watch a movie while your parents hang in another room? Your mom might not want you to go off on your own with a guy, so provide her with a couple options that involve you two getting to know each other better in a group. 

Here’s the tough part: If your mom still says absolutely no guys for another year, you’re gonna have to let this guy know. If you sneak behind your mom’s back for a couple dates and she finds out, you’ll lose her trust. A few dates aren’t worth that. Instead, let the guy know you’re not allowed to date until next year. He may not be willing to wait (his loss!), but you wouldn’t want to date a guy like that, anyway!
 
 

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BY KATE GERAGHTY ON 8/12/2012 12:00:00 AM

POSTED IN , , , , , , ,

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28 Comments | Add Yours
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MOD MOD MOD MOD!!
Can you be too close to your mom? I mean, I'm extremely close to both of my parents, but one of the most influential preson in a kid's life is the same-sex parent and that is WAAAY true with my mom. I was diagnosed with cancer about 5 weeks ago and I can't go to school. I was in the hospital for a week and my mom was there with me the entire time. I stay at home every day. I have to go to the hospital about every 3 weeks for treatment. Every time I've had an appointment or any treatment my mom comes. We started spending nearly every moment together. I've always been close together and we hung out just us a lot, but now it's grown even more. I'm afraid that I'm getting so close, that it's emotionally unhealthy. When she goes to work I miss her. Like right now I feel really lonely. When my dad and bro are home I'm better but I still feel alone if she's not here. Is this healthy?




That's what moms are for! They are there to support you and be with you every step of the way. It's normal to be attached to your mom and in your situation, it is beyond normal. Continue to stay close to your mom, there is nothing wrong with that! 
mailyse f.

by snickie on 10/26/2012 3:23:04 PM

 
 

Hey chica,
15 isn't that far away from 16, so it won't be totally awful when u chat with ur mom. Just tell her the truth. If she still is set on u dating when ur 16, obey her. U dont wanna disobey her again. That can teach her NOT to trust u. Hope that helpsSmile

by expressyourself on 10/23/2012 11:18:17 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD.
HELP! My boyfriend came over last night and we started kissing and things got intense before we did anything we shouldn't have i told him to leave. Well when i went to bed last night i was seeing his face everywhere and I'd wake up every 10 minues thinking of him. What's wrong with me?! Like my Dad said goodmorning to me and I saw my bf's face instead of my own fathers!! What's going on?!

 

Hey girl! Seems like you've got a bad case of puppy love! You must really like this guy, don't worry, eventually you won't be seeing his face EVERYWHERE. xoxo 


Kate G.

by ashie39 on 8/28/2012 9:17:26 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
HELP!!! i really like a 16 year old and hes so cute! he can dirve he even drove home the other day! & he likes me too but the problem is that i'm only 13 Frown what do i do?

 

Hey girl! Try finding a dude closer to your age- it can seem cool to date a guy 3 years older, but he might be looking for things you aren't in a relationship.  If you really like him, check with your parents to see how THEY feel about you guys dating- they might want to get to know him better, first! xoxo 


Kate G.

by Jbug77 on 8/21/2012 2:39:54 PM

 
 

Hey ladyinlike, I think it's best to be honest here. Let him know you don't date younger guys. I was in this same situation girly. There was this cute guy interested in me but he was like 5 years younger! I broke it to him nicely that I felt I was too old for him. Although he tried to get me to change my mind at first, he understood where I came from and everything was cool. So gently tell him you like boys your own age but suggest still remaining friends. Hope this helps! Xoxo



MODMODMODMOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I'm 15 and I've been talking to a guy I recently found out was 12. I have since then started to be wierded out talking to him but he's messaging me a lot and I dojnt want to start ignoring him but I don't want to be talking to him constantly. How do I get him off my back???HELP!!!!! Lynae P.

by ladyinlike on 8/18/2012 10:56:28 AM

 
 

MODMODMODMODMOD!!!!!
I NEED MAJOR HELP! ok, so i met this kid in math class that i really liked. and we texted and stuff all the time during the summer and it was great but then we went to this camp together and he was super embarassing and kept asking me out for lunch and i said no and so i stopped texting him and he eventually stopped talking to me and such and i felt kind of bad. i texted him occationally after the camp but he didn't reply but a few minutes ago he called and we talked like nothing ever happened. should i give it another go, or ditch him? thanks!

Hey girl,

If you want to give your friendship another try, that's up to you, but make sure you're honest with him about wanting to be only friends so that he doesn't get hurt again!

Meghan D.

by HannahJL on 8/17/2012 11:51:01 PM

 
 

Yeah, I like this person's advice. Tell your mom whatever you do. My dating line is sixteen for both my parents and me. ;)

by Gabriella123 on 8/16/2012 11:06:26 AM

 
 



mod mod mod mod mod mod
I love kissing my boyfriend but he has really bad breath a lot which turns me off (obviously) I really wanna kiss him but its so bad! I dont want to tell him and be mean! what do i do!?

 

Hey girlie! A little bit before you kiss him, pop a mint yourself and offer him one . People usually take mints when they are offered, so your boyfriend's breath will be minty fresh! xoxo 


Kate G.

by gleek97 on 8/16/2012 2:55:42 AM

 
 

Boy Problems ASAP
Ever need someone 2 talk 2 but, your to afraid 2 ask your parents. It's OK just talk to me and I'll help you out ASAP!Please feel free 2 ask questions.Oh and remember the more people the BETTER!Ages 10-17

by AarynJ on 8/15/2012 10:11:39 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD
it gets really anoyying when my friend keeps telling
me what to do and whatever i tell them to stop they wont.




Hey girl--

Bossy friends can be annoying. Firmly tell her that you have your own opinion and preferences. If she won't quit it, spend more time with other friends. 




good luck!  
simone s.

by RubyVo on 8/14/2012 4:41:16 PM

 
 



mod mod mod
my mom says i can have a facebook when im 13 which is in like a few months. but i am kinda wondering if its better not to have one with all the horrible cyberbullying and creepy stalkers on the internet is it a good choice to have one?




Hey babe, if you don't wanna get a Facebook, that's totally your call. There are pros and cons to having one, of course. If you do decide to get one, you can stay safe by not putting up a lot of personal info, being selective about the pics you put up, not putting up statuses about your vacays, and not allowing apps to access your info. And just remember that you can get one any time, so if you don't feel like you need one now, then just wait on it for a while.  
Carrie R.

by mcw3400 on 8/14/2012 11:38:36 AM

 
 

Dont push it. It may fun for a while but if she finds out she may not believe you when its time for more important things. But I know many of us have to do what you are doing because our parents dont want us involved with a guy to young. Maybe she will not mind as much as you think, and just let her know at some point you are going to be dating no matter what.

by fashionqn on 8/13/2012 5:48:16 PM

 
 

I almost did this... I regretted not dating him for awhile but now I'm glad I didn't. XD

by unicornninja on 8/13/2012 2:58:39 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
My best friend and I where suppposed to have a sleepover today and she canceled on me .I am really upset what should i do .

 

Hey girl! Sometimes things come up, so if you're bummed that your friend ditched you, call up another friend and see if she wants to hang out tonight.  Then, call your BFF tomorrow and ask if you guys can reschedule.  xoxo 


Kate G.

by OneDirection1843 on 8/13/2012 11:47:54 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
I'm 11 and I'm heading back to school next week. and my teeth are a little yellow... Are there any natural ways to whiten your teeth? and my dad doesn't like tooth paste that has fluoride because he says it's bad for you. also, what are some other things I can do before school and tips?
Thanks!

 

Hey girl! Try wetting your toothbrush and dipping it in baking soda and then brushing normally.  That should whiten your teeth without any nasty chemicals! xoxo 


Kate G.

by Gabbyw123 on 8/13/2012 9:33:13 AM

 
 



Mod Mod Mod
My mom says since I'm going to high school I can start dating but my dad won't even let me have guys in my phone(even though I do).And whenever I go out he's there, like when our school had a home football game he came when he was only suppose to pick me up(which was an hour before time) and stayed he just sat there and watched me It was annoying.Plus we don't even get along like a dad and daughter should.All I want to do is enjoy my 4 years in high school and the people around but I never can because of my dad.Any suggestions?

 

Hey girl! Sounds like you need to sit down with your dad and have a convo about what each of you want to change when you head into high school. Your mom seems to be more relaxed about things, so it might be a good idea to have her there to be a go between.  Tell him what you would like, he can explain what he wants, and see if you can come up with something in the middle.  xoxo  


Kate G.

by Jazzyrock2213 on 8/13/2012 6:16:41 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!
So there's this guy that I'm pretty much best friends with. We met in 7th grade and on the 3rd day of school he asked me out. I lied and told him my parents wouldn't let me date. Now were going to be freshman and I like him. I can talk about anything with him and he always compliments me on how pretty I am and how nice my smile is. It seems like he likes me but whenever I ask he always says someone else. Also I feel like he flirts with other girls too. I don't know what to do! Please help!!
ThanksSmile

 

Hey girlie! Since he took a risk and you turned him down, maybe he doesn't want to put himself out there again.  Why don't you take a chance and ask HIM out?  He might appreciate you making the first move! xoxo 


Kate G.

by mns_10_14 on 8/13/2012 2:09:38 AM

 
 

Great advice!

by j4zm09 on 8/12/2012 9:35:53 PM

 
 

I always tell my mom everything, and because of that she trust me enough to let me make my own decisions.... So just tell your mom the truth and hopefully she will realize that by letting her know and not sneaking around, that you are responsible enough to date.

by LilyLookALike on 8/12/2012 12:41:02 PM

 
 



MODMODMOD: So i am kinda getting over the boy from camp but now I kinda like a new guy. Only prob? He's my friends ex BF. I feel horrible when i talk to him sometimes b/c he flirts and i kinda flirt back. I really feel a spark between me and him, but i dont want to loose my bestie. Idk what to do! Help?




Hey girlie,

I think the best thing to do here is talk to your bestie. Has it been a while since they've dated? How long did they date? Were they in love? Is she still hung up on him? Try to get a sense of how much he means to her and if she would be mad if you got closer to him. You're right, you don't wanna lose your bestie over some guy! But it would be silly to miss out on getting to know him just because you're scared of talking about it with her. Be honest - tell her you think you like him and you'd love to see where that goes, but you won't do anything if it'll make her upset because you really value her as a friend. Talk it out and see how things go before you make your next move <3
Lauren C.

by TeamAlice33 on 8/12/2012 12:32:26 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
Hey, I have a situation. Okay so last night my town had a celebration and they lit off fireworks, during that my boyfriend and I had our first kiss , afterwords he told me that we could do that now instead of hug, but I don't want to kiss him all the time, I think of it as a really special thing. If he tries to kiss me the next time I see him and I don't want to, what should I say or do? P.S. I really don't want to hurt his feelings with this. Thanks for your help!!!




Hey girlie,

Just be honest with him! He's your BF after all, so you should feel like it's ok to tell him how you're feeling. If he tries to kiss you again, chat one-on-one and tell him exactly what you told me - that your kiss was great and it was such a perfect way to celebrate during the fireworks, but you would feel more comfy taking things a little slower. Tell him you like him so much and you don't want him to feel insulted by this, but just ask him if he would mind if you kissed sometimes (not all the time) and still hugged/held hands/did the stuff you did before. That way, you compromise and you're not doing anything that makes you feel uncomfy Smile
Lauren C.

by Em&Emmalee on 8/12/2012 11:57:56 AM

 
 

It's not called "dating", if you have to sneak around and keep it a secret. You'll have plenty of chances to date when your parents feel your old enough. Don't be in a rush to grow up because before you know it your off paying your own bills. No boy is worth potentially losing your parents trust.

by i<3princeroyce5/11/89 on 8/12/2012 11:24:07 AM

 
 

i did that to but we broke up before i told my parents and now they found out from one of my friend's (if you call her that)mom and im in sooo much trouble its not funny but my dads more disappointed then anything which makes it even worst

by SoftballGirl19 on 8/12/2012 10:43:45 AM

 
 

Hola chicas! Join the club Guys R Us for great guy advice! We discuss crushes, boyfriends and celebs. Get the best boy advice from girls just like you! <3

by cali princess on 8/12/2012 7:25:18 AM

 
 

Talking it out with your mom will make everything go smoother even if your embarrassed or scared!

by Acutiebookworm on 8/12/2012 4:02:41 AM

 
 



"As long as you haven’t been sneakin’ around behind her back," Um, hello! The title of this article is "I'm secretly dating a guy behind my mom's back".
*MOD MOD MOD*
Hello there! My birthday was a few days ago, and I got an iPod Touch which I am so happy about, that is what I wanted! But anyways, I really wanted to get Instagram, because photography and stuff like that interests me. I was wondering what the legal age is to have an Instagram? I looked on the website, it didn't say. And I am 11, I would have my photos private, and only follow people I know, and only LET people I know follow me. Thank you in advance. By the way, I am mature for my age, so I wouldn't look around for innapropriate photos.
XOXO,
WinnieGirlie




Hey girlie,

From Instagram's Terms of Use, you must be 13 years old or older to use their site/app <3 

http://instagram.com/about/legal/terms/
Lauren C.

by WinnieGirlie on 8/12/2012 1:15:11 AM

 
 

Hey girlies! Check out my new club Style Spy. We deal with everything beauty. Including makeup, hair styles, and fashion (of course!) All positions open.

by ACaseOfMistakenIdentity on 8/12/2012 12:22:23 AM

 
 

hey girls check out my profile and comment if u like

by auslly123 on 8/12/2012 12:08:15 AM

 
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