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How to survive a shark attack

We’re not sure if you’ve heard, but this week is the week for the world’s most fascinating predators. It’s Discovery Channel’s Shark Week, and just like the rest of the world, we are glued to the screen (even if we’re not 100-percent sure why…). While we’ve never seen a real-life shark outside of the local aquarium, we’re pretty sure some of the folks we deal with everyday are just as toothy and vicious as their water-bound namesakes. Trust us, this guide will come in handy--even if ya stick to the sand from now on. 



Fishy sitch-y: The school mean girl is movin’ in for the kill.

Survival strategy

You’re not sure what ya did—maybe you outscored her on a math quiz or befriended her crush or, we don’t know, just breathed too loudly in her presence. But you do know this: The queen bee is comin’ for ya…and you have no idea what to do. Instead of quakin’ in your cardi, summon up a dose of confidence and stifle your inner scaredy cat. Treat this meanie on the block like you treat every other acquaintance: politely. When she doesn’t get a rise out of you, she’ll get bored and move on.


Fishy sitch-y: Your too-cool-for-school crush is suddenly interested

Survival strategy

Play it cool, cutie, but don’t make things too easy for him. We’re not sayin’ you’ve gotta play hard to get or shut him down, but do be a little wary of guys who’ve never given ya the time of day before. Trust us, starting your relationship as friends will give ya solid foundation for the future…and it’ll help ya sniff out his motives—just in case.


Fishy sitch-y: Your besty is suddenly green with envy…and getting majorly nasty

Survival strategy

Don’t let her get away with bad behavior, especially when you so don’t deserve it. Accusations aren’t the way to go. Instead, sit down for a one-on-one chat with your chica and tell it to her straight. Explain how her actions make you feel, and then ask her why she’s acting this way. Be sure to let her have her say.


Fishy sitch-y: You’re the only gal in your homeroom with a hot tub, and once the temps drop, the populars want an invite

Survival strategy

Yeah, it’s neat to score an invite to the in crowd. But do you want friends who use you for the things you have? Yeah, we didn’t think so. It’s fine to agree to a get-together once or twice, but insist on hanging out outside of the hot tub (or whatever perk they want ya to peddle), too. They don’t want you to join them for movie nights? Fine. But when they ask for some splash time, say, “Sorry, but I’m busy that night.”


What “shark attacks” have got you reelin’? How did you handle them?


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BY BRITTANY TAYLOR ON 8/16/2012 1:20:00 PM

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