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32 Comments | Add Yours

8 non-flirty tips to snag a guy friend


 

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There is a fine line between a BFF and a BF, and tightrope walking on that line is the Best Guy Friend (BGF). It is tricky to even get a guy friend without him falling into the boyfriend zone or becoming totally weirded out by girl world. Yet, we all seem to want one for those days when our girl friends are out chasing boys and our boyfriends just need a guy’s night out. So here are some tips on how to snag a guy friend:
 

BFF and BGFs aren’t that different

Start the same way you would try to get a BFF, be friendly. Say “hi” to him in the halls, laugh at his jokes, and smile when you make eye contact.

 

You’re one cool girl

Show him how cool you are by talking and laughing with the friends you already have. If the two of you have any mutual friends, stick with them. When he sees how everybody else already really likes you, he will want to be your friend too!

 

And you’re fun, too!  

He wants to have fun—so be just that. Crack some funny jokes that will make him realize what a blast you can be.

 

The more, the merrier

Start inviting him to group gatherings. Get a bunch of girls and guys to go do something fun like watching a local baseball game. It will give you a chance to hang out, while the group will prevent it from being an awkward date.

 

Friendship is key

Use the word “friend” when referring to him. Introduce him as “my friend ______.” This will subtly let him know that you aren’t looking for a BF/GF relationship.

 

What does he like?

Talk to him about things he is interested in. Remember that you wanted a BGF, not a BFF, so don’t talk about the same things you would with your girl friends. Stay away from talking about his GF, your BF, what to wear to school tomorrow, and how you look. Start talking about the football team’s next game or how to win the next level on his favorite video game.

 

Be a good friend

Sometimes guys want a friend (who is a girl) because they are tend to be more empathetic and understanding. So listen to him when he is talking. He is your friend, so let him vent, talk about his emotions, and keep his secrets.

 

Relax

Be yourself and all that entails. When hanging out, don’t worry about how many calories you just consumed during that pizza eating contest, just groan about how much your stomach hurts from eating so much. If you burp, it’s not a big deal so just laugh it off.
 
 

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BY HANNAH HICKLEN ON 9/15/2012 12:00:00 AM

POSTED IN bff, guys, GL's best guy advice, guy friend Q & A, make friends fast

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32 Comments | Add Yours
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Mod.
So yesterday my BGF and I small each other at an arts fair.
When ever we are at school or at a small event w/ each other we are really social.
But when we are at big events or see each others parents w/ them. We get really shy and nervous around each other. We act super socially awkward.
Why do we do this? How can we talk in public more too?




Hey girl, just try and talk about whatever! Relax and have fun with your friend! 
lauren r.

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by nateruess77 on 4/21/2013 8:19:25 AM

 
 

maybe try to make friends with someone a little older or younger than you.i'm in 7th grade and my bgf is in 8th grade.we where kind of put together by drama class but it turned out to be a great match!it's nice cuz older and younger kids aren't part of the social drama surrounding your grade.also its kinda impossible to fall into the romance hole with him cuz they are a bit older or younger and they want a gf that is their age

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by ashbabe567765 on 11/7/2012 1:52:16 AM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD
There's this guy that I think is really really cute, but I haven't talked to him, but all my friend say he really nice. I'm really nervous to talk to him and I don't know when a good time is because I don't ever see him and when I do he's with all of his guy friends. One of my best guy friends said that he was a good guy and I'm trying to get him to help me give him an excuse to talk to him but I always get so nervous. PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME!! I don't know what to do!

Hey girl,

You could talk to him at lunch or after school, and you could always start a casual conversation about school, or sports or TV. It's intimidating, but once you get to know him as friends it will be easy to talk! Check out our Ice Breakers page for tons more tips on talking to guys Smile http://www.girlslife.com/category/ice-breakers.aspx

Meghan D.

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by Taffy18 on 10/26/2012 11:24:52 PM

 
 

MODMODMODMOD
I had a dream about my BGF. It didn't have anything to do with love or anything. Do I like him? I have mixed feelings about that. My friends say they can see me and him together but I can't! Help!

Hey girl,

Plenty of people can appear in dreams as just friends--there are a lot more dreams than just romantic ones! If you're not sure how you feel about him, there's no need to do anything yet, so just keep hanging out with him as friends and see where things go with your relationship. If you do decide you like him, you could always ask him to dance next time your school has a dance!

Meghan D.

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by katgirly on 10/26/2012 11:22:50 PM

 
 

I'm pretty shy but I got to know my BGF 7 months ago by chatting with him throughout Skype. It actually helps a lot, because you're talking to them in private and you can share a lot of feelings (depending on how the guy is).

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by AdeleMakesUsShine on 10/20/2012 7:07:38 AM

 
 

Tonight at midnight ur true love will realize they love u. Something good will happen to you at 1-4pm. Tomorrow it could be anywhere. Get ready for one big shock! Post this to 10 comments or you'll never find out if ur true love loves u

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by jazzyrae on 10/17/2012 10:52:52 PM

 
 

MOD! MOD! MOD! MOD! MOD! MOD! I need this answered like......ASAP!!
So I had a dream or something about my crush.....and I suddenly feel a bigger spark between us...We don't really talk or anything. He is just my crush, Anyways, We met in 1st grade cause we were partners, and I have just liked him ever since. But does me feeling a bigger spark if you know what I mean, Mean anything?? BTW We are both in 6th grade......I cant talk to my parents about it, I'm too shy, But please help me! And also no saying things like "Your too young to be worrying about them, Focus on school" My grades are pretty good compared to last year actually so that isn't gonna be a problem, PLUS I study a lot after school and before bed.......I just need help! I have loved him for as long as I can remember!! I get all woozy around him! I've got it bad....Please help me!

 

Hey girl,

Your dream might have made you realize how strong your feelings for him are, which may have made you feel a bigger spark. If you've known him for a while, why not try getting to know him as friends and talking to him outside of class? If he gets to know you more, me might start feeling that spark too.

Meghan D.

report

by Rusher43245 on 10/13/2012 10:05:07 PM

 
 

I have a few guy friends but i wouldn't call them BGF

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by heather99 on 10/13/2012 9:43:05 AM

 
 

I only have like 2 guy friends. Guys at my school are always hard to make friends with because they are awkward and try to make a fool out of you. They also swear a lot and are sexual. Why are guys like this and how can I find a guy friend that's actually cool?

report

by YouCanCallMeCat on 10/8/2012 5:08:26 PM

 
 

i really want guy friends but im just too shy:/

report

by freddymylove on 10/2/2012 6:51:37 PM

 
 



Hi! Ok well there is this one boy who asked me out to homecoming like 2 weeks ago. The truth is I really didn't want to go with him so I just said that if I do go I'm pretty sure I will be going with friends (because i was still undecided yet) He was like ok fine! Everyday after that he has been trying to talk to me on facebook and sends me messages EVERYDAY saying "Hi" or "Hey what's up?" It gets really annoying. I dont find him attractive at all and i just want to be friends. Friday he was starring at me all class! Sometimes it's really hard for me to focus while doing my monolouge. I dont know how it all started, but i think one i got paired up with him and i was just really nice or something. People are starting to notice it and they are starting to get annoyed with him too. The worst part is HE'S A JUNIOR AND I'M A FRESHMAN!!!! please help!!!

 

Hey Real12, you gotta say something to him girl. Be polite but let him know you are not interested. Tell him he's messaging you too much and you would like it if you guys didn't talk too much. You could even say you have a boyfriend to get him off your back. Hope this helps! Xoxo


Lynae P.

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by Rea12 on 9/30/2012 11:31:53 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD
Okay so my BGF who I've only known for a few weeks (but we are really good friends already) is really obsessed with me. He is always texting me, putting my name in his instagram bio, telling me he loves me(like a friend, but he does it a LOT) and I am starting to feel like he might ask me out soon. The problem is I don't really like him that way at all, and I really just want to get to know him better before we even think about dating. How can I let him know I'm not interested in dating him before he tries to ask me out?

 

Hey lovecaroline, try giving him little hints in the things you say. You can try something like "You are such a good friend" or "I'm so happy we're friends." Even bringing up relationships and discussing how you're not ready for one will help. Hope this works! Xoxo 


Lynae P.

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by lovecaroline on 9/27/2012 10:02:58 PM

 
 

So I have this guy friend that my other friends think that he likes me and i kinda do to but my other friend likes him. Every time I flirt with him my friend looks mad how do i explain we're just really good friends?

Hey girl,

If you're not interested in him, your friend will understand that it's not your fault if he likes you! Tell your friend that your relationship with her is more important than any guy, but neither of you can control how he feels. She'll understand!

Meghan D.

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by Lyric307 on 9/21/2012 10:33:10 PM

 
 

Ok so there's this guy in my 7th period and I like him alot but the only problem is that he barely knows me besides my face (unless of course, he likes me too, which in that case, he would probably know my name too). Yesterday, I caught him looking at me when I was trying to look at him and we both ended up smiling at eachother. We kinda did this a few more times througout class and I went home in an extremely cheery mood. I really like him and I don't know how to just go up to him and say hi because I feel like it'll be really awkward that I just randomly started a conversation and there's no way we can pass notes or anything cuz our class is orchestra. How can I start to become friends with him (and possibly lead to a relationship)? And by the way, he's like a shy guy and that's my type... (he's new to our school, he just joined about 1 week ago).

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by leena2474 on 9/18/2012 9:05:35 PM

 
 

Ok so there's this guy in my 7th period and I like him alot but the only problem is that he barely knows me besides my face (unless of course, he likes me too, which in that case, he would probably know my name too). Yesterday, I caught him looking at me when I was trying to look at him and we both ended up smiling at eachother. We kinda did this a few more times througout class and I went home in an extremely cheery mood. I really like him and I don't know how to just go up to him and say hi because I feel like it'll be really awkward that I just randomly started a conversation and there's no way we can pass notes or anything cuz our class is orchestra. How can I start to become friends with him (and possibly lead to a relationship)? And by the way, he's like a shy guy and that's my type... (he's new to our school, he just joined about 1 week ago).

report

by leena2474 on 9/18/2012 9:03:09 PM

 
 


MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD
Ok so I think this kid in school likes me. He is always hugging me and staring at me. o.O He always says to me how I am nice and funny. Then today a lot of kids when up to me and were like: I think he likes you. I just ignored them but he told me how he asked out a girl today and she said "rejected" him. So I said: "Aw I'm sorry". Then he said: "I know you like me though right? You would have totally said yes." I laughed and said not that way. (I was under pressure and couldn't say anything better!) He looked all sad and I felt really bad. I don't know if i like him yet but I am afraid he will ask me out! I won't know what to say! Do you think he "like likes" me or just as a friend? What should I say if he asks me out?





Hannah H.

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by BabyDahl13 on 9/18/2012 4:10:24 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
There was this really nice guy that i met at this summer college program. He was a really good friend of mine and i cant stop thinking about him. He helped me at the last dance by dancing with me when my "date" ditched me. I think he liked me as more than i friend and i think i like him. The only way i could get ahould of his would to go through a chain of friends to get his number. Is it worth it? I really think i like him and i cant stop thinking about him. Should i try to get his number?




Hey girl, you know the expression "YOLO"? I say go for it. It'll always be a question and a what-if if you just let him go, but it could be a great story if you pursue it. And a story is always better than safe regret.

xoxo 
Alyssa B.

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by luvmonkey1313 on 9/17/2012 6:37:00 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD!!!
ok so this really nice (and cute) guy moved into my neighborhood recently. he's in 7th and I'm in 8th. we've become really close friends, but i want to be more than that. i really like him and i think he likes me too but im not sure. he always sits with me on the bus, even when he is bringing a friend over, smiles and waves at me in the hallways, and always is trying to make me laugh. i asked my BGF to find out if he liked me bcuz they are in the same grade and are friends. He told me that he wouldnt really answer and was being shy about it, so i asked one of my BFFS who is also in his grade and his friend, to find out. she hasnt done it yet but she is going to. until then, i dont know how to know if he likes me back. and if he does should i tell him i like him too and see if he asks me out? HELP!

 

 Hey girl, see if this link helps you out: http://www.girlslife.com/post/2009/09/16/advice-love-crush-dating.aspx  if he does like you, go ahead and tell him you like him back! Or, you could always be the first to say it and see for yourself.

Lauren I.

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by punky99 on 9/17/2012 7:58:41 AM

 
 

Heeeeya my super cute puppies!
If you want long hair or cute hair acessories (both?) Join EVERYTHING hair! I can tell ya what you need to know! Advice on hair? Join advice queen YayaYuiki! I have officer positions for my club left so if you wanna have one ya gotta grab it! You can tell me what it is and I'll do it!
~Ari

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by YayaYuiki on 9/16/2012 10:40:39 PM

 
 

MOD
My best friend well my BGF is gay. I am supper supportive with that decision. We have been friends for about a year or two but it seems like forever. Anyways on the 4th of july we played spin the bottle. it landed on me and it was his turn so we kissed. After that we are still the same. and act the same as we do. Yesterday we were hanging out and he said to me  I like you a lot. And then he kissed me. he drove me home and it was really awkward but we still had fun. then today he texted me and said have you thought about it? my problem is that he is gay or did he turn bisexual. What should I say or do when he picks me up to go to school on Monday?

Hey girl,

It sounds like he is confused, which is completely normal! He might not be sure what gender he's into, but it sounds like he's definitely into you, which is all you need to worry about Smile So if you like him, it sounds like you get along really well, and there's nothing wrong with dating him even while he's still figuring things out, as long as he knows he always has your support!

Meghan D.

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by kas8897 on 9/15/2012 11:30:56 PM

 
 

mod mod mod!!!! MOD!
found out my best guy friend likes me, hes in 8th grade and im in 7th. I sorta like him a little to. But i also like a guy whose in my grade, i like him alot. For my best guy friend its easy for me to be around him, and hes very funny and social (i dont like him because hes 'cute') But on the other hand, since im VERY VERY shy, around my other crush i can hardly say anything, i get butterflies, and for some reason i get this feeling in my chest whenever i look at him, hes also very shy, but hes also considerate, nice, silly, an AMAZING soccer player, and a straight A student. my friend says she's herd him talking about me to his best friend(aka: "lily looks pretty in blue" and "lily has a really beautiful voice") and i catch him looking at me alot. i like them both but idk which one to choose, who should i choose!? my best guy friend or the cute and sweet straight A soccer player?! (p.s. i luv playing soccer, i play it with my crush and my BGF)

Hey girl,

If neither of them has asked you out, you don't have to choose! Just keep hanging out with both of them as friends for now until you figure out your feelings!

Meghan D.

report

by lilja on 9/15/2012 10:11:26 PM

 
 

Really, just treat them like you'd treat your BFFs (minus the girly stuff). Guys are just people.

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by Acutiebookworm on 9/15/2012 9:06:24 PM

 
 

Your website is being overrun by ads!!!!!! i don't know how many times i've accidently clicked on an ad, because theyre everyyywhere.

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by girlygirl22werock on 9/15/2012 7:23:46 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!
I just started 9th grade (at a new school obviously), and well, I've had a crush on this great guy since 7th grade. He decided to participate in a special program at a different school, so I don't ever see him, even though his bus drops him off just a little later at my school. Anyway, after a Speech/Debate meeting the other day, I saw him, and even though I couldn't talk to him at the time, I waved. His face brightened up, and he waved back. Before school let out last year (and the year before), he was super nice to me and would lightheartedly tease me, and just stuff like that. He's nice to other girls, but it's not for any special reason, it's just that he's a nice guy. However, he was especially nice to me, especially after he and his girlfriend broke up. My question is, do you think he could like me?
Also, since we won't see each other much (if any) anymore should I just let him go? I really don't want to, but if so, how can I get over him? Thanks!

 

Hey girlie, I think there's a definite chance that he might like you. But since it would be hard to have a relationship without ever seeing each other, it might be best to not pursue it. 


Lauren T.

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by lpolk on 9/15/2012 4:40:47 PM

 
 



MOD!MOD!MOD!MOD! so i just started 6 grade and every day after 8 period i see my crush i have liked him this whole yearhe always says hi first and we have told each other how we feel but i think our friends our ruining our relasinship im trying to become close with him what should i do?

 

Hey girlie, keep talking to him. And talk to your friends to prevent whatever interference is going on. You can build your relationship by walking with him after class or talking to him anytime you get a chance. 


Lauren T.

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by jadarocks2401 on 9/15/2012 3:38:28 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
I am in high school now. When there is a test, I get really nervous and stressed. Then I end up not doing very well on the test and get more stressed. I am a good student, but I need help when it comes to taking a test, mostly standardized tests! Thanks!

 

Hey girlie, do everything you can to prepare ahead of time. Start studying as soon as you know about the test so that you can walk in confident that you know that material. Just take deep breaths before the test to calm yourself down and you'll ace it! 


Lauren T.

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by girlfunhrf on 9/15/2012 3:18:15 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
Hi! Where can I get good bras from? I'm 13 and almost a 32 A.

 

Hey girlie, since you're young and still growing, you probably don't want your bras to be too much of an investment. Try inexpensive department stores like Kohl's or JC Penney's. Target has a good bra selection too. 


Lauren T.

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by ballerina55 on 9/15/2012 2:24:57 PM

 
 

Haha these are kinda like step by step instructions to keep guys in the friendzone... Tong

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by cremecake on 9/15/2012 1:31:05 PM

 
 



*MOD*MOD*MOD*MOD*
So there's this boy...He liked me in sixth grade and I sorta liked him too but not enough to tell anyone. Within the first week of seventh grade I was head over heals in love with this boy. We had every class together and I was in love. Now here's eighth grade and we only have band together. I text him all the time and we are super close. He'll sometimes say he loves me and call me baby too. My friend asked him if he likes me and he said no. Could it be because it's my best friend and she would tell me or does he really not like me. Everyone thinks that we would be a good couple.

 

Hey girlie, it's hard to tell. Try talking to him about it. Tell him that you really love being good friends with him, but you're not sure what to think when he tells you he loves you and calls you baby. I know it's hard, but you'll be happier knowing how he feels even if he doesn't like you as more than a friend.


Lauren T.

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by alison99 on 9/15/2012 12:24:22 PM

 
 

This is kind of funny because I hang out with more guys than girls. It's not that hard to talk about mean teachers, football, and food, which is really all I talk about with most of my guy friends.

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by jo_crox on 9/15/2012 12:19:53 PM

 
 

Hmmm these sound like tips to get a BF. I mean, start talking to him? hang out with his friends, show him how fun you are? I don't know about you but that kinda sounds like how-to-get-a-boy-friend tips. Well thanks for the BF tips!

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by HannahJL on 9/15/2012 8:36:46 AM

 
 

I have a guy friend.....Having a dude friend rocks! U can talk about how u love star war or play basketball with out being made fun of!!!


Join the Smartical partical club!!! Best geek club there is!!!!

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by Prim on 9/15/2012 8:21:01 AM

 
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