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ADVICE | DEAR CAROL

I'm addicted to videogames! Help me hit the "off" button

 

 

I’m a computer game/videogame/TV junkie. Every time I go on the computer, I become a zombie. I shut out my parents and friends, and they get really angry when they have to pull me off the computer screen to talk. I want to save up for an Xbox Kinect, but I know my parents will find me glued to the screen 24/7. I really want to get over this bad habit.

 

Dear Game Zombie,

Since you know you’re too glued to the tube, forget your Xbox. It’s easier to resist purchasing it than to resist turning it on each day. When friends are over, keep the computer and TV off—at least for the first hour or two. Do homework or bake pumpkin muffins or take a walk or play a board game. You can hardly blame a friend for being offended if you ask her over and then shut her out. Can you tell yourself you won’t turn on TV or the computer until a particular hour? Can you reward yourself for trying to break what is indeed a bad habit? When your hand goes for the “on” button, can you turn around and do something else instead—at least sometimes? Answer: Yes, you can! (P.S. You’re not alone. Lots of girls—and adults—spend too much time staring at screens.)
 
 

SERIOUS STUFF? For serious issues, don’t wait. Visit our HELP! page now.


For more on Carol Weston, visit her website: carolweston.com or like her Facebook page.

 

To order Girltalk: All the Stuff Your Sister Never Told You, click here.
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BY CAROL WESTON ON 10/12/2012 3:52:00 PM

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28 Comments | Add Yours
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Im diabetic (type 1 not type 2) and I really wish i had a flat stomach! im not like fat but i feel like i am, people say that insulin makes you not have a flat stomach but idk and i wanna know is there any way to get there? i have to take my insulin but my pump is annoying and when i wear my bikini you can see it..so not a confidence boost. my parents make fun of me for stuff like that too! and for not having boobs...ugh! not my fault! any advice from diabetic chicas? or really anyone?

by blueeyeddreamer on 3/21/2013 12:48:34 AM

 
 

HOPELESS SISTER
I really miss my sister her ex-husband and her are getting back together and my mom said they shouldn't and the got into a fight so I can't see her but her ex drops off my nephew sometimes so I know it's not that bad but I haven't seen her in such a long time and I really miss her and want to see her but she deleted her fb and got a new number and the only way I here from her is if I text the ex and I'm not comfortable doing that but a week ago he texted my mom saying my sis really missis me but she hasn't called me or tried to contact me in any way I don't know what to do but I really miss her.

by Themissannie24 on 1/3/2013 1:36:51 AM

 
 

FRIEND OR FOE
I am in a really tight situation you see..... My BFF knows I really like this guy and have been into him for years and she is dating him!! She says her so-called-friends dare her to ask him out but I don't believe it one bit. I mean really, it has 'accidently' happened about 10 times... in ONE year. She has been my friend for 2-3 years now. I really wanna stay her friend, I have told her before I don't like her doing that but she pretends that she is innocent. I give presents to my crush, I gave him a card, a 10$ hat so far this year.. I talk to even my mom about it but she doesn't know anything what I mean. My friend is the nicest person ever but.. What should I do?!

by Dash1432 on 12/26/2012 4:59:23 PM

 
 



Mod mod mod
what is this with my friend recently she's getting pissed off of me for no reason earlier today she she said I was a weird dancer and she knows it's because she's a lead dancer and then it's really annoying when she blames me for everything but when our friends do it she just laughs. Our teachers have been noticing that we argue a lot. not really bad words or insults but a lot of sarcasm and stuff. She blames me for everything even our friends noticr. What gives?

 

Hey babe-

There might be a deeper problem here. Could something be up at home? Is she going through something that she can't really talk about, so instead takes it out with anger? Have you tried talking to her? If not, pull her aside and make sure it's just you to and then ask her what's up. Let her know that the way she's been acting toward you lately is not cool and you want to know why. Don't corner her and make her feel bad, just let her know what you're feeling and that whatever she's going through, you're there to help. xoxo 


alexis g.

by LizHeartsLondon on 12/13/2012 5:10:13 AM

 
 

I read on this website that sports like gymnastics, which I do competitively, can affect when you get your period. But will it also affect when my boobs start growing and other things like that? I want to know when to be worried.

by mustache_zebra on 12/5/2012 11:37:52 PM

 
 

I am really happy. My friend is going to let me help her. HORRAY!!!!!!!!!!!

by appleduck101 on 11/25/2012 12:05:09 AM

 
 

ok so I can't even look at my crush without blushing how can I even talk to him

by ariel6412 on 11/24/2012 2:27:58 PM

 
 

how do i submit something to 'dear carol' for advice?

by jerseygirl98 on 11/21/2012 2:37:47 PM

 
 



modmodmodmod
how can i get my hair to grow longer?

 

Hey girlie, a good way to get it to grow longer is to get your hair trimmed. Trimming your hair will remove all of the dead ends to keep your hair healthy and speed up growth.


Lauren T.

by pandasrock292 on 11/18/2012 7:59:34 PM

 
 

Hey need help??!!!Smile Join my club!!!!! Ask us anything and many people will give u answers!!! Join now we need more members!!!!! Join GirlsNeedHelpSmile

by aleale<3paramore277 on 11/14/2012 6:06:46 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
I have this friend who is in a competitive sport. She amazing at it. She's also super athletic and good at like, everything. The problem is, she can be really conceited about it. She always acts like she's the best in gym class, she once texted me to complain about coming second in a meet, and one time she told me that she was better at baskball than I was! I play basketball and she doesn't. She also acts like she's always right. One time I miss pronounced shot put, and she still taunts me about it!! I'm tired of feeling like such a loser and I'm really tired of being reminded of it. Sometimes she even pokes fun at my size. I don't wanna lose her as a friend. Please send some advice!!Frown

 

Hey girlie, talk to her about it. Tell her that it bothers you when she makes fun of you and tells you that she's better than you. If she knows that it's a problem, she might be more motivated to stop it. 


Lauren T.

by kenbon on 11/11/2012 8:00:53 PM

 
 



MODMODMOD hwy this is weird but last week I kissed a girl on the cheek in front of my crush. It was tiny and accidental. Then I was talking with my other friend and I almost kissed her! it was like we were magnets, and this never happened with any boy! Am I gay? My step dad is against being gay but my mom and dad arn't I'm afraid I won't be accepted! help!

 

Hey girlie, a kiss on the cheek doesn't make you gay. If you're crushing on a boy, then you probably aren't attracted to other girls.


Lauren T.

by LOLGirl109 on 11/4/2012 8:48:14 PM

 
 

Hey all! I'm really good at giving advice. so if you can trust me, let me know what's been buggin ya lately and maybe I can help ya out! Ask about anything from guys to family and everything you can possibly think of to ask!
Just vist my advice queen page. I'm on every single day. So guess what! NO WAITING!!! Looking forward to helping ya out!

by Becca<3's you on 10/29/2012 8:58:06 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
I have this friend who is really getting on our groups nerves. She is always yelling and shouting out in class. We feel like she's using her loud voice as a way to show dominance. Within our group we think everyone should be equal. She's also extremely self centered, for example we will be working on a group project and she will ask to bring the project home and tell us that she will do it and them only do it so she gets points and we get low grades on that assignment. We've tried dropping hints. Now what should we do?
Thanks in advance Smile

 

I think if she tries to take the project home just so you guys get low points I would confront her. That's not fair at all. Maybe if you confront her in a situation like that, things will slowly get better. You just need to make her aware of her behavior and how it makes you guys feel. As long as she doesn't feel like she's being attacked you guys could really get through to her. xoxo kerra


Kerra S.

by gracezoom144 on 10/23/2012 9:52:30 PM

 
 





MOD MOD MOD
Please answer A.S.A.P.
I am super worried about my mother .She used to be very anti smoking . Then when I was 9 , I found out that she was smoking around my aunt who visits around once a year( she is a heavy smoker and smokes around 3 packs of ciggarettes in a day)The last year I saw my mom smoke around 3 times a week with her best friend who recently moved close to us . In the past week , she has been smoking about 5 times a day .I have cried sevreal times about it and I am at such a loss .Please give me advice on where to go from here . Thank you so much

 

Hey auslly123, maybe put a presentation or powerpoint together that explains the damaging effects of smoking. This will show her how concerned you are about her health and will give her lots of reasons to quit. It may also be helpful to look at easy ways to quit smoking. Hope this helps! Xoxo


Lynae P.

by auslly123 on 10/21/2012 9:44:07 PM

 
 

help i have a crush on this boy but im only 12 so i cant have a boyfriend yet but i want to be his friend. He is really shy so he doesnt really talk alot. i sit next to him in language arts so we get to talk when the teacher says to turn and talk. How can i start talking to him?

Hey girl,

There's nothing wrong with being friends with guys! Talking in class when you're supposed to be discussing the assignment is a great way to break the ice, so you could try continuing that conversation outside of class by asking how his weekend was, how he's liking the class, etc. to get to know him a little better. It will be less awkward once you know each other more!

Meghan D.

by pandasrock292 on 10/19/2012 7:21:27 PM

 
 

I have the book "All the stuff your sister never told you"!!!!

by gracezoom144 on 10/17/2012 6:59:35 PM

 
 



mod mod mod mod! mod mod mod mooooooooood!
ok so i have a couple of friends in my group and theres this one girl who is really negative and not many people want to be near her. She invited herself to our lunch table last year and she has driven one of my friends away and i miss her soo much! what do i do?




Hey girl, try getting your old friend back by inviting her personally to sit with you. If this new girl makes negative remarks, ask her politely to stop if it's really bothering you and others or try to change the subject and ignore her. Chances are the girl just wants a reaction. If she doesn't get it, she'll stop because it's no longer an effective strategy to.

xoxo
Alyssa B.

by pandasrock292 on 10/15/2012 8:36:21 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
I don't really like to think negatively, but a girl was telling me how ugly she is and how the only think she likes about herself is her eyes then I said, "Not really, nobody's ugly some people just have ugly personalities" then she rolled her eyes and said "Easy for you too say, your-" then I asked her "I'm what?" she said "Never mind" what did she mean by that?

 

Hey hinatagal, she probably thought you were pretty. She was mostly thinking it's easy for you to not think you're ugly, because you're not. No worries she didn't mean anything harsh. Hope this helps! Xoxo


Lynae P.

by hinatagal on 10/14/2012 10:42:35 PM

 
 

the only thing i'm glued to is my computer... and maybe this peice of paper stuch on my finger! HAHAHA

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!!!! Join my club: Operation: YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! Our mission is to post anonymous notes in public places for other people to find. The point is that WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL!!! In my club, we will have daily quotes that you can put on post- its to uplift girls. We also give advice on how you can make your day better, and everyone else’s day better! So please join our uplifting club so we can tell everyone that we are beautiful the way we are!

by heather99 on 10/13/2012 9:44:44 AM

 
 

I am very addicted... I love to play Minecraft for hours on end or watch Youtube Minecraft videos... I want an Xbox so i can play more Minecraft.... IT IS SO FUN I DON'T WANT TO STOP!!!

by gecos03 on 10/12/2012 10:36:30 PM

 
 

I'm sometimes on GL too much;)

by myfatsquirrel on 10/12/2012 10:19:30 PM

 
 

I have guy friends like that but most of my friends arent addicted. One friend has admitted she does play too much but it doesnt seem like it to me. I have even heard of people dying from playing non stop 24 hour games. That is crazy. Find a bf, they will help with you managing your time, but they can be addicting too. <3

by fashionqn on 10/12/2012 9:57:49 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!
I need any advice you can give me! Ok so I'm really really bad at presenting to the class and I have this big long paper to read in front of my english class on Monday. Every time I get to the front of the room to read a paper I panic, my voice starts shaking and I start to feel really trapped and like I can't get the words out. I guess you can say I have stage fright. Anyway, I've tried thinking possitively and often times haven't even felt very nervous before giving a presentation but something happends as soon as I get to the front of the room and I just shut down and can't do it...something about everybodys eyes on me, I just can't handle it very well.
I know you won't be able to solve this problem for me but if you have any tricks or ideas on how I could help myself stay a little calmer on Monday..I would REALLY appreciate it!! (: Thanks!

Hey girl,

It is totally normal to be nervous, a lot of people are nervous before presentations! Try practicing reading your paper in front of people you're comfortable with, like your family or a friend. Then, when you're reading to the class, imagine you're reading it only to that person again, and you'll be more comfortable. No one at your school is judging you, and I'm sure they'll all be interested in what you have to say. Good luck on the presentation, you'll be great Smile

Meghan D.

by maggie183 on 10/12/2012 6:51:03 PM

 
 

mod mod mod
i have a habit of picking on my cuticles! UGH! I use to pick on my nails but I quit 4 yrs ago! My mom grounded me for the whole summer in 3rd grade and i learned my lesson! Although it grows pretty slow...1 month to be long medium length...meh..anywho..um...yeah..I don't wanna get grounded again to learn my lesson, i tried the reward system..Tsk tsk tsk, i forget so easily in a day! And people call me a walking encyclopedia..meh....I wanna stop, my friend does try and stop me, she had a habit too before, now her cuticle area is all darker than her skin area..ew..whenever I heal my cuts which are on 7/10 fingers, I pick on it without knowing a clue like daydreaming! UGH! PLZ GL HELP! GIVE TIPS FOR THAT HABIT AND TO GET LONGER NAILS FASTER AND STRONGER! I do have a nail strengthener/hardener thingy and i put it on as my base coat always, ALLLWAYS! PLZ HELP ME BREAK THIS HABIT! I HAD IT SINCE 2nd grade! It's due to stress or boredom or even no felling at all!

Hey girl,

Wanting to get rid of your habit is a great first step! If you're picking your cuticles without even realizing it, this may be a manifestation of something bigger, like stress or anxiety that manifests itself in nervous energy, so I would speak with a parent or guidance counselor to try to sort out why you're drawn to picking your cuticles. They can also give you tips on how to stop for good and give you tips on other ways to relieve stress, like exercise. The best thing to do for now is talk to your parents or another trusted adult, and they'll help you from there.

Meghan D.

by Susmita24 on 10/12/2012 5:40:03 PM

 
 

I used to be addicted to video games too. I got out of the habit by quitting. I was on a social gaming website and it got out of hand. All I did was quit. Now I look back and see how dumb it was to even spend my time on that game. Smile

by YouCanCallMeCat on 10/12/2012 5:13:32 PM

 
 

My old best friend used to be the same way, except with her phone. She was always on it and it was annoying because she would ask to come over, then ignore me. Bu if she was hanging out with her other friends, she would always tell me "Got to go". I saw her phone in her pocket and Facebook would be open.It was like I wasn't good enough or something and it hurt. So girls, when you're hanging out with your friends stop texting. (Same rule applies if and when you're driving.)

by scamp24 on 10/12/2012 5:03:21 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD
Well, I like dogs but my mom is allergic, so I decided to be a dog walker. (I have a little experience walking an old neighbor's dog before I moved)How do I get the word out that I am a dog walker? I tried putting it in our community newsletter and handing out business cards in the park, but nothing has happened yet. Thanks!

 

 Hey girl, wow you already sound super business savvy! Handing out cards and getting it in the community newsletter was a great idea! Make sure your fam spreads the news as well. All that's left to do is wait. You're doing great. I hope you get a client soon!

Lauren I.

by genieinabottle on 10/12/2012 4:32:56 PM

 
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