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GUYS | ASK BILL & DAVE

What to do when people hate on your love

 
 
People don’t like that my BF is black and I’m not. I don’t care what they think, but we’ve been threatened. I’m afraid for our safety if we don’t break up.

 

Bill: It’s amazing we’re dealing with this issue in the 21st century. Of course, you shouldn’t break up if you care about each other. Tell the proper authorities about the threats and, hopefully, this sort of prejudice can be put into a time capsule.
 
Dave: Idiotic threats take on even greater significance when made because of race. That’s why special laws address what are known as “hate crimes.” Have an adult intervene before one occurs.

BY BILL AND DAVE ON 10/29/2012 12:00:00 PM

POSTED IN , , , , ,

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23 Comments | Add Yours
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You know, it's great that your with someone who makes ya happy. All you do is smile and say, you know, we are very happy together, there's no reason to hate him. It's ONLY his skin tone. Then if he's by you walk away confidently. Smile

by LivieLoo on 12/28/2012 2:19:05 PM

 
 

One of my best adult friends happens to be white and her fiance is black. I can't wait for the wedding!!!

by appleduck101 on 11/23/2012 11:19:23 PM

 
 

I really admire the fact that you still love him even after threats and obviously teasing. I can't even express how amazing that is. Just because someone isnt the same color as the other person doesn't mean they shouldnt love eachother. Such a great example, thank you so much for this story.

by WashingtonGirlie13 on 11/5/2012 7:05:15 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
So I have known this one guy for 5 years now, and throughout those 5 years he has always told me how he hates me, and finds me annoying, and he says other mean stuff to me. This year he is in 2 of my classes, and he is always talking to me! He never stops talking to me, and told me that he likes talking to me because I'm the only one that will listen to him. He doesn't deny or say that hes sorry for saying mean things to me, and sometimes still does..What is with this guy?

 

Hey! do you know if he has many friends or is socially awkward? sometimes people who have a tough time in social situations react by lashing out at other people because negative attention is still attention. He may also have a crush on you. 


Helen S.

by proarchergal42 on 11/3/2012 4:38:29 PM

 
 

A lot of the prejudice that still goes on today is based on insecurities.Maybe this is too big to talk about on this site, but some people feel that dating people from another race means that you think that someone of the same race is not good enough for you.Maybe it's the hair or the stereotypical behavior the one race likes to place on the other,but they all play into this. As much as we would want to see prejudice go away America's obsession with race is so deep in our history that 50,60 years of reform and change won't get rid of centuries worth of racial divide.

by realchk on 10/30/2012 12:22:25 PM

 
 

I'm amazed people still care about this. My boyfriend is black and I'm white and I've never been threatened. However, we are teased sometimes with our friends about his race but it's just in a funny way. it doesn't bother him at all. we both laugh about it and he'll make jokes about it too. We've been together 9 months. Love has nothing to do with race or what you look like. If you two are happy together please don't let anyone ruin it for you guys! best of luck in your relationship!!(:

by girlyleo8526 on 10/29/2012 11:16:22 PM

 
 

Race shouldn't matter, but I know the feeling. My mom is black and my dad is white. I live in a cookie cutter suburb with little diversity, so it's hard hearing racial jokes, and stuff like that. It's hard when race is seen as an issue, but you have to stay strong.

by litmarvel on 10/29/2012 9:58:56 PM

 
 

Stay strong girl! <3

by DancePartyChick200 on 10/29/2012 8:27:39 PM

 
 



Mod mod mod!!
I need a hairstyle for my birthday, one that will be really pretty and unique, I have naturally straight hair that goes just past my shoulders, and I have layers. I would like at least some of my hair down, pleas help me I can't think of anything!! I need your help ASAP so I can practice! Thank you soooooooooo much!!!!!!!




Hey girl, I'd try channel a celeb whose hair you really like! Grab a pic and take it to your hairdresser. Maybe a bob would be cute? Think Selena Gomez or Emma Stone's hair if you're looking for inspiration or for a more dramatic change, get bangs! Perfect way to change things up without greatly altering length.

xoxo
Alyssa B.

by Honeycakes on 10/29/2012 7:51:58 PM

 
 

I dated a black guy for about 1 year. During that time people constantly made fun of me. Even though it was hard and I thought of breaking up with him just so I didn't have to deal with it anymore, I had fun! and I don't regret staying with him. If you like him stay strong, and keep going!

by Francissca on 10/29/2012 7:50:48 PM

 
 

Wow. Are people still acting like that?

by sprinklz28 on 10/29/2012 7:45:47 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
Ok so I recently introduced my friends to a guy that they know I liked and i told them i did. Anyways it went great but he doesn't go to our school and im the only one that will see him ever again but he exchanged numbers with all of us at the end of the night and i told mt friends that i didn't realy want them texting him because I really like him and i dont know if it was wrong for me to ask them this but I think i have the right to... i mean doesn't it go against some girl code somewhere? I mean if i didn't like him things would be different and i wouldn't care... but i like him alot. please help! Because they don't see why they shouldn't text him...... Frown




Hey girl, I don't know if I do either, honestly. When you say that to your friends, you are a) telling them you see them as a threat to you and don't trust them and b) preventing them from helping you score him (they could talk you up or help you get a better feel of what he thinks of you). I'd relax and let them talk to him. Let them be your friends: they know you like him and could just help. Trust them enough to let them and not assume they'll harm.

xoxo
Alyssa B.

by ell08 on 10/29/2012 7:16:44 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
My best friend think a told another girl something bad about you and i didn't help shes been mad at me for a while




Hey girl, try to explain the sitch to her if she'll hear it out. If she knows your side, she may be more forgiving.

xoxo 
Alyssa B.

by AarynJ on 10/29/2012 6:38:46 PM

 
 

I don't see why people make different races such a big deal...
Good luck!

by Acutiebookworm on 10/29/2012 6:08:27 PM

 
 

my mom is black and my dad is white. i am obvi mixed and i don,t care! my mom and dad didn't get teased by anyone back then and nobody should get teased now!!!


your welcome!

by peace6767 on 10/29/2012 5:30:56 PM

 
 

i use to date a black guy and im white and like the same thing happened to me!

by bking62 on 10/29/2012 5:30:44 PM

 
 

That is so messed up! They should just let them be in love > I would say what do you care ? and if ya care ya jealous

by TSfan#1 on 10/29/2012 4:57:23 PM

 
 

Wow, I can, but yet I can't believe people threaten you guys. Tell the authorities soon.

by Gabriella123 on 10/29/2012 4:33:07 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD
I am 90% sure my crush likes me. I can't figure out to make him tell me he likes me. It is so obvious to me, why won't he tell me he likes me?




Hey girl, it may be because he's afraid you'll reject him! Hint you like him too so he has nothing to be afraid of when he tells you assuming that 90 percent chance is right.

xoxo 
Alyssa B.

by Pugglegirl1008 on 10/29/2012 3:58:03 PM

 
 

I had a crush on black guy once, and I'm white! So what? No one should care about the color of skin.

by YouCanCallMeCat on 10/29/2012 3:53:26 PM

 
 



Mod mod mod!
Two questions (if you only have time to answer one the second one is the most important, but it would be helpful if you answered both):
1. Okay so my crush broke up with his GF last week and he wasn't sad at all. He flirted with me a lot while he had a GF and flirts with me a lot now. Today in math we moved seats and now he sits with me! How do I get my flirt on with him in Math? (We sit across from each other)
2. There's this boy that I can tell is really trying to show me he likes me. I might CONSIDER dating him, if he wasn't so gross. He is REALLY inappropriate and I'm kind of scared of being alone with him, in fear that he would sexually harass me. How do I get him to not like me and stay away from me without being mean?
Please help me!!!!!!! Thanks <3




Hey girl, 1) why not see if you guys can pair up on a HW assignment or study for a quiz together? Be careful though: this guy is fresh out of a relationship. Give him some time for him to recover before you go marching in. 2) I'd say ignore his signals and just be polite around him. If he invites you somewhere, decline kindly. I'd stick to interacting with him when you're in a group (so not one-on-one) if you do feel threatened by him. Strength in numbers.

xoxo 
Alyssa B.

by turnonthemusic1 on 10/29/2012 3:41:18 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!
Something like this happend to me... or well not really, but it will. Okay so I'm in 7th grade and a guy I like is a Freshmen in high school, he is goth... I am considered a "prep" to other people, so I would think it wouldn't work out between us because my friends would be really freaked out, not talk to me, and talk about me behind my back thinking there was someone wrong with me... I am thinking on waiting until i'm a freshmen to tell him I like him, and maybe he will like me back but idk.... please help what should I do! We are really good friends, but Im scared of what my friends woud do!




Hey girl, don't worry about your friends here. Think about what you want. This would ultimately be your relationship, not theirs. Don't sweat reputation: you don't have to give up being a prep for this guy, and you shouldn't have to. I say hint you like him and see what happens. There may just be sparks!

xoxo 
Alyssa B.

by Dragonfly214 on 10/29/2012 3:39:11 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD
What is the best eyeshadow color for brown eyes thanks. Smile




Hey girl, I like to light colors on my eyes personally. Stick to warm tones but golds, pearls, whites and browns look lovely, along with purple.

xoxo 
Alyssa B.

by lmpsport on 10/29/2012 2:11:04 PM

 
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