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GUYS | ASK BILL & DAVE

Help! I'm dating my bestie's crush behind her back


 
My BFF doesn’t know her crush and I are dating. I feel really bad because the last time we crushed on the same guy, she let me go out with him! Am I a bad person?
 
Dave: Uh, you’re developing a pattern. If nothing else, you get high marks for consistency. Are you sure you truly like these guys, or do you just go for ’em because your friend does (or vice versa)? Do some self-evaluation because you’re on a path that could only lead to trouble. There’s a contingency to the BFF thing regarding repeatedly dating your friend’s crush—it voids the whole deal. Have you heard of the TEE (Total Enemies Eternally) program? You will.
 

Bill: Did you date him after she started crushing on him? Seems like it, or you wouldn’t be writing! That’s probably a penalty in the field of crushing. Yellow flag, 15 yards. A friendship can’t end on a penalty, though, so you’d better come clean to your BFF.

BY BILL AND DAVE ON 12/3/2012 11:00:00 AM

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Hey like my really close friend at school, she's like my closest friend and i kinda look alike anyway so this guy at school was kinda flirting with me and i got super nervous so i would walk away.This happened for like a week then he stopped. the next week he started flirting with her and they really hit it off. Now they are always walking together and i feel like the third wheel also i think i kinda like this guy but now i think my friend does too because they are always together 24/7. should i be jealous?? or...

by CrushGirl2000 on 12/11/2012 3:21:57 PM

 
 


Ur not a bad person yet. If this becomes a habit,vthat could change who you are(and I bet the real you is kind, smart, and not some sort of "scarlet women!") you just need to get your priorities straight. Friends that are forever, or boys who could be gone in a second?  Hannah H.

by puddinface7 on 12/4/2012 3:08:49 PM

 
 


MOD MOD MOD so there are times when my dad and I have a really big fight. As much as I know he's mad at me, he has a really bad temper! I try telling him that he needs to control himself, but he doesn't even though he said he would. The last fight he was throwing chairs around the room and my mom was yelling at him too. I'm really scared this might lead to something more serious, like abusing or something.


 


Hey chica! You definitely need to sit down and have a talk with both of your rents, letting them know how concerned you are. If it's easier to express your feelings, maybe you could even write them a letter. That way, you'll get out all that you want to say. Be honest and let them know how worried you are about what his temper could develop to. Maybe, you guys can work out a plan for when he's upset- something that'll calm him down or make him laugh.


xxx


Becca G.

by PuppyCT on 12/4/2012 12:06:06 AM

 
 

MODMODMODMOD
Okay so there is this girl, lets call her A. A always talks about everyone behind their back to everyone else. People say that A talks about me the most. A is best friends with B and so am I. B is really nice and I don’t know why she is friends with A. A is sort of like Regina George from “Mean Girls”. I don’t know if you have ever seen that movie but Regina is really mean to people behind their backs and everyone knows it, but everyone still loves her. How do I tell A to stop talking about people behind their backs?
Thanks!!

Hey girl,

The best thing to do might just be to ignore it and not let it get to you! Even though she's not being nice, use it as a challenge to be nice anyway, both to your friends and to her. She might be being mean because she's insecure or having a rough time, so try complimenting her on her hair or if she has a cute top. It could go a long way! If she says something mean to your face, I would talk with a trusted adult like a parent or guidance counselor about how to handle the problem if it turns into bullying. 

Meghan D.

by riadaisy on 12/3/2012 7:49:36 PM

 
 

I dont think you are a bad person especially if you really like the guy. but I would try to be more honest with your friend, I am sure it will hurt her when she finds out. Maybe you could try and set her up with another guy. That may make her feel better if that is possible.

by fashionqn on 12/3/2012 7:01:47 PM

 
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