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GUYS | DATING 101 | SPLITSVILLE

Getting over an ex? How to avoid a rebound relationship


 
There's this guy that’s new to my school. I don't know him that well, but lately he's been hanging around me and flirting with me. I'm just getting over my last BF. What do I do to let him know I'm not interested?

 

Sometimes you have to remember that being the new kid in school can be rough, and this guy doesn’t know anybody. Often guys flirt because that’s just how they interact with girls, and although he could be crushing on you, he might just be looking for some friends.
 
Still, there are a few subtle ways to let him know that you aren’t looking for a BF at the moment without flat out telling him. Introduce him as “My friend_______.” If he’s crushing on you, he will pick up on the subtle use of the word friend and know that you don’t see him as anything more. And if he starts chatting with you in class, ask a neighboring student for input. Bringing someone else into the convo gives you an opportunity to get out and makes everything less personal.
 
In the end, you’re going to have to be honest with him. He wouldn’t want to be the “rebound guy” when you’re just getting over your last BF. If he’s truly crushing on you, he wants to mean as much to you as you do to him. It might hurt him a little at first, but he will be thankful for it eventually. After a while try setting him up with one of your girl friends, nothing soothes a broken heart better than a new love interest.

BY HANNAH HICKLEN ON 12/23/2012 12:00:00 AM

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Mod
My boyfriend (or I guess ex-boyfriend) broke up with me 4 months ago and I am still not over it. I am only 15! I feel like at this age a break up should not affect me as much as it is but no matter how hard I try to move on and focus on other people and things in my life I end up balling by the end of the night. I mean I have never liked somebody so much and I was so happy with him. For Petes sake I was getting teary eyed at homecoming I was so dang happy! I have NEVER cried out of happiness. I think the because I felt that there were no problems in our relationship, the fact that we got along insanely well, and also that he was by far the nicest guy I have ever had any sort of relationship with makes it so hard to move on. But I am so sick of being upset. I really just want to feel happy again and be able to look at life on the bright side like I used to. Not holding back tears until I can't take it anymore. Any suggestions that might help me?

Hey chica, check out these articles: "5 healthy ways to get over him" and "5 Ways to Get Out of a Funk."  It's great that you're acknowledging that you want to move on, and you can totally do that!  Surrounding yourself with good friends and planning some fun activities will surely help.  You got this.  Good luck! 


Karin E.

by imarunner on 2/6/2013 2:30:38 AM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!!!!!
I just broke up with my first boyfriend. I felt horrible, and 2 days later, i asked him if he would take me back. he said no. i'm kinda mad, but the thing is, he acts like nothin happened. he acts like it didnt affect him ONE BIT. what do i do?

 

Hey! You have to move on from this guy. I know it's hard, but just try to concentrate on other things for a while, like your friends or an activity you love. It's tough now but every day your life will bring you something new to learn about or help with or share with someone, and when you make the most of your days, you'll move on even sooner than you think. I hope this helps girl! Smile   


Helen S.

by PuppyLover6 on 1/10/2013 8:51:04 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD ok so im in 8th grade and this guy is in 6th grade. He told a couple of my friends that he was going to ask me out. He's really a nice guy sweet, cute funny, etc.. would it be wierd if i dated him and also i cant date till high school. Wouldn't it be wierder to wait till im in 9th grade and hes in 7th. im also thinking hes to young to date but i do like him. What should i do??


Hey girl,

Two years might be a big deal, especially when you're young, but if you know him really well and think he's mature, there's no harm in giving him a chance. But if you're not allowed to date until high school, that's a bigger problem! You don't want to go against your parents' wishes, so stay friends with him for now and then talk to your parents about dating him when you're allowed next year. You might feel differently by then, so there's no need to worry about it now!

Meghan D.

by riplogan on 1/7/2013 8:00:21 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!!
I really like this guy, and we've become great friends this year, but there's a problem-- I've dated him before. We never really DATED, it was more like a title than an action. I'm thinking about asking him out at a party tonight, and I have his number and everything. So, I'm wondering, should I?
Other crucial info is that my guy friend told my crush I liked him, and he just smiled.

 

hey girl! I say go for it. If he turns ya down, it's his loss. It sounds like you two have chemistry so I would go for it. good luck! xoxo 


Katie L.

by SILly0905 on 12/31/2012 12:58:36 PM

 
 

MODMODMODMODMOD
ok so one of my good guy friends (lets call him Q) is always hugging me and like play flirts around me and i do the same but i don't think he likes me and idk if i like him like that either. He always talks to me during school but after school, we NEVER talk, and i don't want to start the convo because i might seem obnoxious.. i just miss him as a friend and don't know how to tell him to talk to me more. and he always is like lets oovoo! and when we are both online he says he can't every single time. :/ any suggestions

Hey girl,

If online chatting isn't working out, try starting a conversation with him at lunch or after school in person. If he's one of your good friends, it won't seem obnoxious at all! Just tell him you miss hanging out and spending time together as friends. I'm sure he'd love to catch up--online might just not be the best outlet.

Meghan D.

by textinggirl10 on 12/28/2012 9:00:51 PM

 
 



MOD!
Soo me and this guy are best friends! We tell each other everything, we hang out a lot, and we REALLY like each other. He's super sweet and my parents really like him...the only problem is, his parents aren't my biggest fans. We're only 15 and neither of us are allowed to date until we're 16 and we plan on it so I really want his parents to trust me and like me. I know there reasons for them not to love me...I'm not very good at talking to adults for one thing. Also, I'm kind of obnoxious. I know it probably annoys everyone but I can't help it. It's just in my nature. When I talk to my BGF about it, he says that's why he likes me I just wish his parents felt that way too. I talk way too much. What I'm trying to say is, how can I get his parents to like me? It's really important to me that they do. Thanks so much. 

 

Hey girlie, just be friendly and polite. Talk to his parents and take an interest in them. Ask them questions about how they're doing and what they like to get to know them better. Try to tone yourself down just a little bit around them. Being loud and fun is great with your friends, but might not be the best way to act around his parents.


Lauren T.

by lolomar on 12/26/2012 5:27:03 AM

 
 



MOD! MOD! MOD! MOD! Lauren T.
I talked to my ballet teacher in mid November about Pointe and she told me that she would see how I was when the session ends. The session just ended so I am going to ask her about it when I have dance. Except that was pretty long ago, so I feel like she may have forgotten, and I don't know if she meant to talk to me. How should I bring it up??

 

Hey girlie, just tell her that you're still interested in pointe and see what she says. It's very possible that she just forgot about it or didn't get a chance to talk to you. So bringing it up again certainly can't hurt anything.


Lauren T.

by WinnieGirlie on 12/23/2012 8:17:08 PM

 
 



MOD! MOD! MOD! Okay so I do ballet. I really want to get pointe shoes. I got this pair from the Nutcracker that were autographed as a soivenier. I tried them on and got on my toes.
It didn't hurt at all and I could do stuff without holding on to anything. I felt totally confident! But my ballet teacher hasn't put me on pointe.
I feel kind of confused because I was strong enough...

 

Hey girlie, talk to her. Tell her that you think you're ready for it and ask her why she's not. Maybe she doesn't know that you want to try it or hasn't seen how strong you are. 


Lauren T.

by WinnieGirlie on 12/23/2012 8:06:19 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
Why do some girls who JUST met a guy start dating him right
Away like when she first met him Isn't that rushing
Into things

 

Hey girlie, it might be. But different people are ready for different things. If that's something that you think is a good idea then don't it. Dating isn't always serious, it can also be a way to get to know someone better to see if you want a more serious relationship. 


Lauren T.

by redvelvetluv on 12/23/2012 7:52:26 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD ok so i met this guy a couple months ago, and we texted a bit but not a lot. anyways, i was talking to him before lunch and one of my friends(whose known him a couple years)said he likes me because of the way he was looking at me. i just got outta a relationship like 2 months ago, and i'm ready to date again, but A) this girl isn't the most trustworthy person and 2) idk how to get talking to him more if he does like me. i tried texting him a couple days ago but it was an awkward conversation. i know that i need to go talk to him in person, but i'm so nervous!! i'm guess i'm asking: what should i do? thanks!!

 

Hey girlie, make plans to spend time with him. If you really like each other, you might be nervous at first, but it'll get more comfortable. Go to a movie or get lunch together to get to know each other better and keep talking. 


Lauren T.

by karategirl78 on 12/23/2012 6:34:00 PM

 
 

I like this boy and I think he likes me 2.
Problem is...
#1)He has a GF but still flirts with me!
#2)He's shorter than me (at least 3 inches)

HEEELPPP!!!!!!!

by MiaMySweet on 12/23/2012 12:16:20 PM

 
 

I like this boy and I think he likes me 2.
Problem is...
#1)He has a GF but still flirts with me!
#2)He's shorter than me (at least 3 inches)

HEEELPPP!!!!!!!

by MiaMySweet on 12/23/2012 12:14:49 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD
ok so this guy asked me out and i said yes, and so he wuz like "ok so we shud just meet up at the movies" and i told him that i wasnt allowed to date, but inwould gladly be his gf in skool, and after that he was lyk alright i get it see u at skool,and he hasnt txted me since. Now im confused, are we gonna b dating at skool, or did that mean he wasnt interested anymore? Help! And also, if we r dating, how do i break the ice? I mean we dont know each other THAT well, but im pretty sure as the relationship goes on we'll get to know each other better, but how to i get rid of the awkwardness at the begginning? HELPPP

 

Hey girl, sounds like you jumped into it a little too quickly if he's your bf and its still awkward. I would slow things down a bit and just get to know him. Talk to him again, ask him what he meant, cause you would still like to be with him! 


lauren r.

by fashiondiva4 on 12/23/2012 10:18:22 AM

 
 



MOD MOD
So i like one of my best friends. I've liked him many times and I told him I liked him again, because we made a deal to do that. We were texting last night(that's when I told him) and he was cool with it, making jokes cause a lot of our friends think we should be together. He also said he had thought about us being a couple and that it wasnt entirely impossible. I then told him I wanted to ask him a question. He thought I was going to ask him out, so he said that he didnt want to ruin our friendship because he was scared that if we dated, that if/when we broke up, we wouldnt talk and he didnt say no, just that he would have to think about it.
Earlier, we were talking about who we would want to kiss on New Years Eve. When he asked me, he asked who i wanna kiss in general, not just on New Years Eve, to which I responded that I would kiss him. He said that he would have kissed me.
Can you help me figure this out? Thank you!
Happy Holidays Smile

 

Hey girl, you two obviously like each other. I think if you want to take that chance, you should ask him out. You two are headed down that path by asking each other those kinds of questions and flirting. if it's meant to be, it will happen!


lauren r.

by pottergirl135 on 12/23/2012 9:42:15 AM

 
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