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ADVICE | DEAR CAROL

Am I bi? I'm just not sure

 

 

 

Lately, I have been having feelings for boys and girls. I know it’s okay to be bisexual or gay, but when I try to convince myself I am bisexual, the feelings go away, and when I try to convince myself that I like boys, I have feelings for boys and girls. Is this just part of growing up? I’m only 12.

 

 

Dear Bi Bye,

Why try to convince yourself of anything? Just relax and enjoy your life. Most people are straight, but if you end up realizing that you’re gay or bisexual, that’s completely OK. Someday your questions about sexuality will have much clearer answers.
 
 

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BY CAROL WESTON ON 2/8/2013 12:00:00 AM

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21 Comments | Add Yours
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I cant tell you a lot about this because I'm only 12 too. I think it's normal, I've had feelings for boys and girls, but each time I do, I end up growing out of it. xx

by delaneycatherine on 3/15/2013 3:45:39 PM

 
 

I dont judge those who are gay or bisexual & ik i sometimes get simular feelings like these too . Not really feelings for girls but unlike most people , I can tell another girl she's pretty or looks cute for the day without saying " no homo " . Lol i do like guys , but idk - maybe its because i dont care what people think of me ?

by Beautified_Jailyn on 3/7/2013 7:01:01 PM

 
 

You could always talk to a counselor about your feelings. It was explained to me that just because we have these thoughts and feelings when we are young doesnt mean you are going to feel like that forever. I think because of puberty and what we see, it influences our desires when it comes to guys and relationships. Maybe because we almost always see female bodies used for ads and selling things we think about our bodies more when it comes to sex. You dont see mens bodies being used as much and not that their bodies are ugly, or we arent curious about what they look like, we just feel we may be bi because we get these feelings when we see and think about female and male bodies.

by fashionqn on 2/13/2013 2:42:13 PM

 
 

I reported a comment, above, by accident.

by bloop116 on 2/11/2013 5:23:00 PM

 
 

There is a posibility that you are bi. My guess is that you are probably not though. I though I was bi for a while but then I realised I was in a way kind of making myself feel I was bi. I was, am, and always will be a proud LGBTQ supporter. At the time that was when I started the whole support gay thing. I was so focused on that that I led myself to believing I was bi. I wasn't though. It is normal at an age like this to have mixed emotions an feelings...especially when it comes to your sexuality. My advice is that you calm down, don't try any relationship for a while, take it easy this Valentine's Day, and see if you are any more comfortable with yourself after a while.
I hope this helps. I wish you all the best. Just join my club and advice queen if you still have questions.

by bloop116 on 2/11/2013 5:21:08 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There is a kid at my school that no one really likes. Lets call him J. J can be really strange sometimes and isn't very good with people. Last year I got to know him and realized he isn't all that bad. Sometimes I get mad at him though because he can be really annoying sometimes. People are always calling him things like "gay","ginger", or they are just really mean. I tell them that it isn't nice to say things like that. J keeps asking me things like"do you hate me?" or "do you want me to die?" I always tell him of course not. Today he stopped talking. He told me via pen and paper that it was because of bullies. I told him good luck. I feel like I can and should be doing more to help him. I have absolutely no clue what to do. I figured that someone, whether it be a mod or. Nmm a regular User,




That's a really tough situation! You are already doing so much by being his friend and standing up for him. All you can really do, is continue what you're doing- stick up for him and be there for him. Good job girl! 
mailyse f.

by beaky54321 on 2/11/2013 3:57:37 PM

 
 

I felt the same way but then I thought about it talked to my mom n I realized I'm not. Ull figure it out don't worry

by Ayumi302 on 2/10/2013 6:47:41 PM

 
 

One of my friends is feeling the same way!

by fabina962 on 2/10/2013 11:08:22 AM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!!!!!
Im extremely dehydrated. Every like 5 minutes Im going to get water. Im kinda freaked out a bit. What might be going on. Please reply quickly. Its really freaking me out. Thanks. Im kinda scared. Thanks again.

Hey girlie,

It is normal to feel dehydrated sometimes, especially after working out or if it's hot outside. As long as you are drinking 8 glasses a day you will be fine Smile

Meghan D.

by hgrules on 2/8/2013 10:42:22 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!!
MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
my friend has depression (not diagnosed by a doctor, but it's realy obvious she does) and we're texting, and she just sent me this:
"i don't know what to do with myself... i keep eating all the time and being all alone in my room and i'm just so sad."
i dont know what to say! help!!!!'

 

Hey soccacheer, suggest she start writing. It seems like eating is her outlet for her depression. If she tried writing or something physical it may help her out a lot. Hope this helps! Xoxo Smile
Lynae P.

by soccacheer on 2/8/2013 7:18:56 PM

 
 

I'm attracted to males and females (and presumably other genders/or the lack thereof, just never met anyone who doesn't identify as male or female) but my sexuality is fluid. I'm always attracted to males, but my level of attraction to females varies. I don't like labeling my sexuality, and I don't like people making it sound like you have to fit neatly into a little box, because no one perfectly fits into every little labeled box. If someone were to ask me I'd say that my sexuality is fluid or I'm non-heterosexual, but I don't identify as one specific thing, and that is perfectly fine. As a female, I am aware that my sexuality may, and probably will, change over time. (Female brains are wired differently, meaning female sexuality can change throughout the course of your lifetime.)

by rockinlishy on 2/8/2013 6:04:16 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
So a few months ago my friend told me that she was bi. I still love her like a sister and it hasn't effected our friendship at all, but it's against our religion to be bisexual. It upsets me a lot and I'm not sure is she still is, but it's such an odd topic and I'd hate to bring it up...what can I do? Please help meFrown Thanks <3

 

Hey alexia_directioner<3, you should respect your friend's sexual preferences. How would you feel if she told you that she didn't like you being straight? While that is your friend, her personal interests are her business. Just because she likes boys and girls doesn't mean she's a different person. She's still the same friend. Just accept her for who she is. Hope this helps! Xoxo Smile


Lynae P.

by alexia_directioner<3 on 2/8/2013 4:48:40 PM

 
 

Heyy Girlies, Please check out my club; "It's all about Fashion and Beauty!!"! If you go to my profile you can find it there and join(: We post daily and answer all questions!!! Topics we talk about:Clothes,Make-up,Nails,Hair,Skin-Care♥

by nazirah817 on 2/8/2013 4:42:19 PM

 
 



MOD!
I'm only ten and I'm bi, but am I too young to know what I am? One of my friends posted a status saying she's bi and someone commented "You're too young to know what you are." on it. She's the same age as me. I'm scared to tell people at school about it though. Help!!!!

 

Hey BriannaM911, I don't think you're too young. When boys say they like girls, or when girls say they like boys no one tells them that they are too young. I think it's only because some people consider being bisexual and homosexual as weird or a phase that a person grows out of. If you feel a genuine attraction for boys and girls, I think you are bisexual. You know you better than anyone else. Hope this helps! Xoxo Smile 


Lynae P.

by BriannaM911 on 2/8/2013 4:03:36 PM

 
 

:o yes! im not a freak for feeling the way i do ^-^ thank you person who wrote dis question XD I'm the same age as u too
^-^

by mayanunna on 2/8/2013 3:20:45 PM

 
 

There have been multiple studies that suggest girls are more bisexual than guys. This is partly why girls tend to be more touchy-feely with one another than guys are with their bros. Girls are also more likely to tell one another that they're beautiful/attractive than guys are with other guys. This is in part because they are more likely to recognize attractive features in other girls than guys with other guys. What you're feeling is totally normal and more common than most girls your age are likely to admit. Don't feel like you need to give yourself a label, though. You are who you are - what does it matter if you're gay, straight, or somewhere in between?

by MadiBird on 2/8/2013 2:33:33 PM

 
 

I'm glad somebody asked this and this magazine put it on their home page. It's a really important thing. I myself am bisexual, and I'm twelve, but I've known for a few years. Whatever you are, just know that you are special, and you deserve good treatment.
My best friend just came out to our 7th grade student body as transgender, and everybody's been really accepting of him, so if you ever become sure that you are bisexual and want to come out, kids are pretty accepting these days.

by potterheadmeetswhovian on 2/8/2013 11:45:19 AM

 
 

I think all of the TV shows and books that teens watch and read that include bisexual and gay characters get teens worried and picking apart their own sexual identities. When in reality very few people are actually bi and if you were gay you would know it. Everyone worries about this to some extent I suppose but most times it is for nothing because if you really were homosexual you would have known or started to figure that out about yourself L-O-N-G before now. I wouldn't worry! Smile Oh and also are brains are funny/deceiving things. When we are worried or focused on something we can actual convince ourselves that it's true. Like last year when the stomach flu broke out in my school..I was so nervous about getting sick my stomach and throat actually started hurting, but it was all in my head. So, try to calm down Smile

by maggie183 on 2/8/2013 11:09:46 AM

 
 



MOD! MOD! MOD! So when you go on Pointe in ballet, you wear toe pads. I'm going on pointe soon, and I don't know what color to get! They each come in combinations of blue/green, purple/hot pink, and orange/pink. They have nude, but I want the colored ones. I just can't decide on which color to get!!




Hey girl, tough decision! I'd go for purple/hot pink, GL's favorite colors, obvi. But, the choice is up to you! xx  
Jess D.

by WinnieGirlie on 2/8/2013 10:47:59 AM

 
 

Hey Girlie! It's normail for young people to have feelings for both boys and girls! It's all a part of growing up!

by WinterK on 2/8/2013 10:09:14 AM

 
 

I have this feeling sometimes too! I don't wont to be gay or bi, but I just have that feeling sometimes. Everyone has a little gay in them! Lol

by YouCanCallMeCat on 2/8/2013 5:40:43 AM

 
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