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GUYS | DEAR CAROL

Fighting over a guy with your BFF? Here's what to do


 
My BFF and I like a lot of the same boys. Now, she says I need to stop liking certain boys just because she likes them.

Dear Friend,

Try saying something like, “It’s awkward that we like the same guy, but it means we have excellent taste! Let’s make a pact that if one of us starts going out with someone, we won’t let it get in the way of our friendship.” And be sure to talk about other things in your lives besides crushes.
 
SERIOUS STUFF? For serious issues, don’t wait. Visit our HELP! page now.
For more on Carol Weston, visit her website: carolweston.com or like her Facebook page.
 
To order Girltalk: All the Stuff Your Sister Never Told You, click here.

To order The Diary of Melanie Martin, click here.
 
 

BY CAROL WESTON ON 2/20/2013 12:00:00 PM

POSTED IN , , , , , ,

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23 Comments | Add Yours
SORT: OLDEST FIRST | NEWEST FIRST
 

So, last weekend my bf took me to a concert and my bff wanted to go. She said she ws meeting someone there and that she would hang out with him. But plans changed and she was stuck with us. Most ppl would say she was the 3rd wheel but her and my bf were making me feel like the 3rd wheel. It looked very weird bc she was totally flirting with him infront of me and I got mad at both of them. I later found out the truth and forgave my bf but i wont talk to my bff bc she has done this with all my exs also. Its like she is boycrazy and cant make up her mind, so i stopped talking to her. Am i doing the right thing or should i talk to her? Ive gotten some mixed signals and wanted to c what yall thought? would u forgive ur bff for flirting and hanging on ur bf in front of u? and ur parents?

by dess14325 on 3/25/2013 10:11:20 PM

 
 

um i dont think it would be good to not to tell her mom becuz she can get pregnant or get a nasty sexually transmitted disease like that. So even though your friend might hate u think about what is best for her and her health becuz when people find out you'll be in trouble too. That is why it is good to stay out of stuff like that until your an adult.

by TravelCrazyChic2012 on 3/25/2013 10:47:46 AM

 
 

My Friend Is Only 12 Years Old And She Has Gave A Guy A Blow Job And Had Sex With Him .... And He Is My Ex BF But Idk What To Do... Should i Tell Her Mom? If Yes How?

by Who_Am_I on 3/1/2013 6:40:57 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
So theres this guy that ive always been friends with but never super close but we've started talking more and im falling for him and i think he is falling for me. He gave up his seat and let me have it then sat next to me then he lied to the teacher (he never lies) just so i wouldnt get my phone taken away and then said he always has my back, his hair was all messed up and he let me fix it and he always gives me compliments about how i look and he let me write on his folder and i wrote that im awesome and he has just kept it there, and if i give him something he keeps it even ifs it just some tape or something, if he needs something he comes and asks me he always talks to me and says hi whenever he sees me and he let me have some of his drink and he loves to make me laugh... so is he just being a good friend or does he like me!?!?!?!!??? Help!
Thank you!

 

Hey girlie, if this has happened kind of suddenly then he probably likes you. Keep flirting with him and see where things go from here. 


Lauren T.

by HopeIsNotHopeless on 2/27/2013 7:53:15 PM

 
 

Some guys are worth fighting for, not literally but some are. Then there are the guys not worth the trouble, even if they are cute, many of them dont have a great personality. With those guys it is best to give them to your enemies and let them enjoy and find out.

by fashionqn on 2/24/2013 5:27:06 PM

 
 

Mod Mod Mod.
So I like this guy in my grade. I'm really bad at holding my feelings inside. He has a girlfriend (About 6 months) that is a good friend of mine. I don't want to make my friend upset by showing hints that I like him.. What should I do?

Hey girlie,

If he has a girlfriend, he's off limits for now, especially if his girlfriend is your friend! If you were dating him, would you want him to flirt with someone else? Try staying just friends with him for now and keeping your eyes open to other cuties at your school who are available Smile

Meghan D.

by bluegirl80 on 2/22/2013 10:14:14 PM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD!
Okay there's this guy i like. He knows who i am and stuff. But everytime I try to talk to him my friend comes and interupts! She flirts with him a ton and its starting to get really annoying. She cant even date yet! And the worst part is...she knows i like him! Is there any way how i can talk to him? Just him and me. Plus his birthday is coming up. would it be weird if i told him happy birthday? I watch him perform his songs and after ward i say he did really good. Anything I can say?

Hey girlie,

Maybe you should talk to your friend privately without him there. If she likes him too, she might be hurt that you're flirting with him. You'll have to decide if talking to him is worth possibly losing your friendship with her. I don't think it would be weird to say happy birthday and say he did well, he would probably think that was nice! Check out this article for more advice on liking the same guy as your friend: http://www.girlslife.com/post/2011/12/02/Boy-or-bestie.aspx?cp=all

Meghan D.

by Live2sing on 2/22/2013 10:04:11 PM

 
 



MOD MOD! So a guy that i know but i'm not great friends with messaged me on facebook just saying hey! he started asking me for my snapchat and then asked for my number so i gave it to him. he texted me first 2 days in a row telling me that i was really nice and cute and that we needed to hang out. i like him a little but every time i see him at school he doesn't even bother to look at me .. we were the only ones in the hallway the other day and he said NOTHING! i feel like he's just messing with me and it makes me sad because no guys ever like me .. advice? thanks <3

 

Hey softball6, I think he's just really shy in person. He may have wanted you to initiate communication in the hall, since he was the one to do it online. So next time you see him, go up to him. Hope this helps! Xoxo Smile  


Lynae P.

by softball6 on 2/22/2013 6:05:58 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD!!!!!!! I reaaaaally need somebody's help with this issue! (and maybe if ur seeing this and ur not a modder, possibly give me extra advice on my page? thanks!) ok, so I reaaally like my bgf. but he doesn't like me. I asked him out and all that but he said just as a friend. I am FINALLY over feeling heart broken... but I need some tips on how to stay his best frnd and to make the love feelings go away! PLEASE help! I would reaaaaaally appreciate it! thank u SOOO much! <3

 

Hey lalalagurl, you can't make your feelings disappear in a day girl. Give yourself time. Slowly start shifting your focus from him to other things. Pick up hobbies to occupy your time. Hang out with other friends. Getting your feelings out on paper may help. This can be a good thing. So he doesn't like you romantically, but you still have a really good guy friend. Something romantic could've ruined your relationship forever. And how many people can say they have good friends? Hope some of this works for you! Xoxo Smile  


Lynae P.

by lalalagurl on 2/22/2013 5:23:00 PM

 
 



Mod ive sent really important questions and they never showed up but plz help idk wats wrong with me I am 12 and lately I cant stop threathing some really annoying kids because they call me my crush name I try to ignore them but I cant I was bullied alot last year but at the start of this school year I wasn't like this.one minute im happy next im not.im also bummed becuz my crush who used to like me now probably thinks im crazy he would be really sweet and now hes probably scared and creeped out by me .plz help wat should I do ive thought of asking him if we can start fresh but I get scared is there another way tell him I want to start fresh without asking him

 

hey! I'm sorry you were bullied, but that's no reason to start acting like a bully yourself. Don't bring yourself down to their level. maybe with your crush just be friendly. say hi and smile. if you act like you're starting fresh then he'll know you have Smile 


Helen S.

by Rain278 on 2/21/2013 7:42:56 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
Ok so I really like my ex boyfriend, and we are really good friends (really.) I still like him I guess is more accurate. What do you think I should do? My friend says that he might still like me. IM CONFUSED

 

Hey girlie, talk to him about it. Tell him how you feel and see if he returns the feelings. It might be a risky things to do, but if you really like him, it'll be worth it. 


Lauren T.

by ssunshine13 on 2/20/2013 8:14:22 PM

 
 

The Alphas United
Are you alpha enough? Of course you are! If you weren't you wouldn't have even heard of this club. My Clique and I will give you tips on friends, drama, boys, and keeping your life from crashing down. Let's dominate! Betas welcome. Haters, fashion don't even think about it. Join now!

by transform2314 on 2/20/2013 8:04:51 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!! Okay so I asked my crush to my schools dance that's on Friday today, he said he's not going. I kept my cool and just said "okay, no hard feelings right?" But I'm a little scared, because that was the same response I got from a guy last time I got the guts to ask someone out. And he was a, well, how do I say LIAR without being rude? My friend says he's too nice a guy to do the same thing the last boy did, but still, am I being paranoid? Please help

 

Hey girlie, it's not weird if you don't make it weird. Just act the same way around him that you usually do and he'll see that nothing has changed between the two of you. And saying he's not going might mean that he doesn't want to go with you, but it wasn't really a no. 


Lauren T.

by Lemonlime123 on 2/20/2013 7:49:08 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
So theres this cute guy in one of my classes, he's a year older but thats okay. We don't sit by each other and we've talked like once. Sometimes we make eye contact but I don't to creep him out by starring at him haha SmileWere friends on Facebook not like we've talked on their either though. How can I get his attention, or get him to talk to me, i'm not very shy and I tend to be very outgoing even in class, but I tend to shell up around boys. Got any advice to get him to approach me? Thanks so much Smile

 

Hey girlie,talking to him on facebook might be a good start. That way there's less pressure and you have more time to think about what you want to say before you say. When you get comfortable with that you can start trying to talk to him in class and spending more time with him. 


Lauren T.

by GrassFairy on 2/20/2013 7:36:05 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD I have seen a bit of a drop in my grades. School is getting harder but I am kind of struggling to take away my social life and other curricular activities. Also, I feel as if I'm getting signs of a depression. I don't smile as much and I've been thinking about suicide. What is the first thing I should do before it's officially a depression?

 

Hey girlie, talk to someone. It could be anyone from your best friend to a parent to a counselor or teacher at school. Getting your negative feelings out in words might help you and they might have some good advice. If you really think that you are depressed then see a doctor. A doctor can put you on anti-depressents and recommend therapy that will help you get better. 


Lauren T.

by PuppyCT on 2/20/2013 7:25:01 PM

 
 

Hey GL chicas! Check out my club, "It's all about Fashion and Beauty!!!" We have advice for any fashion/beauty sitch. Please check it out girlies! <3 Fashion and Beauty Crew

by nazirah817 on 2/20/2013 6:34:22 PM

 
 



mod mod mod mod
s thx soooo much!

 

Hey girlie, I think it's fine to tell your mom if it comes up in conversation. You shouldn't keep it from her, and if you're staying away from inappropriate content then you don't have anything to hide. 


Lauren T.

by fiafia17 on 2/20/2013 5:52:58 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD!!
Well I like this guy on my co-ed basketball team. There's only two games and one practice left in the season. We've talked before, and last time I went to the YMCA he was there and everytime I walked by he screamed my name as a joke Smile I don't know if he likes me, but I really want to get his number before the end of the season. Any tips on how and when to get his digits?

 

hey girl! you could ask him if he'd be willing to help you hone your b-ball skills, or challenge him to a 1 on 1 game. offer to set up a hang out time via text, and then give him your number.

xoxo 


Katie L.

by WashingtonGirlie13 on 2/20/2013 2:15:59 PM

 
 



Mod mod mod
So I found out online that guys like the smell of cinnamon and vanilla. I saw that my crush did this poll about his favorite scent, and he said cinnamon. Should I wear a cinnamon scented perfume? And also, I wear makeup whenever I see him, but I don't want to look like I'm trying too hard. Any beauty tips? Smile

 

hey girl! well that depends...is cinnamon YOUR fave scent? try not to do stuff just to win over a guy. you shouldn't have to change yourself to get his attention! wear a scent you love and makeup that makes you feel good, and you'll attract him with your confidence and happiness.

xoxo 


Katie L.

by kittycatmeowmeowchelsea on 2/20/2013 2:11:33 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD MOD
I don't know if it's because I'm on my period but my Iv been feeling REALLY sad lately like today
I cried because my dad wasn't home which is weird because usually I get really mad at at him
because he says the wrong things but today I got really upset
because he wasn't here I don't know why Iv been feeling really sad and overly
sensitive also when my two sisters were over my one sis and her GF
and my other sis and her finance I had really bad cramps I was really irritated I sort of snapped at my mom because she kept asking me if I was ok over and over again
and my sisters finance was like don't talk back to your mom!
It made me really mad because it's not his place to say anything

 

hey girl! this could all totally be because you're on your period, or maybe you're just having a bad day. try not to blame yourself, just work through the feelings you're having the best you can. every day can't be the best day Smile

xoxo 


Katie L.

by redvelvetluv on 2/20/2013 2:00:09 PM

 
 



Mod mod mod
I got rejected by this guy I really liked a few months ago. He started avoiding me after that. It's been like that forever now, but he sometimes likes my tbh statuses on facebook. When we had to shake hands, he hesitated and looked awkward. Should I just ask him if we can start over? I feel like I told him that I liked him a bit too soon. We barely even knew each other. So how's this: "Hey, I really need to talk to you. I've been noticing that your still avoiding me. That one day when we needed to shake hands, I saw your face. I'm over what happened a few months ago, aren't you? Can we just start over and pretend that what happened never happened? I liked you because I thought you were a nice guy, and you are a nice guy, but it's stupid to still be avoiding each other". So should I say that to him? Thanks

 

hey girl! I think that's a really mature idea. Kudos to you for being the bigger person! I say go for it. good luck!

xoxo 


Katie L.

by isabellec on 2/20/2013 1:19:44 PM

 
 



Mod mod mod mod mod mod
Ok so I've been hanging out with this group of guy and girl friends all weekend and we all really like each other cuz we have alot of fun but there is this one guy I really like! For truth or dare he had to kiss my cheek and it was do cute! Then he like was leaning against me and I had to hug him from behind and it was really sweet! The next day we went to the movies and this was our 2nd movie we'd seen as a group and he didn't make a move! (He sat next to me both times) and then the next day we went to the mall and he talked to me like always but I just kinda want him to make a move! We're going to the movies Friday... Any advice?

 

hey girl! if this guy is still not making any moves, maybe it's your turn to do so. try inching closer to him so he gets the hint, and see where it goes from there. Still nothing? If you're bold, try holding his hand. good luck!

xoxo 


Katie L.

by Erinhult on 2/20/2013 1:03:10 PM

 
 


Mod Mod Mod!
Ok. I posted this before but it disappeared so I guess I'll put it here since this is new.. Ok. So I got my period in March. Each month I get the moody aspects, the breakouts, bloating, but I don't get my period. I get really painful cramps too that are more painful then when I got my actual period. Do you think that there is something wrong?




Hey girlie! So sorry your post disappeared! As for your question, I really wish I could offer you some great advice. Unfortunately, I'm not exactly an expert on the matter, and I don't want to point you in the wrong direction. What I can recommend is talking to your parents and seeing a doctor about it soon.




Florence N.

by bluegirl80 on 2/20/2013 12:21:30 PM

 
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