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My bestie isn't acting like a very good friend

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BFF’s are supposed to be loyal, right? Well, my BFF is a different story. She does not call me back, and when I ask if she’s free, she always says, “I don’t know.”

Dear Annoyed by BFF,

So rephrase the question. When someone asks if I’m free, before I say “Yes,” I want to know if she’s inviting me to a black-tie opening or to dig up dandelions. Try to be a fun, caring friend, and I hope she’ll do the same. (You deserve a friend who will call you back, after all.) And since friendships shift at this stage, reach out to others too.

BY CAROL WESTON ON 3/22/2013 12:00:00 AM

POSTED IN bust my bestie problem, bad friend, dear carol solves BFF probs, growing apart

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23 Comments | Add Yours

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One day my BFF dumped me for these two other girls because she didn't like me and now she won't talk to me but I talke to her. It hurts trust me I am still trying to fight through with it. No one should have to go through these problems but everyone does.

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by Volleyballchick79 on 5/11/2013 3:36:42 PM

I don't know who my real BFF is!!!!! My one BFF is always mean self-centered and brags ALOT!!!! Should I still call her my best friend even if she has a REALLY big mouth? I don't know if I should blame her and I don't know how to tell her how much of a untrustworthy she is to me. I don't know what to say she takes medication for the way she acts. PLEASE HELP I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY!!!!!

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by kelly4489 on 5/7/2013 9:21:57 PM

MOD MOD MOD
Today at school I was playing around with my friend like linking my arms then my one "best friend" says "I am not standing by you" then the 2 other girls moved away to. At the beginning I thought it was funny then I went to go stand by them and they moved away so I shrugged it off and went to stand by them because I didn't want to be alone. Then they said "No I don't want to be by you" Then at lunch they said "Hey, sit by me" I said "NO IF YOU DON'T WANT TO STAND BY ME THEN WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO SIT BY ME!!" Then I stormed off and the whole lunch they didn't say anything. When I got home I got a text from one friend saying "I'm sorry about what I said...it was meaning to be a joke but, the tone I said it in probably made it hurtful" So I forgave her but my other friend texted me "What did I do? It wont help if you ignore me!" But this isn't the first time she has done this... so should I forgive her even though she has done this before and didn't say sorry?

Hey zippyhorse, I think you should forgive her. I don't think she meant to hurt your feelings. Even her texting you "what did i do?" shows she wasn't trying to be mean. Your other friend said it was a joke, so let them know it hurts your feelings. I'm sure they won't do it again if you explain how it makes you feel. Hope this helps! Xoxo

Lynae P.

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by zippyhorse on 4/23/2013 7:08:26 PM

MOD MOD MOD!!
I really need your help! My "best friend" was my actual best friend since 1st grade. Now all of a sudden, she turned her back on me! She hangs out with all these people who don't like me because she told them rumors about me. She calls them her best friend when she just met them that year! She always lies to me now and sneaks out to hang out with other people.. I'm sick of her lying to me that she's going out to eat when she's actually going out with a friend. I feel jealous when she says she's with someone else because we never hang out anymore.. And everytime at school when she's with her so called "best friend" and sees me, she ignores me and walks faster... IDK what to do!!! HELP!!

Hey girlie. It sounds like it's time for one last intervention. Have her sit down with you, and explain to her that you really value her as a friend and you have for a really long time, but the way she's acting right now isn't at all how a best friend should be acting. If she doesn't seem to be able to take you seriously, or if she acts like she doesn't care, it's probably time to pull back and work on strengthening your relationship with other friends.

Florence N.

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by danieluv124 on 4/19/2013 11:25:54 AM

I have a really great friend. When i moved to a new school in the fifth grade, she was very excited to meet me and we stayed best friends for the whole year. I felt like i knew her forever! Well, we stayed in touch over the summer but when school started, things changed. She met a new girl on her softball team and they became BFFs. They are both really nice and awesome people, but when they are together its like they mute out the rest of the world and live in their own personal little world where they whisper to each other.I consider them both good friends of mine, but still... I know i should give them some personal time together since i know what its like, but theyre practically together 24/7. I just want my best friend back! Any Advice? Please Help!

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by smileyface11401 on 4/17/2013 5:19:21 PM

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