You heart your BFF and would do anything to protect her. When she
tells you a secret, you obvs have to keep it. Her new crush’s name is
for your ears only and you’ll never spill. But is there ever a time you
should break girl code? We’ll tell you why sometimes speaking up is
more important than keeping a sacred bond.
“Sometimes I cut myself...”
your BFF is harming herself, it is important to tell an adult. Even if
she says she has it under control, cutting is often a deeper issue
than you think. Desiring pain can be caused by depressing or serious
low self-esteem. It can also lead to suicide. Before you speak up,
encourage your gal pal to talk to her ‘rents about getting a therapist.
If she has an adult she can talk to, there is no need to take action.
As long as an adult is aware of the situation, her secret is safe with
you! However, if she refuses to tell her ‘rents, it is your
responsibility to tell an adult. Speak with the school counselor or
someone you can trust. She may hate you at first, but, once she gets
help, she’ll be happy she told you the secret. Her safety is more
important than girl code.
“My boyfriend hit me...”
know how much your BFF hearts the bad boys, but when is she in danger?
Dating shy guys in leather jackets is your gal pal’s fave hobby. When
she tells you about her new BF’s strange behavior, you can’t help but
wonder if he’s too bad... In private, she tells you that he once hit
her. She promises it was a one time thing and begs you not to tell a
soul. Abusive relationships are dangerous and she must end things with
him immediately. Tell her that you will not allow her to put herself in
danger over some scary dud. Before she does anything, she must tell her
parents. Breaking up with an abuser can set him off and she’ll feel
safer with her parents by her side. If she refuses to end things with
him, you have to call her ‘rents. Trust us, abusive relationships never
end in happily ever after. Comfort her by saying, “It is for your own
safety and I will be by your side every step of the way.”
“I hate my body...”
girls are uncomfortable in their own skin, but when does it become
dangerous? When your BFF tells you that she stopped eating as much or
started making herself throw up after meals, you need to take action.
Eating disorders are deadly and your BFF’s life is in danger. Tell her
to speak to her mom or a guidance counselor and make her feel more
comfortable by offering to come along. If she’s too scared, tell someone
by yourself. She may want to keep this a secret, but anorexia and
bulimia are dangerous diseases. Promise her that it is not her fault she
is suffering with this and there are people who can help her.
are many other scenarios that may endanger your BFF. Keep in mind,
anything that seriously harms a friend physically or emotionally should
be shared with an adult. If you can’t convince her to consult her
‘rents, speak with someone you both trust. Remind her that you love and
care about her. Once she gets help, your gal pal will be grateful that
she told you her secrets, even if she doesn’t admit it.
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BY YAEL FRISCHLING ON 4/9/2013 12:00:00 AM
POSTED IN eating disorder, anorexia, bulimia, bff, bust my bestie problem, good friend, by bestie is spilling my secrets, how can I help my friend, abuse, cutting, dealing with depression, addiction, body image, I feel fat